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How to "break in" to a new scene?

BPH

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I'm in Wilmington, which is close to Philadelphia.

Philadelphia is supposedly a lot more fun in terms of nightlife than Wilmington, but it is also a good bit further away and more expensive.

I would like to test the waters and see if it's somewhere I'd want to think about moving to. The thing is, the only times I've been out there have been with my ex, so I don't know the spots that are good or bad.

I might have some fraternity buddies living up there, but I'm not sure who/how to find out who, and I don't have friends living up there where I can spend the night. Considering the 40-ish minute drive to get there, and considering the fact that I'd most likely NOT be sober by the end of the night, I'm wondering how to reasonably go out up there and find out if it's a scene I'd like to be part of.

I'm working on my finances and not going out much here, but I still need some sort of outlet to not end up on long dry spells; Newark is college but they're really mid this year, Trolley Square is ok but it's a dudefest with maybe 1 or 2 hot needles in the haystack hidden in deep in the bar, and just about everything else is a small, low-key, late 30s or older spot.

TL;DR how to explore a faraway nightlife scene when you don't have a group of friends to go with/a place to stay overnight?
 

BillyPilgrim

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Do you have a fave music genre that you like or are knowledgeable enough to immerse yourself in? In San Diego back in the day we had a punk scene, rockabilly scene, reggae scene, etc and dudes would use that as an identity to find friends & get laid. You gotta look the part to some degree unless it's something more mainstream like blues, jazz, or r&b but for something niche there's more immersion required.
 

SW15

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Is Wilmington viable for seduction longer term? Wilmington doesn't have a big population but New Castle County has a population of 570,000. A population base of 570,000 is usually good enough.

I would imagine the biggest problem for Wilmington is that it sits in the shadow of Philadelphia. Most singles near your age would want to be in Philadelphia instead of Northern Delaware (only 30-40 miles away).

You might have to make the decision to move to Philadelphia and go on with your life.
 

BeExcellent

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Plan a couple of weekends and get an Air B n B. Google the type scene or activities you are into. Philly can be sketch in places so get a place to stay where its not dicey. You can probably catch the train up.
 

BillyPilgrim

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Is Wilmington viable for seduction longer term? Wilmington doesn't have a big population but New Castle County has a population of 570,000. A population base of 570,000 is usually good enough.

I would imagine the biggest problem for Wilmington is that it sits in the shadow of Philadelphia. Most singles near your age would want to be in Philadelphia instead of Northern Delaware (only 30-40 miles away).

You might have to make the decision to move to Philadelphia and go on with your life.
The problem with that area (DC up to Philly) is that the women are uglier than average. So Wilmington actually may not be big enough, and philly even might be no bueno if OP has other geographical options outside of it.

 

BPH

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The problem with that area (DC up to Philly) is that the women are uglier than average. So Wilmington actually may not be big enough, and philly even might be no bueno if OP has other geographical options outside of it.

It might not be, but that's what I'm wanting to find out because there ain't s*** here...

In my day-to-day between work and the gym, I don't see any attractive women, so I have to go out of my way. I'm fine with that, I just don't want to waste my time at crappy venues, like Trolley.
 

Bingo-Player

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Working on your finances and dry spells go hand in hand unfortunatley

I went about 4-5 months last year without so much as a fondle of pu$$y

You cant really do both at the same time , women take a massive amount of mental energy especially when you are approaching them from a poor position / weak frame

Suck it up bury your head and focus on yourself
 

SW15

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there ain't s*** here...

In my day-to-day between work and the gym, I don't see any attractive women, so I have to go out of my way. I'm fine with that, I just don't want to waste my time at crappy venues
There are places in the United States (and globally) that are pussie wastelands. Most metro areas with a population of less than 150,000 - 200,000 are total pussie wastelands. Area population of around 150,000 - 200,000 or so is around the minimum when an area becomes viable to date as a 25+ year old working stage of life guy.

Wilmington itself is under 150,000 but New Castle County has a population of 570,000. In terms of raw numbers, 570,000 seems like enough selection in an area. Every market is different and you know Wilmington and Northern Delaware better than I do. You've determine that there ain't shiit in the Wilmington, DE at your stage of life. You are 29, 6'0"+ and are physically fit. You are strong on looks, which has propelled you to a 90+ notch count.

You are not strong on money and status as a 29 year old guy who lives with his parents in the shadow of a major city. However, Roosh was once in his early 30s crashing in his dad's basement getting pussie in a Maryland suburb of Washington DC. It can be done.

The biggest thing for you is that if you move to a bigger market like Philadelphia, the male competition gets more intense. There are "big fish, small pond" guys out there who do reasonably well in mid-sized metros of roughly 250,000 - 700,000. I have heard of times when unmarried men declined a move to a bigger market for lifestyle reasons (including dating but usually considering more than just dating) and stayed in a mid-sized metro because they were more comfortable there. I think their overall situations were likely better than yours.

Moving to Philadelphia might be your better option than staying in Wilmington. You are 6'0"+ with a good physique. That plays well on the swipe apps and even in the bars.

The problem with that area (DC up to Philly) is that the women are uglier than average. So Wilmington actually may not be big enough, and philly even might be no bueno if OP has other geographical options outside of it.
I've not spent much time in that area. There are 3 major cities with DC, Baltimore, and Philadelphia. None of them are well known for attractive women. DC tends to attract careerist type women, including boring governmental drone type chicks. Roosh and Heartiste used to talk a lot about DC women in the late 2000s to mid 2010s. I don't know much of a stereotype of Baltimore and Philadelphia women.
 

ManFromTartarus

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Philly, a great place for a cheesesteak, the last place I'd go to meet women.
If I were you I'd look at other options. Do some traveling.

On a side note I don't know why DC gets a bad rap, I spent a few years there and found the women to be much higher quality than the surrounding cities. That was a long time ago so maybe it fell off.
 

BPH

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Philly, a great place for a cheesesteak, the last place I'd go to meet women.
If I were you I'd look at other options. Do some traveling.

On a side note I don't know why DC gets a bad rap, I spent a few years there and found the women to be much higher quality than the surrounding cities. That was a long time ago so maybe it fell off.
Well Philly is a little more than a half hour from me while DC is 2+ hours.

Politically, it's extremely liberal, and when I was seeing my acting/modeling agent there to work on my monologue I would see all manner of weirdos walking the street; rainbow-colored hair, wearing masks post-COVID, dressed as furries or anime protagonists, etc...

I would use the swipe apps if I arrived early to my appointment and the quality of woman was what I expected, given the above statements.

I don't know which is better these days, but Philly is the only realistic option of the two, and it might not be "good", but I want to see if it's better than where I'm at.
 
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