Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

How long are you willing to wait...

bat soup

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 10, 2020
Messages
1,312
Reaction score
1,446
Age
41
Question for you guys. How many dates are you willing to give a girl before having sex? I know a lot of factors play into this situation of course.

I have been talking to this girl for about 3 weeks now. She is part of my social circle (my friend's coworker's step-daughter) and we have gone on 4 dates now. For our third date early last week we were at my place where I cooked us some food and she brought over some wine. She is really sweet and genuine and definitely seemed a little nervous when making out with me, especially as the sexual tension started to rise. She said "I don't do that stuff until at least the third date. She joked about how technically our first date was not a true date since it was with my friend and her sister. Tonight, I had her to my place again (technically our 4th date) and we cooked together; she also brought over tequila per my request. When things started to heat up again she said "this is probably a bad time to tell you.. but I'm on my period." She also mentioned later on that even if she wasn't on her period she still is not sure what would have happened because she is just still a little shy about things.

This girl really is sweet, and I am VERY much into her. Cute, great body, not selfish, funny, easy to talk to, etc., but my question is how many more dates/chances would you give a girl in your social circle? I definitely enjoy hanging out with her, but I want more than just making out and company.
As long as things are moving forward, it's all good. The problem is when things start going in the wrong direction - at that point, you have to ditch them.
 

rjc149

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jul 17, 2019
Messages
245
Reaction score
396
Location
NJ/NYC
She's coming to you, bringing the requested liquor, and making out with you. All good signs of compliance and investment, all good indications of attraction. Women who are riding other d!cks will typically flake at this point. I think she's into you.

Since you're in her social circle, and she doesn't know you that well, and word will get around on this (she's likely getting lit the fuk up for updates by everyone she knows about this), she's going to have her slut defenses way up. I would give her the benefit of the doubt that she's shy and wants to take things slow, and just be patient.

Keep building comfort, rapport, and when things get hot and heavy, take two steps forward, then a step back, two steps forward, a step back etc. Tease and be playful about it. Do not become frustrated or butthurt.

If she still refuses to touch your d!ck on the next date, either with some convenient excuse or just "isn't ready" then you should be soft-nexting her and casting your net out again. Attraction isn't high enough, or she's just hung up about sex -- generally the juice isn't worth the squeeze at that point.

It would also help to know her age.
 

EyeBRollin

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 18, 2015
Messages
4,786
Reaction score
2,411
Age
31
She has to get inside my house by the third date. My smash ratio is very high once they’re inside. But it’s more about getting her into my kingdom.

I had one chick that it took me eight dates to smash, but dates 5-8 were all her coming directly to my house cooking for me and increased escalation each time. So it’s not one size fits all...
 

RickTheToad

Moderator
Joined
Apr 21, 2018
Messages
4,385
Reaction score
3,051
Location
Bridgeport, CT
She has to get inside my house by the third date. My smash ratio is very high once they’re inside. But it’s more about getting her into my kingdom.

I had one chick that it took me eight dates to smash, but dates 5-8 were all her coming directly to my house cooking for me and increased escalation each time. So it’s not one size fits all...
8... Geez... Losing your midas touch @EyeBRollin
 

image

"If you love women, you must read the SoSuave Guide to Women. It's fantastic!"

TheNewStyle123

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 10, 2020
Messages
108
Reaction score
57
She's coming to you, bringing the requested liquor, and making out with you. All good signs of compliance and investment, all good indications of attraction. Women who are riding other d!cks will typically flake at this point. I think she's into you.

Since you're in her social circle, and she doesn't know you that well, and word will get around on this (she's likely getting lit the fuk up for updates by everyone she knows about this), she's going to have her slut defenses way up. I would give her the benefit of the doubt that she's shy and wants to take things slow, and just be patient.

Keep building comfort, rapport, and when things get hot and heavy, take two steps forward, then a step back, two steps forward, a step back etc. Tease and be playful about it. Do not become frustrated or butthurt.

If she still refuses to touch your d!ck on the next date, either with some convenient excuse or just "isn't ready" then you should be soft-nexting her and casting your net out again. Attraction isn't high enough, or she's just hung up about sex -- generally the juice isn't worth the squeeze at that point.

It would also help to know her age.
Great advice man! And she's 25
 

dark god

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 13, 2009
Messages
178
Reaction score
41
Location
Jersey
He blew it. NEXT. Two times not even naked or some head. Prob. gives off the friend vibe. Hard to come back from that. Perhaps waking a way may do something, but at this point, it's dead. Unfortunately, she's dryer than the Sahara desert in her oasis for him. If he continues on, I suspect a LJBF's offer very soon; or casper.

To all others, use this as a lesson. 1st and second dates (technically, 1st is a meet, not a date) you go for drinks only. If you are hungry, share a some appetizers. After that, 3rd date, YOUR place (home filed advantage). If she agrees, then a dude has a pretty good shot of getting something; at least her being naked and some sort of intimacy. Trust when I say, they know the game. She's no coming over to cook and play patty cake. Her interest is high enough to have sex with the dude. Be very easy going and don't say or do something weak or stupid.
Yea I agree. I stopped taking women out on "traditional" dates like 20 years ago. Usually people dont want to have sex after a good filling meal. Right to the bar is where u should be going. Alcohol lowers inhibition. Why spend a small forutune on "dinner and a movie" when u might just get a peck on the lips at the end of the nite? If she insists on doing something do cheap or free activities.
Just my 2 cents
 

Linear

Banned
Joined
Jan 6, 2021
Messages
5
Reaction score
3
Age
33
Location
Chicago
Yea I agree. I stopped taking women out on "traditional" dates like 20 years ago. Usually people dont want to have sex after a good filling meal. Right to the bar is where u should be going. Alcohol lowers inhibition. Why spend a small forutune on "dinner and a movie" when u might just get a peck on the lips at the end of the nite? If she insists on doing something do cheap or free activities.
Just my 2 cents
same thing for me mate
 

TheNewStyle123

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 10, 2020
Messages
108
Reaction score
57
Yea I agree. I stopped taking women out on "traditional" dates like 20 years ago. Usually people dont want to have sex after a good filling meal. Right to the bar is where u should be going. Alcohol lowers inhibition. Why spend a small forutune on "dinner and a movie" when u might just get a peck on the lips at the end of the nite? If she insists on doing something do cheap or free activities.
Just my 2 cents
Amen brother.
 

2Rocky

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 13, 2016
Messages
548
Reaction score
467
Age
46
Her mentioning her period on the last date is pretty much giving you the green light for the next time together. The emotional investment she has in the relationship so far is getting pretty high. Give her 5 days or so to sort it out and invite her over with rock solid logistics. An overnight weekend might not be a bad investment if you have a place to getaway.

Given the age of 25, social circle, prior date progression, She is very much interviewing for long term. All her friends are getting married and having babies. The pressure is high for her, right now, to cuff a guy.
 
Top