How our own Mothers turn us into wussy AFCs

[rgeere]

I found this article and nearly puked that there are parents that encourage their children to be looked down upon by other people.

I hope my mother didn't raise me that way, but if she did I don't remember it thank God.

http://www.christian-mommies.com/co...ogant-antidote-humility-graciousness-modesty/

Look at these quotes at the bottom... Makes me feel sick...

And the sad part is that is what this article considers healthy self-esteeme! To admit that someone is better than you and that you can't bypass them!!!!

"Jessica, I know how proud you must feel about your grades. I'm proud of how hard you worked. I also appreciate that you just told Dad and me and didn't call all your friends this time."

"Jeremy, I heard how you commented on how much more Dr. Hallowell knows than you do about migrating butterflies. I remember when you claimed to be the world's foremost authority."…

 

[Celadus]

Good god. That is the most frightening thing I have ever read.

My mom is my biggest fan.

Between this article and the Democratic Convention, I'm convinced the world is going to hell. If everyone was like me, we would not have any problems.

 

[California Love]

Eh. I totally support the charitable efforts of the Christian church, but some of their philisophies are totally out of sync with modern society. Kids should be diciplined though. A good wack here n there is good for character .

 

[Elfynne]

I think it's possible to find a happy medium in this case. It's wonderful and healthy to feel good about yourself, but neither is it good to think you're God's gift to humankind. Besides, if a person has true self-confidence and self-esteem, he or she will not feel that intense need to show other people how "superior" they are.

That's one thing I never understood while reading some of the messages here. Many seem to think that women swarm around ****y, over-confident guys like bees to honey. Maybe that's true in many cases. But I'll tell you what I would do...if I met some conceited peacock who thinks he's too good for me, I'd cut that prick down like grass. I'd slam him but good. Not in a physically aggressive way, of course...I would just (verbally) tell him what a piece of scum he is. And I would do the same if a woman acted that way toward me. There is nothing that pisses me off so much as arrogant people who act like they $hit diamonds or something. I've had to put up with many people like this, and I'm pretty damn sick of it. If they think they are better than me, they can kiss my a$$ after I rub their faces in the dirt. I HATE people who give themselves airs.

Sorry if I offended anyone with my language. I'm just venting.

 

[rgeere]

Elflynne:

I think that the true purpose of ****y/funny isn't to degrade or make anyone feel bad it is to help those who have trouble with women find confidence in themselves by thinking very positively of themselves. A person who is passive by nature can not find a goodmiddle ground until they have ventured to the other extreeme, which is what ****y/funny tries to do, but in a POSITIVE way.

 

[Elfynne]

Originally posted by rgeere
Elflynne:

I think that the true purpose of ****y/funny isn't to degrade or make anyone feel bad it is to help those who have trouble with women find confidence in themselves by thinking very positively of themselves. A person who is passive by nature can not find a goodmiddle ground until they have ventured to the other extreeme, which is what ****y/funny tries to do, but in a POSITIVE way.

Okay, and that's a good thing. I'm glad to hear it.

What I was talking about are those people, both male AND female, who visibly put themselves on a ladder above others. Most of those I went to high school with are this type. The girls looked down their noses at me because I was a shy eccentric who didn't wear makeup or fashionable clothes, and the guys scorned me for the same reason, but also because I didn't give a damn what they thought of me. I remember how that feels, and as a result have NO toleration for people who act that way toward me now. NO ONE has the right to think they are above anyone else. And I'm sure you'll agree with me.

 

[rgeere]

Elfynne. I think you are angry because others have failed to regard you as a worthy individual, which is why you come to these forums and why you question the intentions and thought patterns of men because you want to understand what it is you have to do in relation to what others are doing. You don't know so you learn and learn and learn about the psychology in hopes that you will one day be successful with the opposite sex yourself.

I am saying this as a personality type.

Now, you do appear to be a rather balanced girl in your approach. Atleast this is apparent in what I have read in your writting style. In person you could be totally diffrent, so I don't know. But I think you are searching for what's healthy emotionally.

 

[Elfynne]

Yes, I'd say you are correct in your deductions. I have much less experience than most other women my age, and I seem to read social cues the wrong way. I suppose I just want to be like everyone else. Everyone wants acceptance from his/her peers. I have always been a little different, which is both a source of pride AND embarrassment for me. This "eccentricity" that I have goes way back into my childhood, even before high school.

I'm glad that I'm not a carbon copy of everyone else, but I would naturally like to have the acceptance and respect from others that I deserve.

I bet people who are reading this think I'm some ugly, pimple-faced geek with braces and coke bottle-thick glasses.

 

[#1 P.I.M.P.]

My mom tries that kinda **** on me. The thing is I'm way too C/F to hear any of it and besides the way she wants me to be is the way I used to be that just got me steped on. Shed say somthing like don't get to full of yourself and become selfish like your dad and Id be like so what u trying to say that's what I am now *with a smile* then I'd say that u gotta look out for #1 no body else gonna do it better than u cept maybee god . The funny thing the exact thing she dosn't want me to be is exactly what my dad is he's a good DJ, DJ's and my mom don't even know it, Altho she caught a hint, so hard evidence tho. SO if she fell for it and she know that's what "women want" then what is she gonna expect me to do be a **** plucker the rest of my life.

 

[#1 P.I.M.P.]

One more thing. Instead of they study how to bring up those with low self esteem's they anna interfer with those with too much. Their problem is alot smaller and can be fixed.

 

[rgeere]

Originally posted by Elfynne

I bet people who are reading this think I'm some ugly, pimple-faced geek with braces and coke bottle-thick glasses.

The last girl I knew with your personality type wasn't bad looking, but I'm also very selective.

Post a picture of yourself if you are not shy of doing that.

