How Quick Are You To Drop A Girl?

[soulforge]

If your dating a very HOT girl and she is displaying red flags..

Rude, or bad attitude.. or maybe manipulative!


How quick are you to drop her? How many chances before you think b@tch has to go?

 

[Von]

As soon as possible

The longer you wait the more attached/used/damaged you become

 

[wifehunter]

Red flags like that, could be testing.

Dropping her will pass her test, if it's a test.

But, if the red flags continue... She gets kicked to the curb.

 

[sazc]

drop
u cant save or change anyone. the way they treat you IS going to be the way they treat you
if you want to be treated well, move on from the a$$holes that dont treat you well

 

[devilkingx2]

drop a girl the second she gets on your nerves, 99% of them don't have anything so valuable that you need to put up with anything

 

[soulforge]

So do you feel like giving a girl atleast two changes?

Don't you think dropping someone at first fuk up is over drastic

 

[sazc]

So do you feel like giving a girl atleast two changes?

Don't you think dropping someone at first fuk up is over drastic

after your last LTR do you really want to give any female a second chance?
Here's the thing...if a person is being an a$$ and treating you poorly, the ONLY way I would ever consider giving them a second chance is if I communicated to them "I wont put up with being treated that way" and they didn't try to defend or dismiss my communication. If they seem to understand what I am saying and where I am coming from, and are agreeable, then okay, let's try again.

If you say nothing about how you feel disrespected, the behavior WILL occur again - if only because you appeared to have put up with it before, so there's 'nothing wrong' as far as the other person knows.

This is why it is very important for all you DJ's looking for females to eventually LTR (plates or exclusive) to learn to speak to the females you are seeing. practice telling them what your needs, are and watch how they take the information. The submissive and respectful female is going to listen, understand and respond positively. Any other reaction from a female means you shouldn't waste real space on the chick. At the very least you get to practice your communication skills, and become less afraid at communicating on that level.

 

[Bible_Belt]

Everyone gets one text out of me. If they don't answer, I'm done, or at least done texting until I hear back from them. If a girl hasn't responded to my last message, I am not going to message her again. That's the most directly a woman is ever going to tell you that she is not interested.

 

[soulforge]

I have come to the stage, where i would only give her the one chance..

I agree with Sazc point.. i believe its important to let that female know, that her behaviour is not acceptable

If she takes this criticism well, and takes on board what you have communicated to her, then a second chance is worth it...

If she reacts badly to your crictism of her behaviour.. then she is not worth keeping around.. her behaviour will not change, as she does not have the ability to see her own wrong doings..

Walk away!

 

[QuadDeuces]

If she shows drama and disrespect early on during the first few dates you can only be thankful and make a swift clean exit.
It's more difficult if she turns into a witch later on.

 

[soulforge]

If she shows drama and disrespect early on during the first few dates you can only be thankful and make a swift clean exit.
It's more difficult if she turns into a witch later on.

If she turns into a witch later on.. again if she does not react well to your criticism of her behaviour.. harder as it maybe.. you still have to drop her and walk away

 

[GunShow85]

This is a great topic- how do you act on red flags with an otherwise great girl?

Let's say you finally meet someone that is hot/fun/smart/educated/classy/etc (which I think is rare)... it's hard to dismiss and leave simply based on red flags.

IMO - there are varying degrees of red flags and should be dealt with accordingly.

Mild red flags:
Tattoo
Parties
Divorced parents
Talks bad about ex

Red Flags:
Lots of guy friends
Too quick to talk love, marriage, etc
Hot/Cold

Major red flags:
Small lies
Flakes
Disrespect
High number count
Drugs

I think it is hard to next an otherwise hot/cool girl because they come along rarely. But frankly if a girl is hot/cool but still single after college, there is probably a reason (if she was perfect, some guy already take her).

