How to deal with female HR manager?

[El Payaso]

She's overtly flirting with me, constant touching and comments. Yesterday, I was talking with a coworker about a movie I wanted to see this weekend and she jumped in saying she wanted to see it with me. I had to deflect. She's attractive but I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot poll. Why?

1) She's in HR.

2) She's a co-worker.

3) She's in HR.

4) Her father is a higher up.

5) She's in HR.

Any ideas on how to get her to stop?

 

[SmooveMooves]

You can't get her to stop. If you simply tell her to stop she'll get angry she was rejected and make your work experience hell. If your unreceptive she'll do the same.

When she flirts, remain slightly receptive and ambiguous but let it end there. After a while, one or two things will happen:

1. She'll becone uninterested because you haven't made a move.

2. She'll make the move herself in which you reject by saying that 'you'd love too, but can't because of her position'.

That way, you rejected her because of her position and she won't have a reason to be hold resent. Also creating a forbidden dynamic, so if you ever wanted to hit that and ruin your job, you could quite easily be able to.

 

[dustmuffin]

Act like a beta to run her off

 

[wifehunter]

Play dumb. Be nice but, be naive to her advances. I do this with ladies I'm not interested in.

Another one... let her know, she reminds you of your sister.

next time she comments.... say thanks for reminding me, it's been awhile since I've seen my sister.

 

[Atom Smasher]

Yes, ambiguity is the best tactic here. She'll still start treating you like a leper once she loses interest because she will still perceive it as a rejection, but it's better than a hard rejection.

 

[GeniuzKhrist]

Why the **** do you need advice if you already said you would't touch her with a ten foot pole? I mean we could all pitch in and donate and get you a 20ft pole, but I don't care for you that much.

 

[Bible_Belt]

Rejection is a frame. Your frame should be that you really like her too, but you just don't date co-workers. Isn't that sad? It's Lifetime movie stuff. It's a rejection that makes her hug you and cry and love you forever.

 

[Dingo]

Tell her your gay...

She's HR and her pop is higher up... Don't envy you.

 

[Serenity]

No tactic needed, just continue showing your disinterest. Maybe even just tell her straight up you don't want to mix up your private life with the professional.

 

[Lozboss]

Use the Professional/Personal barrier.

Tease her: "I'd love to but what would people say if I was seen out with HR" and smirk.

 

[Yewki]

Your frame should be that you really like her too, but you just don't date co-workers. Isn't that sad? It's Lifetime movie stuff. It's a rejection that makes her hug you and cry and love you forever.

I don't think letting her know that you "really like" her is wise. It might encourage her to flirt more, and it's basically opening the door for feelings to escalate and then some type of situation to unfold at work.

 

[Serenity]

Use the Professional/Personal barrier.

Tease her: "I'd love to but what would people say if I was seen out with HR" and smirk.

Uhm, he's actually trying to drive her away, teasing with a smirk would be the opposite...