 

[Elfynne]

Originally posted by rgeere
The last girl I knew with your personality type wasn't bad looking, but I'm also very selective.

Post a picture of yourself if you are not shy of doing that.

HAHAHA.....well, I'M very selective, too! And I believe I made it clear when I first came here that I am not looking to "pick up" any guys here. You sound like a great guy, Rgeere, but it isn't my intention to attract you or anybody else on this forum. Posting my picture would be like I'm begging for approval from anyone here who looks at it. And, as I'm sure you well know by now, I have too much pride to do something stupid like that.

Besides, I couldn't do it even if I wanted to, because I don't have a scanner. I know, I know...I'm behind the times.

 

[rgeere]

You sound like a great guy, Rgeere, but it isn't my intention to attract you or anybody else on this forum.

That's a classy rejection that has not only been documented, but is entirely open to you changing your opinion if in fact you do find someone that attracts you and that could even be tommorow or in the next few minutes, so please spare me the obvious. I've seen it all before.

I typically mean what I say, and I was asking for your picture with no promises in response to your comment about others thinking you were unattractive with pimples. As a typical female you read right into what I wrote. As a typical male I asked for no more than what I have written.

 

[Ever onward]

HAHAHA.....well, I'M very selective, too! And I believe I made it clear when I first came here that I am not looking to "pick up" any guys here. You sound like a great guy, Rgeere, but it isn't my intention to attract you or anybody else on this forum.

Hey rgeere she's only here to use us for our minds. I'm sure she's a hottie. Anyways her personality sure is attractive....

 

[Elfynne]

Originally posted by rgeere
That's a classy rejection that has not only been documented, but is entirely open to you changing your opinion if in fact you do find someone that attracts you and that could even be tommorow or in the next few minutes, so please spare me the obvious. I've seen it all before.

I typically mean what I say, and I was asking for your picture with no promises in response to your comment about others thinking you were unattractive with pimples. As a typical female you read right into what I wrote. As a typical male I asked for no more than what I have written.

Whoa, whoa, whoa! Who am I rejecting?! I get the feeling you're upset. Why should you be? You've never even met me, and I've never even met you. I didn't insult or "reject" you, so don't take it that way. Gosh.

Besides, I've seen how the people here are. They rate women on their looks...HB7, HB9, 10...and it's obvious that they pick apart every little detail of a woman's appearance. They are hyper-critical. I'm not going to post my picture just so they can rate me and pick me apart as if I was some statue on exhibit. I think it would be much wiser, for the sake of my own dignity, NOT to post my picture. And I made it clear that I didn't come here to look for boyfriends.

If you want an IDEA of how I look...well, I have blond hair, green eyes, and a fair complexion. That's all I'm going to say.

 

[rgeere]

Originally posted by Ever onward
Hey rgeere she's only here to use us for our minds. I'm sure she's a hottie. Anyways her personality sure is attractive....

I don't know whether she is hot or not. I havn't decided.

She hasn't proven anything to me and she seems caucious. And that is fine by me if she plays these sort of games, but I want a woman not a little girl.

 

[Elfynne]

Originally posted by rgeere
I don't know whether she is hot or not. I havn't decided.

She hasn't proven anything to me and she seems caucious. And that is fine by me if she plays these sort of games, but I want a woman not a little girl.

Arrggghhh, for Pete's sake, I'm not playing any games! Why can't we just talk, like two civilized human beings?

 

[Ever onward]

Elfynne:

Whoa, whoa, whoa! Who am I rejecting?! I get the feeling you're upset. Why should you be? You've never even met me, and I've never even met you. I didn't insult or "reject" you, so don't take it that way. Gosh.

Besides, I've seen how the people here are. They rate women on their looks...HB7, HB9, 10...and it's obvious that they pick apart every little detail of a woman's appearance. They are hyper-critical. I'm not going to post my picture just so they can rate me and pick me apart as if I was some statue on exhibit. I think it would be much wiser, for the sake of my own dignity, NOT to post my picture. And I made it clear that I didn't come here to look for boyfriends.

If you want an IDEA of how I look...well, I have blond hair, green eyes, and a fair complexion. That's all I'm going to say.

rgeere:

I don't know whether she is hot or not. I havn't decided.

She hasn't proven anything to me and she seems caucious. And that is fine by me if she plays these sort of games, but I want a woman not a little girl.

Ever onward:

This is like an episode of "Moonlighting", things are getting spicy, I'm gonna stay out of this.

 

[rgeere]

Whoa, whoa, whoa! Who am I rejecting?! I get the feeling you're upset. Why should you be? You've never even met me, and I've never even met you. I didn't insult or "reject" you, so don't take it that way. Gosh.

You used a classic line *you're nice/great, but blah blah*

That one is very common, and as I have said it has been documented previously.

No, I'm not upset at all. I have a whole dorm full of girls down the street and I go to class with them and work with them. There is no shortage for me when it come to the satisfaction of knowing that women enjoy my company and I enjoy theirs.


And I made it clear that I didn't come here to look for boyfriends.

There are 20 billion men in the world. If you found 10% of them attractive that would be 2 billion. Surely a few of the two billion men are posting at this forum.


Besides, I've seen how the people here are. They rate women on their looks...HB7, HB9, 10...and it's obvious that they pick apart every little detail of a woman's appearance. They are hyper-critical. I'm not going to post my picture just so they can rate me and pick me apart as if I was some statue on exhibit. I think it would be much wiser, for the sake of my own dignity, NOT to post my picture. If you want an IDEA of how I look...well, I have blond hair, green eyes, and a fair complexion. That's all I'm going to say.

You're self-conscious and afraid of rejection. I make no promises if you post your picture, but I would still like to see it...

 

[rgeere]

This is too logical. If you're an AFC don't follow what I'm doing.