"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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how to emotionally detach and be a pua

Mr.Fantastic

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I am beginning to get good at picking up women. I like doing it, and I enjoy the sex but when the 'relationship' ends, as it will, I kind of feel slightly emotionally involved, kind of like the lesser pain of splitting from a girlfriend.

To give you an example, I met a girl from America in a bar, she was an exchange student, so I took her out for a few weeks, we had an awesome time, enjoyed her company, then she went back to America. I knew it was going to happen, so i'm not really sad or hurt, just feel a bit funny.

Recently I met another girl, took her out a few times, great sex, now i'm getting the old 'not answering my call bit, which is obviously blowing me out in the same way we blow girls out. Feel a bit weird about that too.

It's strange, on the one hand I don't want a serious relationship with these girls, and I want to sleep with lots of women, but at the same time I really like these girls and miss them when it's over...kind of.


Does anybody else feel like this?
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Scars

Master Don Juan
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Yeah, I get this way sometimes too. It usually doesn't happen to ONS, but if I invest any decent amount of time with a girl (like a couple of weeks) I do feel somewhat attached, especially after sex. It's best if you both know the situation and realize that it won't get past a certain point. Unfortunately for a few girls, I failed to give them the notice. I don't really have any solid advice, because I kind of suffer from this as well, what I usually do is replace the feelings with another girl.
 

thefonz

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That sounds completely normal to me. Why would you ever want to emotionally detach yourself from people you invest in?

Maybe your asking the wrong question. Emotional detachment is not glamorous by any means.
 

Mr.Fantastic

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fonz, you make a very good point...how on earth are we to pick up all the women that we want to and not feel bad? or is this feeling a natural curse that goes with the game?
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Chipleader

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The question you really need to ask yourself is: Do you really want to be a PUA?
 
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