"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

How to get out of the friend zone

L

Lennyboy

New Member
Joined
Jan 31, 2012
Messages
9
Reaction score
0
I think I'm in to deep in the friend zone with this girl.

Any tips on how I could possibly get out?

Just ask her? Try to kiss her? etc etc.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

F

f283000

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 28, 2007
Messages
2,153
Reaction score
197
1. Realize that it is almost impossible to get out of the friend zone and not worth the effort to try.
2. While you are swimming against the tide and fighting against huge odds to get out of the friend zone spending a great deal of time and effort realize there are lots and lots of single cute women in your area that right now are feeling a little lonely, and would love nothing more than a little romance in their lives. Why not concentrate your efforts on them rather than an endeavor that has the odds strongly against you? (fighting the friendzone)
3. Realize the mistakes you made that got you into the friendzone in the first place so that you do not fall into that trap again with other women.
 
Last edited:

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

Z

Zerro

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 23, 2011
Messages
570
Reaction score
24
Not all cases of friendzoning are terminal but the chances of recovery are extremely low.

Probably all you can do right now is just walk away. If she cares at all she'll seek you out but don't bet on that happening.
 
F

floydb25

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 26, 2011
Messages
1,762
Reaction score
108
Location
NC
f283000 said:
1. Realize that it is almost impossible to get out of the friend zone and not worth the effort to try.
2. While you are swimming against the tide and fighting against huge odds to get out of the friend zone spending a great deal of time and effort realize there are lots and lots of single cute women in your area that right now are feeling a little lonely, and would love nothing more than a little romance in their lives. Why not concentrate your efforts on them rather than an endeavor that has the odds strongly against you? (fighting the friendzone)
3. Realize the mistakes you made that got you into the friendzone in the first place so that you do not fall into that trap again with other women.
Click to expand...
What he said. #3 is vitally important. Don't act like a friend, and you won't become one. Don't let this experience drag you down, and make you assume that no one likes you, either. Avoid self-defeating thoughts and behaviors. Just switch up your game with the next one.

Generally, if you're out doing your thing, talking to ladies, fooling around, going on dates, having fun, etc, this won't be an issue. Don't focus on only one girl until a relationship is well-established. Don't go in with the expectation of finding a relationship, either, because that is counter-intuitive to this. Have the single-minded frame going until a good one sticks. This is usually when you get a relationship, as well - because you're not trying too hard, are independent, having a good time, etc. All attractive.
 
nismo-4

nismo-4

Moderator
Joined
Jan 31, 2005
Messages
4,438
Reaction score
1,142
Location
From New Orleans, Louisiana to Atlanta, Georgia!!!
How to get out the friendzone?

Don't go your ass in it.

"Your honor, how do i avoid taking my ass in the friendzone?"

Be sexual and physical and a jerk from the get go. Don't be intimidated. Be the intimidator. That means lead motherf**ker. It's better to get rejected as an alpha jerk than strung along as a beta male (which is a more painful rejection).

In your case, make a damn move. If she says you're just friends, you say that you have enough friends. And walk off.

Otherwise, you have 3 options.

1. Try to get out, which is a snowball's chance in hell. :nono:
2. Accept that your princess is in another castle and just advance to the next world where someone might be interested in your ass.
3. Keep her as a wingwoman.

Doing a combination of 2 (93%) and 3 (7% after you got another girl ) and spinning more plates is the best solution that is for you. That's Judge nismo's ruling.

Case closed. Learn from this. :yes:
 
R

runner83

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 22, 2010
Messages
1,098
Reaction score
47
Location
Australia
Mike32ct said:
There is no cure. Focus only on prevention.
Click to expand...
Exactly.

If she is a part of your social circle then don't go burning bridges, but at the same time, don't waste time on her that could be more profitably invested on other more interested chicks.

If she doesn't have any connection in your life, then make a move, see what happens and if you don't bang her then move on.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

N

Naughty Ninja

Banned
Joined
Apr 9, 2010
Messages
2,419
Reaction score
98
Location
Banned
Lennyboy said:
I think I'm in to deep in the friend zone with this girl.

Any tips on how I could possibly get out?

Just ask her? Try to kiss her? etc etc.
Click to expand...

Simple. Do the exact opposite of what you think you've done to get you there in the first place.
 
SamTheHobit

SamTheHobit

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 10, 2011
Messages
1,514
Reaction score
95
Location
South Africa
leave for six months and then you'll have a fresh start with her.
 
M

MaudGrimes

Don Juan
Joined
Jan 11, 2012
Messages
31
Reaction score
1
You'll not get out of it - my bet is the longer you stay friends with her the worse it will get for you. Like the previous post maybe if you leave it for six months, but I'd spend those six months looking for other birds
 
I

ilikecharlene

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 4, 2012
Messages
335
Reaction score
8
It's not impossible, but difficult.

If you change to become confident/Alpha male-esque, she would wonder who the real you is, and may not trust you.

The trick is, as said earlier in the thread, not to fall into the friendzone in the first place.
 
S

SSBS

Don Juan
Joined
Feb 16, 2012
Messages
74
Reaction score
6
It can be done.

Just tell her the truth. If she shoots you down, then tell her you can't be friends with her and walk away.

Then wait.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

Read more...

You must log in or register to reply here.
22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
Top