"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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how fast are your hands?

metoo

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can you drop a foot-square white pine board and break it ("with the grain") with a punch? Can you drop a coin, draw a pistol from concealment and fire before the coin hits the ground? A lot of women like having a "man's man", and men dig this sort of stuff, a lot. Yet it's pretty simple to build this sort of speed, actually. It just takes determination and a few months of spare time, a few minutes per day.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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backbreaker

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i feel like my piano playing/practice I probably do have faster hands than the avg person does. once you start getting into advanced licks /chord progeessions, espeically wtih jazz.

also feel I am more creative than the avg person, something I think that this has alot to do with as well. i have been playing the piano for 2 deacdes and to this day can't read sheet music. i play the violin and can read trebble clef for the violin like i am reading this post, but never bothered to learn for the piano. but if i don't have perfect pitch it's pretty damn close, if i hear something a few times i can generally play what i hear to the key, but what i usually do is is just to use a song as a baseline to **** around with various chords. very erroll garner eque, i rarely play the same thing if ever twice.

lol one of my wife's biggest pet peeves of mine is whenever i hear a song i have never heard before, or hell just a song in gneeral i break out my imaginary piano and start playing it without even thinking about it, it's out of habit now. she thought i was full of ****, about 6 months after i met her she bet me basically a really good home cooked meal of whatever i wanted i coudldn't play the next song that came on the radio, and it was a jazzed up version of John Brown's Body which I nailed in about 10 mintues after hearing it a few times. I mean, not to the extent that oscar peterson nailed it make no mistake, you will never mistake me for oscar peterson, there are things he can do on the piano i just physically can't do yet ("with his hands) is i but i nailed it nevertheless. talk about floored lol.

one of my goals one day is to put out a CD of me playing christmas jazz music. i don't give a **** if i sale one copy lol. i have talent, just so i can say i did it.
 

HoneyHitter

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backbreaker said:
one of my goals one day is to put out a CD of me playing christmas jazz music. i don't give a **** if i sale one copy lol. i have talent, just so i can say i did it.
Lovin your attitude, I feel like the essence of a man can be found in his legacy. Whether it's physical (a book, CD, some kinda product) or something of intellectual value like a unique philosophy, discovery or skill that he can pass on to others in and beyond his life's boundaries.

Btw, stop comparing yourself with Oscar Peterson. :crackup:
There's a couple of people with maybe 10 percent of his talent making a decent living off of their talent. There's ALWAYS room for original, hard-working people.
 
R

Rubato

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backbreaker said:
one of my goals one day is to put out a CD of me playing christmas jazz music. i don't give a **** if i sale one copy lol. i have talent, just so i can say i did it.
Seriously do that backbreaker. I had been meaning to put together a CD since 7th grade or so and I kept putting it off. When I finally actually finished it in 2008 (like almost 10 years later), it was totally worth it. By then I had a band I we sold 50 copies (woohoo).

But it wasn't those 50 copies that made it great... it was the fact that I had a CD that I was 100% responsible for. It was a tangible expression of my work.

Seriously, do it.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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backbreaker

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HoneyHitter said:
Lovin your attitude, I feel like the essence of a man can be found in his legacy. Whether it's physical (a book, CD, some kinda product) or something of intellectual value like a unique philosophy, discovery or skill that he can pass on to others in and beyond his life's boundaries.

Btw, stop comparing yourself with Oscar Peterson. :crackup:
There's a couple of people with maybe 10 percent of his talent making a decent living off of their talent. There's ALWAYS room for original, hard-working people.
lol i wasn't trying to, just that the particular song was played by Oscar Peterson, and when I said i nailed dit i didn't want to make it sound like i nailed the song in the sense that he nailed it, and could lay the song verbatim as he could, because i can't.
 

metoo

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I wrote Paladin Press's best selling book, a little how-to pamphlet entitled. HOW TO MAKE A SILENCER FOR A .22. It has made them millons of $, sold over 1/2 million copies since 1994, but unfortunately, I took an immediate, small "lump sum" because I was desperately in need of cash. I'd now be making 20k a year off of that book, had I kept the rights to it. Sheesh, makes me puke to think of it.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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