"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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How to get into my "DJ" Mode

noodle

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How to get into Your "DJ" Mode

I don't know if this happens to you guys but it sure as hell does to me.
What I'm talking about is when you get all "Pumped" up for no reason, and when I'm like this I am more funny, charming, good with girls, social, etc. etc. :cool:

I call this the "DJ" mode, since its the characteristics of a Don Juan. This only happens to me sometimes. Like one day i'll wake up and i'll feel like a million bucks:up: , other days i'm just really lousy and not as sociable as I could be.:cuss:

When I am in this mode I have so much energy and I love it and people love me when I'm in it. When i'm like this I feel like the most popular guy in the school, everyone says hi to me in the halls, everyone talks to me when they see I am in this mode.


My question is, how do I stay in this mode? :confused:
And is there an explanation for the occurances of this?


I'm sure you guys have days like this, maybe you call it something else. Just wondering what you did to get into one of these "Happy" modes.
 
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"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Nexus Polaris

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I'd like to hear some opinions on this, too. I know exactly what you're talking about.

Some nights I'll be king of the bar from the moment I walk in. It's a busy night and everybody I know is there, and they're all happy to see me. I look like the biggest bigshot in the place, and as a result, I meet new people as well and usually go home with a phone number.

But it's never consistent. More often than not, I'll drag myself in there feeling like crap.
 

Stud No1

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its so true, i get this too

sometimes on 'on form' and feel the aura, those are the nights i get most of my pulls.

other times everything just isnt the same.

i realise why though. its all about vibes and inner confidence but its harder to control than it is to read about.

we obviously need to learn how to master our own minds
 

Crazy Asian

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same here man.

might it have something to do with the first experience of the day? what i mean is that maybe the outcome of the very first interaction you have of the day will determine how you think/act/feel the rest of the day?
 

playa99

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i think that its just your testosterone levels fluctuating, and what your confidence levels are like at that moment in time
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Tenzen

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ya i get the same thing, like yesterday i walked into a club all afcish.... but i manned up half way through. I seen lots of opportunity's, wasn't really taking them but when i did it turned out good because i got a number by the end of the night. =) I wasn't in my DJ mode but i didn't give up n pulled through on a ****ty day....
 

Maxtro

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Heh I'm never in DJ mode. My mood or whatever on a scale of 1-10, 10 being the best, I'm basically a 4 all the time. Right now I'm trying to think of things I can do or have that will make me happy.
 

noodle

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Crazy Asian said:
same here man.

might it have something to do with the first experience of the day? what i mean is that maybe the outcome of the very first interaction you have of the day will determine how you think/act/feel the rest of the day?
It might be that. Most mornings I wake up late, I'm rushed, stressed. I have a small or no breakfast. Most of those days I feel very tired and not in my DJ mode.
But other times, I crack a good joke in my first/second class and everyone laughs, I get pumped and that helps me get into the mode.

So I'm thinking its how you start your day off that effects this.

I'm going to experiment a little this week. Go to sleep early, wake up early, have a nice good breakfast, go for a run if the weather permits. Talk to everyone. See what happens. :up:

Stress can also be a major factor in this as well.



About that Reset AD thing. I wouldn't take medication just to help me get energized, to me thats just not healthy for the body and not "natural". But thats me.
 

Joe The Homophobe

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Basically just watch any Rodney Dangerfield movie which will show you how you should be. If you've seen his movies and the roles he played you see how he commands attention anywhere he goes, how he is fun to be around, how he acts crazy and you feel like he lives everyday like if it were his last. How he seems to exude energy. Just watch "back to school."

When I go sargin I go with this mentality. I try to act as crazy/fun as I possibly can. I laugh a lot, smile a lot, do crazy and say stupid things. I go all guns blazing style. I try to be as energetic and positive as I possibly can and make people feel like im some crazy fun guy they want to have around.

That is the fun side of the DJ. You also need to have a "romantic side." I like to listen to love songs (neil diamond/julio iglesias) so I can get into the mood of the guy that wants to make love to every beautiful woman he sees. You need to talk to her in a way that you are fun but also let her know you have a romantic side that you will make sweet love to her and make her yours.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Joe The Homophobe

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another 2 important things
1. Make sure you don't get sargin withdrawal. I went sargin today after not doing it for 2 weeks and I was horrible. Before the 2 weeks I was sargin 2-3 days a week and was on fire. You need to do this constantly to be on dj mode. This of course only applies to us non-professionals.
2. After my performance today and seeing how uptight and nervous I was after not doing this for 2 weeks, it would not hurt to try to drink a beer or 2 before sargin next time ;)
 

sandman6991

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It's strange...sometimes I'm like that...and sometimes I'm just tired and don't want to talk to anyone...
 

noodle

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Well I tried something today. I had a great breakfast, went to school early saw some people said hi and stuff.

I then met up with my friend ( who is AFCish, not that popular) and we walked around the school. Normally, I wouldn't say "Hi" to anyone I knew, I would just look straight ahead and keep walking.

But today, I started out by saying hi to a few people and then more and more and before I knew it I was nudging people, giving high fives and getting hugs from girls.

I was on fire, I felt so great not only because I felt like the coolest guy in the school, but my AFC friend also thought that I was the coolest guy around. It felt great! I went to classes full of positive energy, saying hi to everyone in the class, asking about their weekend and bringing up topics like the recent school dance and b-ball game. Lots of people joined in on the convo, even the teacher!! :D

It WAS GREAT! And btw, i'm not really that popular, I just started saying hi to everyone and meeting new people. I guess my energy kinda just drew them towards me.


So tomorow, try it. Think positive, have a great nutriontional breakfast have a great attitude towards everything. Say "Hi" to whoever you make eye contact with, ask them about their day, show them that you care. They will treat you back with respect and look up to you, and will like you more.
Then you will truly feel good! :up:

So Try it! Be Positive! :up:
 

Interceptor

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The "state" you guys are referrign to is an Emotional State. In whcih you observe and respond without calcualtion and just "let yoursefl go."
Basicvally, letting go of inhobitions, censoring, and edit and over analyzing things.

If you can step back and get used to being objective, and non outcome dependent, you can maintain that state more continuously.
You also have to make sure you never go in seeking approval, or acceptance from females.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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noodle

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Interceptor said:
The "state" you guys are referrign to is an Emotional State. In whcih you observe and respond without calcualtion and just "let yoursefl go."
Basicvally, letting go of inhobitions, censoring, and edit and over analyzing things.

If you can step back and get used to being objective, and non outcome dependent, you can maintain that state more continuously.
You also have to make sure you never go in seeking approval, or acceptance from females.
Yea that explains it too. I kinda just noticed that.
 

Prodigy746

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WOW! I know exactuly what you are talking about. Sometime i am happy laughing talking to strangers, not afraid to go up to any girl and ask for number. Other tims i am tried dont feel like talking to any girls or meeting any new people. I wish i knew how to stay in a good mood all the time.. that would be awesome. Most of the numbers i got was when i was in good mood and it always seems that i am in good when i start my day with my close friends and we talk laugh and stuff than rest of the day goes very well.
 

Interceptor

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Being in a "good mood" is a DECISION.

Really. That's all it is.
 

condorator

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i have experienced the same thing. i think Interceptor is definitely right ... BUT for those times it's hard to keep your stuff straight i find that a run in the morning (or whenever) gets the endorphins flowing and will generally put me in a much more relaxed state (even if this is partly placebo). i've read that Capsaicin (the chemical that induces spiciness - so anything that's spicey) apparently triggers a release of endorphins. now i'm not saying it actually works, but even if you think trick yourself into thinking it works, it'll probably have some effects.
 
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