"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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How have I gone wrong

toasttopper1879

Don Juan
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The girl I've got to know recently has really left me pissing against the wind.I've really no idea what went wrong,if in fact it has gone wrong.I've already posted this week but now I'm well baffled and a bit curious as well.
I get to know the girl,shes friendly toward me so I up the ante and start the ****y funny and get a good bit rapport started.Again she responds and the kino starts.
All the time I remain unfazed and allow the connection to build up.She starts to ask questions about me,my past n my ideas for the future and she wants to share hers.The flirting becomes in my opinion quite strong.Lots of fun fights,tickling,touching in places yer dont touch your mates and conversations about sex occur quite often.Her body language is wide open and too a tee she shows just about every sign of attraction there is.Even other people have noticed our actions and pointed out things maybe going on.
But and its a big BUT.She has a boyfriend.Quite a recent one and I did know this.She claims to really like this boyfriend,she doodles his name etc and likes to occasionally tell me how wonderful she thinks he is.I dont bite and i refuse to become her tampax so I can quite easy change or avoid the subject when its brought up.
My question is.I really cant understand where I've gone wrong here.Everything sat up nicely for a result but the boyfriend thing creeps in.What sort of surrogate have I allowed myself to become cos theres no way I've allowed myself into a friend zone.I cant understand how a girl can be so interested on 1 hand and not on another.I know i should nt listen to her words and I should just stick to her actions but on this occasion I cant,even if my gut says everything will be ok.Maybe i've become too aloof and left her wondering too much about me.I really dont know.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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stalluproar

Senior Don Juan
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Since you will not be allowed into that friends zone, now is the time to be blunt with her. The next time she brings up the subject about her BF and how wonderful he is, challenge her on it. Accuse her of picking you up and you doubt she actually likes him. Then lean back and withdraw a little and see how she responds. This is a good test to throw at her to see if she is bluffing or is serious about him.
 

abcd_z

Senior Don Juan
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Oslo, Norway
Dude, you worry too much. Just chill and let the chips fall where they may. From the sounds of it, she picked another guy for a boyfriend that wasn't you. Tough situation. I've been there, I know what it's like. But as it is, you're gonna give yourself a bad case of oneitis for her, if you haven't already. Chill out, distance yourself from the situation. Oh, and GFTOW and let us know if she still seems important.
 

becker

Master Don Juan
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You're not doing anything wrong, the girl is obviously an AW, and just likes the attention she gets from males. It's like a drug for her. She knows she's in a fine position because she can flirt with you all she wants, and knows she has you, yet can pull out the BF card whenever she wants to get out of things with you.

Simple case of greed. Some women ARE that evil, and don't think for a second that just because she's being nice to you, she's not like that. My last girlfriend was like an absolute epitome of innocence, but even she had this in her. It's an inherent characteristic of all women. That's why you always wait until she makes the move to insist on being exclusive before you do.
 

toasttopper1879

Don Juan
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Having read the legendary Pooks insights on this,he claims there are two different ways why a girl mentions a boyfriend.If she says how she feels about him then shes a non runner but if she mentions what she just does with him then shes possibly just doing it for social proofing.Am I correct in assuming this.
This girl says she normally gets fed up with a boyfriend after 3 months and wants space but this time shes not fed up and enjoys cuddling up .I pointed out that maybe she's found the One and she said she hoped so.I told her maybe they should move in together but she said no,she still liked her space.
Not sure what catagory this fits into in pooks law but it bloody baffles me.
Someone pass me the oneitis buster pills please.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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