"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

Read more...

How to act drunk when you are sober

DannyOcean

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 10, 2003
Messages
66
Reaction score
0
So I'm back in the world of being single after a 4 year LTR and for the most part it's going pretty well. The one thing I've noticed though lately is that my game when I've been drinking is pretty good and when I haven't been is not all that hot. The obvious solution would be to drink but that's not what I want to do. I don't mind going out and having a beer or two but I hate the feeling that I need to have six beers in me to be ready to go.

I'm wondering what ways y'all have found to make a radically positive state change. Essentially how to get in the same state you are when you have some drinks in you without actually having those drinks. I'd love to hear any thoughts on this but I know many guys go out sarging and do remarkably well without any alcohol. That's where I want to get to!
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

Bvbidd

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 16, 2006
Messages
1,482
Reaction score
8
Mabye try hitting yourself on the head? lol
 

Francisco d'Anconia

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 10, 2003
Messages
15,481
Reaction score
65
Location
Galt's Gulch
Contrary to popular belief, you could use NLP to make the necessary adjustment.
 

Slevin

Don Juan
Joined
May 29, 2006
Messages
183
Reaction score
1
Francisco d'Anconia said:
Contrary to popular belief, you could use NLP to make the necessary adjustment.
I've seen lots of references to NLP and it's gotten me curious, is there any books, cd's or whatever that you would recommend?
 

DannyOcean

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 10, 2003
Messages
66
Reaction score
0
Thanks for response guys. I'll second Slevin's question...how could this be achieved through NLP?
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

Read more...

Francisco d'Anconia

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 10, 2003
Messages
15,481
Reaction score
65
Location
Galt's Gulch
There's tons of books on the subject on Amazon.com or you can check the Psychology/Self Help sections of your local bookseller.

I don't know any of the new 'entry level' books but Anthony Robbins (yep, the Lurch looking guy that has made people able to walk fire pits during his seminars) is one of the first people actually certified as a NLP practitioner. His popular books "Unlimited Power" and "Awaken the Giant Within" are both based on NLP concepts. Even though they are about 20 years old, they are very sound if you are receptive to accepting a different way to perceive things.
 

KarmaSutra

Banned
Joined
Oct 13, 2005
Messages
4,818
Reaction score
142
Age
53
Location
Padron Reserve maduro in hand while finishing my b
Slevin said:
I've seen lots of references to NLP and it's gotten me curious, is there any books, cd's or whatever that you would recommend?

Richard Bandler wrote a great book entitled Frogs into Princes . I've heard you can download loads of NLP info using "illegal" filesharing programs . . .

Kenrick Cleveland has some stuff worthy of a mention as well. Look for his Dark Side patterns e-book. It's insightful.
 

DannyOcean

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 10, 2003
Messages
66
Reaction score
0
Thanks guys. I'm pretty familiar with Tony's work. In fact, one of his tape programs he even talks about using NLP to do exactly what I was asking originally. However, he doesn't go into details about it unfortunately...

I'm definitely going to look into NLP further. I tend to learning better through watching and/or listening so maybe I can find some audios or videos or take a class somewhere. Anyone have any suggestions?
 

Francisco d'Anconia

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 10, 2003
Messages
15,481
Reaction score
65
Location
Galt's Gulch
DannyOcean said:
Thanks guys. I'm pretty familiar with Tony's work. In fact, one of his tape programs he even talks about using NLP to do exactly what I was asking originally. However, he doesn't go into details about it unfortunately...

I'm definitely going to look into NLP further. I tend to learning better through watching and/or listening so maybe I can find some audios or videos or take a class somewhere. Anyone have any suggestions?
Go to your local library. They should have a ton of his work on tape or CD. I think his presentations are pretty good and easier to first comprehend. You can always pick up his books afterward for the unabridged version.
 

DannyOcean

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 10, 2003
Messages
66
Reaction score
0
I just ordered Frogs Into Princes and will look around for some more NLP stuff. I think some sort of trigger or anchoring would be useful. Anyone do any of that to build confidence in social situations?
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

wheelin&dealin

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 10, 2002
Messages
1,924
Reaction score
6
Location
Vancouver, BC
DannyOcean said:
So I'm back in the world of being single after a 4 year LTR and for the most part it's going pretty well. The one thing I've noticed though lately is that my game when I've been drinking is pretty good and when I haven't been is not all that hot. The obvious solution would be to drink but that's not what I want to do. I don't mind going out and having a beer or two but I hate the feeling that I need to have six beers in me to be ready to go.

I'm wondering what ways y'all have found to make a radically positive state change. Essentially how to get in the same state you are when you have some drinks in you without actually having those drinks. I'd love to hear any thoughts on this but I know many guys go out sarging and do remarkably well without any alcohol. That's where I want to get to!
I haven't drank in years and my pick-up game is pretty damn good. You need 1) a bigger set of testicles to approach sober 2) Good conversation skills & 3) motivation. All of them can be improved.
 

Ratisson

Don Juan
Joined
Oct 22, 2003
Messages
187
Reaction score
1
Location
canada
i think all u have to do is just do one approach to break the ice. Whenever im clubbing and i wanna go grind a chick on the D floor, the first grind is so hard to do, but if i gather up the balls to do it, grinding other chicks after my first one is a hell of a lot easier. Same goes for cold approaches.
 

DannyOcean

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 10, 2003
Messages
66
Reaction score
0
I think an immediate approach is probably a huge part of that. Once I've done one approach the rest of them become incredibly easy. I almost get "drunk" off that high feeling I get of approaching that first girl (regardless of the outcome). I can't remember who it was about having a mentality of approaching "first set on the right" whenever you enter a new place but I think that's pretty much right on the mark.
 

Bonhomme

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 2, 2002
Messages
3,956
Reaction score
16
Location
Land of the Ruins
Upon reading the thread title, my first thought was: why act drunk when you're sober? But I see you're really talking about something entirely different. False advertising. :p

That's a toughie. I have the opposite problem in that even one drink impairs my judgment enough to make my "game" worse. Best thing I can think of is to just go out and do it, and your comfort level will improve with time. Doing something like dancing and/or going to concerts where you get in a bit of a state could loosen you up a bit, and get the flow going.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

Top