How do you know your seen as Alpha of a group?

[kraytkiller]

So over the past few months, I've been trying to establish myself as more of an alpha, leader of the pack, ect type person. The situation is now, I usually lead where people I'm with at the time go, they ask me for information, like where to find stuff, buy things, ect. Also a couple guys validate themselves to me.

So have I become an Alpha figure of the group? Or What? What are signs that people look up to you in that sort of way?

 

[Ziniath]

I'll be honest brother, if you're constantly having to check in to see whether or not you are alpha, you are not alpha: it's a cruel irony.

This all depends on your definition of what an alpha male is though. I believe everybody is an alpha male in moments when they are doing what they want, not checking in to see if they're accepted/rejected, and walking the path they want to walk.

I'm sure there have been moments when you've been in the zone, doing what you want without even considering the thoughts and opinions of those around you. You're walking your path, and that's that.

The question is: do you know what your path is in any given moment?

Check in with yourself to see why you are acting the way in which you are.

Are you doing it to impress somebody?
Or are you acting the way you act because you wouldn't live your life any other way?

One of those motives is the motive of the alpha, the other is the motive of the man who's TRYING to be the alpha, rather than just BEING the alpha.

edit: something else I've noticed is the label of alpha means nothing to the man we label alpha - he doesn't do things to be recognised, he does them because he is passionately moved to do so.

 

[Ice882]

When your the alpha, everyone says hey, and no one ignores you.

I know because I'm the alpha at my school now.

 

[Bonafide]

^lmao...

 

[Rhoto]

The question is: do you know what your path is in any given moment?

This is probably the most effective piece of advice I've read on the forum recently.

It is a subtle, yet incredibly powerful question, you should ask yourself, often.

 

[NSUballer]

I havent always been the alpha dog. When I first got to college I surely wasnt. I was shy, not confident, had false assumptions and perceptions of reality when it came to the same and more importantly the opposite sex.

It took me about 2 years to emerge into my birthright as an alpha. Thats what it is. You have to be born with a certain personality and swagger. The way you carry yourself more precisely.

Im now a senior, and I feel like I run this place. Doesnt matter where I go. School, cafeteria, walkin down the hallway, through the parkin lot, grocery store, doesnt matter. For some reason people seem to be drawn to me. Always tryin to get a peek at me and what Im doin. I dont really know or understand why this happens. It just does. So I act accordingly.

No guys ever challenge me, get in my face, etc. Im not an Ahole at all, unless I need to be. Im assertive, confident, ambitious. The only thing is im not as physically dominant as i was when i played football and worked out 5 days a week. that will change very soon though.

For instance, last thursday i meet this girl through her younger sister. We go out have a good time and I end up laying next to her in the morning, naked. Ive only done this a few times in my life because thats never what I was about. But I couldnt help it with this girl, she was that sexy. And shes got a brand new lexus and shes a nurse. I have no job, no car, and I live in a trailer. Which will also change pretty soon.

 

[Alle_Gory]

So over the past few months, I've been trying to establish myself as more of an alpha, leader of the pack, ect type person. The situation is now, I usually lead where people I'm with at the time go, they ask me for information, like where to find stuff, buy things, ect. Also a couple guys validate themselves to me.

So have I become an Alpha figure of the group? Or What? What are signs that people look up to you in that sort of way?

How important is your opinion to the group? And your decisions about where to go, what to do... etc.

 

[synergy1]

So over the past few months, I've been trying to establish myself as more of an alpha, leader of the pack, ect type person. The situation is now, I usually lead where people I'm with at the time go, they ask me for information, like where to find stuff, buy things, ect. Also a couple guys validate themselves to me.

So have I become an Alpha figure of the group? Or What? What are signs that people look up to you in that sort of way?

Never understood the obsession with being alpha. You are what you are. Some guys percolate to the top, others do not. Odds are, if you are posting on a forum to get girls, you are not "that guy".

Todays society is too focused on "leaders". Corporate America ( with which I have plenty experience) is a case of too many chiefs and not enough Indians. Everyone tries to be in charge, nothing actually gets done. To use the sports metaphor, you have a captain and some assistant captains but you win or lose as a team.

 

[radiodude]

Ziniath nailed it. Very well done!

I would only add this:

In so far as people asking for your opinion, checking with you to see what you think and so on, this is often the result of them seeing you as having more expereince or knowledge on a given subject. Could be because of their perception of your education on the subject, your work expereince, life expereince, etc. People ask you questions to get asnwers when they trust and rely on you as a good information source.

 

[cola]

If you actually sit around trying to be "alpha".. Your not alpha.. Your not even beta or omega.. Just strange.

 

[zekko]

Never understood the obsession with being alpha.

I can understand it. Theoretically the alpha male, the top guy in the food chain, supposedly has his pick of all the women in his tribe. That's the position most of the guys who come here would like to be here. Either to get more women, or to get that one woman they have oneitis for.

