How many of you have lived with a gf?

[skinnyguy]

Personally I haven't. The guaranteed sex must be nice, but being around her all the time and not being able to creep on other women must be tough.

 

[jnMissouri]

Yes, living together makes it tougher to bring girls back to your place if you are trying to creep. You essentially have to meet up at their place, and even then you have to make up excuses as to unexplained absences. It's less dating oriented and more **** oriented. I went over and banged quite a few chics at their places after just a few email exchanges on myspace back in the day, but with the change in messaging (no subject line) it's harder to get their attention on pof, myspace, etc.

Yes, sex whenever is great, as are random BJ's at a moments notice, but for me it isn't about the sex so much as the game/chase. I like the thrill of the chase/game. Sex is a bonus.

 

[Purefilth]

Yeah don't live with your gf. It looks good on paper and however much it makes sense financially; it's not worth the cost of freedom. You need to have your own space.

And what happens when you break up?

 

[Masculinity]

I went to visit by girlfriend (at the time) two years ago at her college apartment. It was the first time that we spent more than 6 hours together and she was super excited. I, on the other hand, get bored of women if I see them too frequently, so I was not looking forward to it. After seeing the best of a woman, living with her makes you realize that she's way father than perfect than you thought and that there are little things that she will do her way. By the same token, there are little things that you will do your way and that you will be reluctant to change.

So what happened? I clashed with her way of living and we ended up breaking up after three years of dating. Yes, it sounds intense and sudden because that's exactly what it was. It is not the same to go out with a woman on dates than to sleep next to her, go buy groceries with her, eat with her, and be around her when she comes out of the bathroom, etc.

My advice? Do not cohabitate with a woman unless you have plans to get married or have children. Once you get into that role, you will enter the role of a "safe" man, who is no longer a challenge. In addition, your social interactions with be adversely affected because you are used to being around each other all the time. In essence, she will become more like a friend. I would avoid it at all costs if I were you, OP!

 

[skinnyguy]

Wow that's scary lol... I have never bought groceries with a gf that sounds painful. I agree that the chase is fun and keeps you on your toes. I'm afraid of getting way too comfortable. Not to mention eventually she will become fat if you live together. My cousin has been with the same guy for 20 years and she looks so sloppy now.

 

[GS750]

I've been lucky to get some solid advice from older cousins who have walked the path before me. Two things they have done, and urged me not to do; Don't date women with children. And don't move in with a girl who you aren't engaged to or married to. Just don't do it. The cons greatly outweigh the pros.

 

[Meisterman]

The day after we bang I usually want nothing to do with the girl. When, and if I want to see her again I'll hit her up. I don't see the benefit in moving in with one. Seems like it would get old pretty fast.

 

[GS750]

reminds me of a Seinfeld episode where Jerry and Kramer are having this discussion...
"You go to bed, she's there. You wake up, she's there. And you can FORGET about watching tv while you eat..."

 

[Between_The_Lines]

I tried this several years ago with my girlfriend at the time, but I thankfully had my parents house to retreat to once I felt I was on the verge of losing it (I don't think I ever made it a full week without popping into my parent's at least once to sleep over). From that experience, I reached the conclusion that either I was dating the wrong girl or I was simply not cut out for cohabitation. I used to have this semi-serious joke with her that if we ever got married, we'd have our place and I'd have a studio somewhere else to concentrate on my work. In every single one of my relationships, familiarity has always bred contempt, sadly.

 

[sylvester the cat]

twice i have lived with my girlfriends. both times when the sex dried up it was like living with a sister.

 

[Zarky]

Did it once for 1.5 years. Never again. All attraction ceased.

 

[zekko]

I live with my girlfriend, 11 years now, I think it's kind of fun. But she's a very cool chick. I'm an older fellow though. Obviously, if you guys are still wanting to "creep on" other girls and bang them, it would be a bad idea to move in with one. I've sowed my wild oats and don't feel like spending all my time chasing after women.

My girl is the type I would marry, except I will never marry again, because of the legal issues involved. So I live with her as an alternative to marriage.

