Do you have any suggestions on style? I really suck as fashion. I've reached out to female friends and they like it when I wear conservative stuff but it's like asking women for dating advice, they'll tell me exactly what they want not necessarily what other women want.
Ah yes, this is a bit ambiguous
What hobbies should I explore?
It’s late at night, I just got back from a party, and I have to work tomorrow—so I’m letting AI fix my grammar:
You can shop at Old Navy, Gap, or Banana Republic. These stores have clothes without big logos, so you don’t look like a walking billboard. Most of their pieces are wardrobe essentials, but they come in a variety of colors.
To start, I’d suggest picking up jeans, sweatpants, shorts, T-shirts, polos, and long-sleeve versions of those shirts. After that, you can add layers like an oversized jacket, a button-up, or a cardigan.
As for shoes, start with a pair of boots, sneakers, and dress shoes. Begin with the basics, and once you’ve got those down, you can take more risks.
But here’s something important: dress your age. Don’t be in your 30s, a grown adult, and dressing like a teenager—wearing Crocs, a fanny pack, sunglasses indoors, and shirts covered in logos.
However—and this is a big however—what really matters is how well your clothes fit. The only way to make clothes look truly good is to have a body that fits them well. That means going to the gym and lifting weights.
So what are your stats? How much can you bench press, deadlift, and squat?
Honestly, if women are saying you give off “dad vibes,” it might be because you’re missing sex appeal. And sex appeal often comes from having a well-built body: a defined upper chest and broad shoulders. Keep in mind, when people say “dad bod,” they usually mean someone chubby with a bit of a beer belly.
Lastly, get a haircut. You can take inspiration from contestants on dating reality TV shows—they’re usually well-groomed and styled to look attractive on
camera.
As for personality, read Chapter 11 of Psycho-Cybernetics. The idea is to say what’s on your mind. It ties into the metaphor of unbuttoning your shirt—being emotionally open. Seduction involves openness, even if it’s partly a performance. If you can’t open up, you probably struggle to give in other ways too.
In terms of hobbies, there are tons you can explore: cooking, woodworking, gardening, team sports, swimming, programming, beekeeping, motocross, hunting, beer/wine making - you name it. The key is to find what you enjoy. Don’t copy me. Follow your own values and integrity.
Sounds like you’ve got some reading—and maybe some working out—to do.
