"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

How long till it's beating around the bush or you just become friends?

chancer

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 25, 2001
Messages
456
Reaction score
0
Age
45
Location
California, USA
How long till it's beating around the bush or you just become friends?

What up, I met this fine girl a month ago when school first started. She's fly, seems pretty cool, and I haven't praticed much more than kino. I told her to come to my frat party. For valentines i texted message her to come kick it with me for a bit on campus cause we were passing out roses. She told me she wasn't gonna be on campus till later, so i never got her a flower. Anyway, she's f*cking sexy and I feel like i'm moving too slow. She's called me twice already about school or about borrowing something for school. I guess i'm gonna call her up soon and find out if she's going to the party or not.

I think she's interested. We always kick it during breaks. We're always locking eye contact in class. I don't want to beat around the bush, but wtf am i doing? If she cant make it out to the party, should i ask her to come over this weekend?

How long till it's beating around the bush or you just become friends?
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

Read more...

Francisco d'Anconia

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 10, 2003
Messages
15,481
Reaction score
65
Location
Galt's Gulch
chancer said:
..How long till it's beating around the bush or you just become friends?
Guys who beat around the bush usually end up beating their meat. Think about it, why don't you think you guys hooked up on Valentines Day? Why haven't you guys done anything substantial (something more than hang out as friends)? Welcome to the friend zone, pull of a chair and wait for her to call you when she has doesn't have better plans.
 

banGbro

Banned
Joined
Dec 2, 2006
Messages
249
Reaction score
0
Looks like a duck, quaks like a duck, must be a duck. You know that? You guys are having a blasting friendship time on breaks, she borrows sh1t from her friend, must be your friend.


Ahh, hits balls doesnt it?



You can raise her IL and raise from the friend zone, which some my disagree with, but I say you can because she hasnt told you lets be friends.


Date other people. Distance yourself from her. Wait for her to hit on you. On the sight on a subtle hit, hit back, then escalate.

In turn, you are showing her that you are not some frustrated boy. She has affection for you, you want attraction. If she felt attraction for you when you two first met, then she could be attracted to you again. The above is the recipe. My advice is stop thinking about getting with her, start thinking about getting with other women. She will come with you later naturally.
 

chancer

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 25, 2001
Messages
456
Reaction score
0
Age
45
Location
California, USA
I wasn't expecting anything out of Valentines day, I was just creating rapport because the flowers were free, and I have NEVER celebrated this day.

How do I hang out with these girls and do/get more? I don't have the money to spend on dates, so I try and get these girls to come over. Although I go jogging with one, we're just friends. I usually tell them to come over to watch a movie, show them something i've been working on, do homework, or hang out and drink.

It's easy for me to say that I've been really busy lately as I'm about to graduate college and find a way to make some cheese in the real world. I obviously need to find and make time. I've been working out and feel pretty confident. i'm not afraid to talk to girls.

Beating around the bush comes to mind because, I'M NOT GETTING ANYWHERE... I'm talking to like 5 girls, and all seem distant. It's easy for me to think about other women. I was talking to one girl who blew me off, and I got a new number the same day.

It feels like I'm almost there and I can get a lot of girls, but I somewhere drop the ball. Comments?
 

vorbis

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 18, 2005
Messages
432
Reaction score
2
Location
Boston
dude how much money are you planning to spend on a girl? Go to a bar and have 2 rounds of drinks. Most likely she'll pay the second one. That means a total cost of maybe 15 bucks. Or do the movie thing but escalate from it. It's hard to set it up as romantic if ye're doing homework together!
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

chancer

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 25, 2001
Messages
456
Reaction score
0
Age
45
Location
California, USA
ok, I see what you guys are getting at. Thanks for the wake up. I'm ready to learn. The bottom line is that i can just be happy in the presence of a fine women. Even when i talked to other girls, I always choose the fine women over them, even though I got nothing out of it.

As busy as I am, women have been on my head almost everyday. My teacher even told me that I need to focus on the class (and not the HB). So I'm going to try not to think about these girls the whole week. And on the weekend i'm just gonna call the one who seems most interested. Good/Bad idea?
 

Microphone Fiend

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 30, 2003
Messages
2,300
Reaction score
17
Location
Where I be at
the time period varies. Some stuff I think that are correlated wit the time length are

-How hot she is/ how hot you are
-how often she goes out, gets approached
-how often you see each other
-how is your relationship between her? Is it strictly friendly or is it some kinda tension n you just havent made that final move?
 

realsmoothie

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 30, 2006
Messages
1,064
Reaction score
9
All I know is that I've procrastinated away enough girls to fill a couple of swimming pools.

When in doubt, make a move... believe me.
 

Nexus Polaris

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Feb 10, 2007
Messages
452
Reaction score
13
^ A lot of truth to that right there. I need to seriously work on my closing. I had been talking to this girl that had initiated everything, and I just never closed her. Now she's barely responsive to anything.
 

Bonhomme

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 2, 2002
Messages
3,956
Reaction score
16
Location
Land of the Ruins
Practice makes less imperfect. Have gals join you for fun activities that will provide opportunities to lose yourselves in the activity ... which in turn provide more opportunities to get more physical.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

IamtheAlphamale

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 14, 2003
Messages
569
Reaction score
102
To be completely honest it really completely depends. Once I worked with this girl and she was too young so I told her that. It was about a year before she got to the age I would tap. It really depends how YOU act and stuff like that. Like personally I have NEVER entered the friend zone where you CANT get the girl. I don't know what that is. And to be 100% honest the most effective way to hit up a 10 is to make it so they have to prove themselves to you and not to ask them out immediately. A lot of people will tell you otherwise but what I say is whats real.
 

chancer

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 25, 2001
Messages
456
Reaction score
0
Age
45
Location
California, USA
3/1 Overview
-As sexy as HB is, I didn't give her a lot of attention like previous classes, always looking over, making eye contact, asking something...
-I didn't hang out with her and her friend during break

I saw her in class today. She said hi. I said hi, and started doing my work (i'm behind). The teacher likes to bull**** and talk but I wasn't paying attention to him either. HB asked what I was doing this weekend, and I just replied working... then I asked what she was doing and she said the same, so i got back to work. She asked another question later, and then I caught her playing with her hair at the end of class. She looked frustrated I didn't turn and look and said some shlt. it was funny. I just kept doing my work. Finally I start packing up, and she was waiting already to go. I was so busy working that I didn't notice someone I haven't seen in a while so I said hi. And then HB says I'll see you later, and finally leaves. She was walking slow enough for me call her name and catch up. We talked for a little bit, but since I don't remember what about, it must have been nonsense... Anyway, She didn't go to the party I invited her to last week. And I'm tired of trying to figure out if she's interested... I already know enough about her not to want to just talk. Whatever happens happens. Should I just give her a call next week and try and setup a date? What kinds of questions should I be asking?
 
Top