Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
If it's an order, what do you say to her? If she goes, "Get the door" for example.Warrior74 said:After having an ex who would hardly lift a finger much less wash a dish....its hard for to do little things, UNLESS they ask in a nice manner. If it's an order, I will ignore it.
I have a bad habit of giving them a blank stare until they restate in the form of a question....if they give me attitude, I'll ask em "who do you think your talking to?". They can dig the hole deeper from there if they want to. I can walk away.2.0 said:Thanks for all of the advice. I guess you're right that it wouldn't hurt if she does things for you too.
If it's an order, what do you say to her? If she goes, "Get the door" for example.