"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
How do you forget about a girl?
- Thread starter Brighty
- Start date
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
Igetit!
Moderator
The most common answer is just to date other girls,but really,the one thing that ALWAYS works (for me,at least) is time. The longer you are out of her presense,the less you'll think about her. After a while,you won't even remember what's her name. Hmmm,my spider sense is tingling. Hey,you're not talking about the same girl you made the other thread about are you? You know,the thread in which you asked if you're in the friendzone as soon as a girl talks about her boyfriend?Brighty said:
Igetit! said:
Ahh, no, not the same girl, although because I hung around that girl, I did make this one hot girl crazy jealous and now she won't leave me alone. Which is nice.
What I'm talking about is the same girl from http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=155907 , just minus the lifestory. The huge problem is that I see her in the hallway everyday and I have a class with her, despite her sitting on the other side of the room. I'm trying everything to get over her, but whenever I see her I get that fluttery feeling in my stomach and I can't seem to help it.
TheDoctor
Don Juan
These things will distract you and get you through the time at hand. Only time will heal. If and when the thoughts creep into your head, entertain them for a few seconds, then focus your thoughts on something else. Don't dwell on the thoughts, it will eat you from the inside.
Good Luck
Igetit!
Moderator
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Ollie
Don Juan
Go Fvck Ten Other Chicks
Works every time or your money back
So what happens when he obsesses about something else?Ollie said:
Its an obsession and an unhealthy thought cycle. Control yourself. Think about something else, or nothing at all. Meditate to control your thoughts.
Yep. If it's just a girl shouldn't be a problem. If it's someone you love it's going to be hard, trust me.TheDoctor said:
Time tends to be the best. Break ALL contact, do anything to keep your mind off her (it won't fully work but it helps), and hang with your buddies
WC2
Master Don Juan
It's one thing to be bent out of shape about an EX, but to be totally obsessed with girl who you have not been intimate with is an unhealthy infatuation.
So now to the answer to your question..
Sadly, there are 2 ways you quickly stop being infatuated with this girl.
1. You make a move and fail.
2. You make a move and succeed.
If you don't make a move, this fantasy is just going to keep lingering around in your head till it comes to a pulp.. and you'll probably try to make a move on her anyways when it comes to that point. The downside is that you'll be so obsessed with her that your nerves are going to kick in and you'll fail miserably.
So why not just get it out of the way now?
It's easy as, "hey I was thinking.. you're a cute girl and I'm not a bad looking guy.. why don't we get together tonight?"
Yes, if she answers no then you'll be devastated.
But in the long run, it's healthier. Get this chick out of your mind for godsakes. There are too many fish in the sea.
If she says yes, then you'll find out what your infatuating about finally.
You never really know a chick till you've been intimate with her for a good amount of time. By then, I guarantee you that these false beliefs of her being some sexual goddess will have escaped from your mind; you'll take her for granted.
Either way you must do something.
If not, you'll drive yourself crazy forever.
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
WC2 said:
Thank you very much for the advice, guys, especially you WC2. I'll keep you guys posted on how it goes. Alle I've always wanted to have better control over my thoughts (would make falling asleep a lot easier) and meditation has always appealed to me. How would you go about starting off as a newb at meditation?
Crazy Asian
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Jan 29, 2007
- Messages
- 1,060
- Reaction score
- 9
- Age
- 34
understand that you WILL improve and get better girls, and not getting this girl is only a reflection of your current skills level.... and that should motivate ou even more to succeed.
meet new people.
daygameguy
Master Don Juan
Simple. Start liking another one.Brighty said:
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
What if he does this again with a new girl? How many times can he run away?xdreamz said:
He needs self control, and he needs to figure out the reason for this obsession. Its not healthy. Its addictive.
nismo-4
Moderator
- Joined
- Jan 31, 2005
- Messages
- 4,438
- Reaction score
- 1,142
2. Cut off all contact with whoever dumped you.
3. Learn some new tricks for your game.
4. If you're in music/ entertainment, focus hard on it...can u say groupies = easy sex + no effort?
5. Chill and play Mega Man 2 or Mega Man 3.