 

[VikingKing]

You will find her annoying within about 2 weeks. I would just avoid being around her a lot of times unless I wanted sex.

When I was at the apartment with her, I would usually drink beer, or smoke a lot of pot and play video games (in the other room). I'd basically ignore her.

Little clashes about how she does things, for example the dishes. I had to tell her how to properly do dishes so that there was not pieces of food stuck on the fork. Just stupid things.

If you choose to do it, make sure you have plenty of beer and/ or pot. Doing it sober would be difficult. Also be prepared for a break up because there is a good chance it will happen, have other plates ready.

Oh and especially don't pay for things for her. Either make her pay her share, or have her pay for your stuff. My ex basically supported my vices, and a lot of times paid rent.

 

[Ray S]

I was married. Absolute nightmare. The worst time of my life.

 

[Harry Wilmington]

This isn't really a surprise, though. For those of you who have siblings, think about how you got along with them when you were growing up with them in the house everyday vs. when you moved out, went to college, and would go to visit them. For me, my brother and I got along WAAAAAY better after I went to college 'cause (a) we didn't have to see each other everyday so we had time to miss each other, and (b) if either of us started to annoy the other, it didn't matter so much because I'd be heading back to school after a few days anyway!

This is why it's always a great idea to make sure you have your own "man space" in the house where she can't go. My parents were happily married, with one of the reasons being that any place they moved, my Dad (R.I.P.) had either a garage or an extra room in the house he could make into his own "man space" to retreat to whenever he needed alone time - and my Mom was smart enough to know he needed this and obliged with no argument! As for me, I was always of the thought that it would be better for two people to get married but still have their own places so they could continue "dating" while married.

Something like living in the same apartment building but different apartments (preferably on different floors) could make a HUGE difference in the number of couples that stay together long-term. For one, it allows for intimacy without constant attention - you live close, but you're not always up under each other, so you get time to yourself AND time to miss the other person (and when you want to see them, they're right upstairs). Two, it keeps some of the mystery in the relationship that's HELPFUL to staying attracted to each other. For example: a lot of women who live with their men leave the door open when going to the bathroom, or wake up looking like crap next to their man. This couldn't happen if she had her own place and could get made up BEFORE coming down to my apartment in the morning. And three, if both people had different ideals about how to keep their place, it wouldn't interfere much with the relationship. I once dated a girl who was GREAT in bed (one of the best I've ever had), but her place was ALWAYS messy. Which made me ponder: would I be willing to have amazing sex for the rest of my life, knowing that it would always be in a place full of clutter? Of course, this wouldn't even be a question if we had our own places - I could go see my wife in her messy place, bang the mess out of her, and then go back to my clean apartment - and therefore wouldn't be a source of stress in our relationship.

But, of course, the number of women who would agree to this arrangement are probably few and far between, lol...

 

[pyros]

I've just lived with one gf. We lived together for three months, it was great. Then we had a pause, and then we lived together again for 13 months. Besides some little annoying complains of hers it was pretty good.
We had sex three or four times a week. We watched tv, slept together, cooked together etc.

ANyway, I made sure I had my own space to go out with friends, visit my family, go to the gym, work etc. She did the same but spent a lot of time with her family instead of with her friends.

Playing this 'married' game was nice.

I broke up with her for other reasons.

 

[Masculinity]

If you choose to do it, make sure you have plenty of beer and/ or pot. Doing it sober would be difficult.

:crackup:

 

[skinnyguy]

Guaranteed sex got old quick.

Living with a woman never stopped me from being with other women.

Word. Unless the girl is letting me do ass to mouth, I'd get bored of it after 2 weeks.

 

[Bible_Belt]

I was married seven years. She needed a green card, plus we both got enough student aid from it to finish our degrees. Her rich parents paid a lot of our bills.

My current gf and I have been together seven years, lived together for five of them. She moved out a year and a half ago, and we get along ten times better now.

 

[VikingKing]

Word. Unless the girl is letting me do ass to mouth, I'd get bored of it after 2 weeks.

Good luck with that. But honestly, a woman who will do a$$ to mouth probably has some psychological issues and it would be a bad idea to live with her, or let her know where you live for that matter.