"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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How often do YOU get approached?

Borknagar

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How often do the tables get turned on you guys and the women comes to you? Just curious, cause even though I've had my ****ty luck, usually at least once they come up to me, last night right when I showed up a chick, came up to be cause she remembered me on my birthday I guess I went up to her, drunk off my ass and started kissing her? hahaha didn't get any grief from her but I could tell she was entertained by it. she was pretty hot(8-9), but was quite occupied by her friends.


Thursday night, I was out to a dead ass bar with hardly any chicks and i literally had a chick come up to me and say "I like you, you're coming home with me", she was clearing drinking more than I was(only had a beer.. driving and all) plus right away her friend was like NOOOO hahaha
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Mr Wright

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I say ive only ever been approached once and that was a pretty unique situation because i was at an event full of girls and i was like one of 20 guys out of 200 girls. But other than that, pretty much never. Even the most receptive ones dont approach.
 

bigneil

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The girls almost always initiate when you are having a good night. They make it easy for you when they like you. They'll say something like "I like that shirt" or "you are tall".
 

Rogue

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I was approached last night, and made good on the opportunity.

Chicks can be very subtle in how they approach and cloak themselves in plausible deniability. If any chick walks up to you and says anything to you, like asking you for the time, it's good to assume it's just an excuse to hit on you. But, here's the real kicker: once they approach, you must take the lead of the encounter. If you don't, they will jet.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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disgustipated

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I have a theory on this. It's that women in general are HORRIBLE at coming on to guys or "picking up" like we do, conveying interest to the point where we pick up on it. Mostly because they never have had to practice.

I try to put myself in their shoes when I fail horribly at making conversation with a chick I'm attracted to and look for the same awkward type things from them. Like stupid, awkward compliments or asking a lot of questions about the other person. These are more subtle ways of showing interest or being approached. Not everyone's going to make it so obvious or be so good at approaching the other sex. We see this in guys but also the same has to apply for women because they practice so infrequently.
 

r0cky

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I get approached once or twice a month. Even tho I go out 3x a week. Most of the time they're below my standards. But when they do meet my standards... ****ing awesome.
 

synergy1

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at least once a night for every night I go out. if I go to boston, its more frequent than that.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

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