"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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how to be when around ex gf

Heretolearn

Master Don Juan
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You should not have to 'act' but reality is different.

Especially when they make such an effort to be friends.

Those who say act normal, what is that?
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Cruise

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How about acting like you actually carried on with your life ever since the breakup?

Don't go about tooting your own horn... even a quiet confidence should work if you communicate it right.

But, what're you trying to accomplish? Do you want her back, or do you want to be friends, or just make her plain out regret not staying with you? Each answer, I assume, would yield different ways of 'BEING', I guess... and consequently, whatever answer you have only serves to reveal your true character in the process.

So, the question is, in reality: Who are you now?
 

Rollo Tomassi

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There's a reason ex-girlfriends are called Exs - Because they're no longer your girlfriend. Sweet Mother Mary, this isn't brain surgery! You should be far less concerned with "how you should be" around your Ex and more concerned with how YOU want to be of your own accord. Why are you even "around your Ex" at all?

Leave it alone and concentrate on what makes you better in the now. Go out and sarge and remember all the reasons you aren't with your Ex in the first place. The amount of time and effort you put into concocting stupid masks for yourself is time better spent on actually making yourself someone better quality women will want to become associated with.
 

Desdinova

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The problem with many guys here is they've learned to be "in fear" of their ex-gfs. Whenever they encounter an ex, they automatically become afraid of having an encounter with them.

What they need to do is combat that fear and see her for what she really is: A woman who no longer has control over his life. When you realize this, you take back the power that she took from you, and her presence no longer phases you.

That's when you walk up to her, say hi, have some small talk, and then leave to go about your business. Just don't have second thoughts about getting back together with her. She's an ex for a reason.
 

resilient

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I'd be indifferent to any interaction. You've hopefully got your own life back together, so she shouldn't even be able to cause you to sweat a drop on her behalf! :cool:
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Good_ol_boy

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Be civil to her, as you would to any acquaintance---no more, no less!
 
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