Kudos to guys who are strong enough to dismiss hotties for minor red flags. I think this is right 90% of the time but no one is perfect and if you're too picky might never find someone. I have a few friends with successful marriages to girls that displayed mild red flags (divorced parents, tattoos, not religious, party). But for the most part red flags are for a reason and your gut is right.

Curious how many guys have nexted HB9+ for small red flags?

 

[dude99]

If your dating a very HOT girl and she is displaying red flags..

Rude, or bad attitude.. or maybe manipulative!


How quick are you to drop her? How many chances before you think b@tch has to go?

Rude and bad attitude is grounds for immediate dismisal. If she is this way in the beginning imagine how she will be when her interest plummets

 

[Angle Fire]

Let her know that she is being disrespectful but be polite about it, don't attack her. Make sure that you know your boundaries and allow a girl to play games with you. Examine why she is being this way, could it be something that offended her that you might have said or done. Or is she just spoiled. If you like her be patient, give her some room to make some minor mistakes, if she responds maturely, forgive.

 

[soulforge]

Let her know that she is being disrespectful but be polite about it, don't attack her. Make sure that you know your boundaries and allow a girl to play games with you. Examine why she is being this way, could it be something that offended her that you might have said or done. Or is she just spoiled. If you like her be patient, give her some room to make some minor mistakes, if she responds maturely, forgive.

What if she does not respond maturely?? Instead negatively or defensive of her behavior

 

[devilkingx2]

So do you feel like giving a girl atleast two changes?

Don't you think dropping someone at first fuk up is over drastic

depends on their **** ups relative to their upsides.

if they fvck up hugely relative to doing almost nothing for you then it makes sense to drop them after their first mistake.

if they fvck up hugely, but are otherwise fantastic, a second or third chance is warranted, so long as they don't squander it and you make them work for it.

 

[9Volt]

after your last LTR do you really want to give any female a second chance?
Here's the thing...if a person is being an a$$ and treating you poorly, the ONLY way I would ever consider giving them a second chance is if I communicated to them "I wont put up with being treated that way" and they didn't try to defend or dismiss my communication. If they seem to understand what I am saying and where I am coming from, and are agreeable, then okay, let's try again.

If you say nothing about how you feel disrespected, the behavior WILL occur again - if only because you appeared to have put up with it before, so there's 'nothing wrong' as far as the other person knows.

This is why it is very important for all you DJ's looking for females to eventually LTR (plates or exclusive) to learn to speak to the females you are seeing. practice telling them what your needs, are and watch how they take the information. The submissive and respectful female is going to listen, understand and respond positively. Any other reaction from a female means you shouldn't waste real space on the chick. At the very least you get to practice your communication skills, and become less afraid at communicating on that level.

Exactly what I do. I'll simply bring up the behavior I don't agree with twice at most. If it continues I simply give them enough rope to hang themselves with and drop them. As in no talking, no investing any further at all. No text, email, calls nothing. Leave, learn and grow in a positive direction from the situation. One time I tried to ignore my own advice simply to test myself that I wasn't the issue in dismissing people too quickly that I knew were exhibiting toxic traits. Proved myself correct and finally dropped the last one and kept it moving.

 

[taiyuu_otoko]

What if she does not respond maturely?? Instead negatively or defensive of her behavior

Basic rules of assertive behavior.

"I don't like it when you do X." If she responds in a way you don't like, simply next her. Zero reason to tell her why, or explain why she's "wrong" and you're "right." Just end it at the soonest possible time.

Of course, this is tough to do based on many variables (how many other options you have, whether or not you've had sex, how hot she is, how big of a "violation" it is, etc).

This is why shopping for ladies ain't nearly as easy as shopping for shoes.

 

[bigneil]

Very fast in the first three months, then progressively slower. Very hard to do after a year or so.

Yes, in the first 3 months, you have one foot out the door. After that, you hold on to her hand as if she is dangling from the Empire State Building.

 

[bigneil]

What if she does not respond maturely?? Instead negatively or defensive of her behavior

Cut her some slack if she does things right after making a mistake. Reward good behavior and ignore bad behavior.