"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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How to avoid negative association?

xsmagic

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Attraction is simple, it comes naturally with practice. However "negative association" and "emotional tampon" seem to be completely different.

Whenever my girlfriend has family problems or whatnot, of course she comes to me. I learned that I should just agree with whatever and try not to make suggestions, to avoid conflict when she's in a bad mood. But still I feel she associates those negative feelings with me and that I become an emotional tampon at the same time.

How do I NOT end up as the bad guy or the emotional tampon whenever my gf wants to rant or cry on my shoulder?
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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GetOveIT

Don Juan
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a friend and lover is something that you cant do.

Chose.
 

GetOveIT

Don Juan
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xsmagic said:
so a gf is something you can't do?
Your girlfriend is using you as a emotional tampon, that means youre more a friend than a lover.


I dumped my gf because of that.
 
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