"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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How to get out of the friend-zone?

Sherlock-Holmes

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Hey guys,

I've been seeing this girl for around 4 months now, but i belief she only treats me as a friend. Any recommendation to get out of the friend-zone?

Opinions, tips would be very much appreciated!
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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GetOveIT

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Sherlock-Holmes said:
Hey guys,

I've been seeing this girl for around 4 months now, but i belief she only treats me as a friend. Any recommendation to get out of the friend-zone?

Opinions, tips would be very much appreciated!
The real question is:

Do you treat her as a friend?

If no NEXT her
 

K2000kidd

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Obviously you haven't been sexual in any way whatsoever
or she shot you down and you stuck around hoping for a chance
either way you're doomed. Walk away now
 

Maxtro

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Four months in the friendzone?

Before you try to get out of the friendzone you must be certain you are fine losing your friendship with her. I mean that if things go wrong there is a chance you may never talk to her again. Are you willing to risk that?

If so, make a move. Try to kiss her. It might be a bit easier if the both of you are a bit tipsy.

If things go wrong, prepare to suffer the consequences.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

Read more...

Sherlock-Holmes

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Actually im having a upcoming project with her. But i dont want her to be "just a friend", you know. I did hold her hands, and she doesn't seem to mind, besides being a little shy or such.
 

Igetit!

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Sherlock-Holmes said:
Actually im having a upcoming project with her.
The fact that you have a project coming up with her just makes things worse.


What gets you friendzoned is constantly being around a girl WITHOUT showing your interest in her. So this project you have coming up is just more of you being around her WITHOUT showing interest.


If you truely are in the friendzone with her,then you can forget it.


It's easier to avoid the friendzone than to get out of it. So if you didn't have the knowledge or wisdom to avoid this thing in the first place,then you DEFINATELY don't have the understanding to get out of it.



Sherlock-Holmes said:
But i dont want her to be "just a friend", you know. I did hold her hands, and she doesn't seem to mind, besides being a little shy or such.
Well if you're bold enough to hold her hand NOW,then why didn't you do it 4 MONTHS AGO before this friendzone situation came up?



All you can do is ask her out. Maxtro had it right:you need to be prepared to lose her as a "friend" because there's a good chance that that's what's going to happen.


I'd just forget it.


If you truely,truely are in the friendzone with this girl...I'd just forget it.
 

Sherlock-Holmes

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We went out for movies, dinners, and i send her home a time or 2. But i mean, normal friends do that too right? LOL!
 

Maxtro

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Sherlock-Holmes said:
We went out for movies, dinners, and i send her home a time or 2. But i mean, normal friends do that too right? LOL!
Yes, girlfriends do, do that.

Do you do anything with her that only a man could do?

Have you ever done anything with her that she couldn't do with a brother?
 

Igetit!

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Sherlock-Holmes said:
We went out for movies, dinners, and i send her home a time or 2.
You're being a fool if you're the one paying for all this.


Dinners and movies for a girl you're not even dating? Wow.



More and more it looks like that Rescue Mission dude is right in what he says.



The dinners and movies just makes your chances of dating her even WORSE.


You ever heard of "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?"


Well if you're already taking her to movies and dinners WITHOUT officially dating each other,if she can get these things from you now,while STILL BEING SINGLE,then what motivation or reason would she have for wanting to get into a relationship with you?


All this you're doing for her,and in four months,all you've done is hold her hand? :crackup: LOL....that's a good one dude.


Boy,I needed that laugh. :crackup:



Sherlock-Holmes said:
But i mean, normal friends do that too right? LOL!
Stop being foolish.

This is justification.


Why do you care if normal friends go to movies and dinner? You just said in a earlier post that you don't want to be just "a friend" with her.



Well if you don't want to be "just a friend",then why are you acting like just a friend to her?



If she does (or has) friendzone you,it's not her fault. You can't blame her for this.



All she's doing is recipricating.


All she's doing is sending out to you what YOU FIRST sent out to her.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Sherlock-Holmes

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Nope i never paid for her!
We always split in half.

Maxtor, could you emphasize what such things could be?

I think im in deep ****.
 

Maxtro

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The most obvious thing is sex. The next level down is a kiss on the lips. Then there is suggestive touching like putting your hand on her thigh or brushing some hair away from her face, and other intimate things like that. Have you put your arm around her waist?

Then there are also conversations about sex and using inuendos.

What Igetit says it's right, you're basically dating her except she is getting what she want's and you aren't.

BTW I already did the same thing you're doing now. After spending months with the chick, she didn't even have a clue that I liked her, I was just her BFF. Of course the forever part ended when I told her of my interest. I haven't spoken to her in a year and probably never will again.
 

nismo-4

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Sherlock-Holmes said:
Nope i never paid for her!
We always split in half.

Maxtor, could you emphasize what such things could be?

I think im in deep ****.
You are. Why the f**k did you not escalate? Be sexual!

When you arrive in the friendzone, it's tough to get out! Don't land your ass there in the first place!
 

Sherlock-Holmes

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PRECISELY! I didn't know i liked her in the beginning. I did
brush some hair off her face yesterday night, and sometimes
touching her waist, but for breif periods. =/
 

Maxtro

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Well Holmes, the next time you are with her you need to make a move. Since you've already been that intimate with her it shouldn't be hard to go for a kiss.

You could pull her into you for a kiss, or if you are sitting next to her make deep eye contact, look at her lips, then her eyes again and go for a kiss.

The time for waiting has long past and you need to take action.

There is nothing else that I can say.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Sherlock-Holmes

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Could i just give her a peck on the cheek? lol.
 
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