BUT I think "alpha male" is another term that the seduction community has taken and changed its definition. To many people here, all alpha male means is a guy who has good inner game. Inner game is a good thing to have, but I'm not convinced that makes you an alpha male.

 

[romangod]

When your the alpha, everyone says hey, and no one ignores you.

I know because I'm the alpha at my school now.

I totally agree with this alpha statement. When you say "hey" and people respond back with a "hey" you're definitely an alpha.


Cheers!

 

[synergy1]

I can understand it. Theoretically the alpha male, the top guy in the food chain, supposedly has his pick of all the women in his tribe. That's the position most of the guys who come here would like to be here. Either to get more women, or to get that one woman they have oneitis for.

BUT I think "alpha male" is another term that the seduction community has taken and changed its definition. To many people here, all alpha male means is a guy who has good inner game. Inner game is a good thing to have, but I'm not convinced that makes you an alpha male.

I can understand being #1, but not understand everything trying to be #1. You could just as easily hang out with a bunch of nerds and call yourself, alpha but you aren't fooling anyone. Make good friends, learn to be social and this "alpha" thing will be irrelevant. There are more than enough hot girls that no one is talking to regardless of their perceived "status"

 

[Alle_Gory]

Inner game is a good thing to have, but I'm not convinced that makes you an alpha male.

Obviously there's more to it. But you can't be the top dog unless you got your inner game tight. You'll fall apart like a cheap house made of Chinese drywall when **** happens.

 

[zekko]

you can't be the top dog unless you got your inner game tight.

Oh, I agree. To be alpha you have to have good inner game. But having good inner game alone will not make you the top of the food chain.

I can understand being #1, but not understand everything trying to be #1. You could just as easily hang out with a bunch of nerds and call yourself, alpha but you aren't fooling anyone. Make good friends, learn to be social and this "alpha" thing will be irrelevant. There are more than enough hot girls that no one is talking to regardless of their perceived "status"

Clearly everybody can't be number one. But the real definition of an alpha male is that he is number one. But in the seduction community, this definition seems to have been watered down to just mean someone who is confident in themselves. It's good to be confident in yourself, but that doesn't make you the alpha male.

Fortunately, as you say, in modern life the lines are more blurred, and a lot of the time there is no clear alpha male, or the role is shared by a number of men, or it goes back and forth. I'm not so convinced there are that many hot girls that "no one is talking to" though.

 

[xdreamz]

Kobe Bryant is alpha. why? because he leads the team and brings them to a higher level. he goes above and beyond his given role on the team.

we are not animals. we do not live in tribes. we can't just pick any woman and have them no matter what, everything takes effort.....

 

[synergy1]

Fortunately, as you say, in modern life the lines are more blurred, and a lot of the time there is no clear alpha male, or the role is shared by a number of men, or it goes back and forth. I'm not so convinced there are that many hot girls that "no one is talking to" though.

Thanks for the clear up. Another posted alluded to the same thing, so I guess I'll take the definition of 'alpha' as stated on these forums.

The last point is somewhat subjective with regards to ones location. Are there a lot of hot girls getting no attention in a town of 500? Fvck no, they are probably married or knocked up. Ask someone in a city, especially Boston or NYC and you'll get a different affirmative answer. Better yet, ask an American who has been to some Eastern European countries; suffice to say going out there changed my view concerning hot women pretty significantly!

 

[zekko]

The last point is somewhat subjective with regards to ones location. Are there a lot of hot girls getting no attention in a town of 500? Fvck no, they are probably married or knocked up. Ask someone in a city, especially Boston or NYC and you'll get a different affirmative answer. Better yet, ask an American who has been to some Eastern European countries; suffice to say going out there changed my view concerning hot women pretty significantly!

I live in a smaller town, not as small as 500, but it's certainly no Boston or NYC. So maybe that does affect the ratio of hot women. Not sure why exactly - unless it's that all the hot women take off for the big city for a more exciting lifestyle. The other thing I might observe is it seems like women in smaller towns are more likely to let themselves go weight-wise. Guys too, for that matter. Again, not sure why.

What is it about Eastern Europe that changes your view on hot women? Is it mainly because there are less obese people there? Or are you talking about attitudes?

 

[xdreamz]

dude ur not going to find any girls in beantown.... its all about LA, that's where you go for the girls IN THE US.

 

[jophil28]

So over the past few months, I've been trying to establish myself as more of an alpha, leader of the pack, ect type person. The situation is now, I usually lead where people I'm with at the time go, they ask me for information, like where to find stuff, buy things, ect. Also a couple guys validate themselves to me.

So have I become an Alpha figure of the group? Or What? What are signs that people look up to you in that sort of way?

You will be closer to being an Alpha when you cringe at the thought of asking a bunch on guys on this forum what makes you an Alpha.