How do you feel right before first OLD meeting?

[Jifto]

Im new to OLD and coming out of a bad relationship. In the past I've always loved looking forward to dates with women or going out with the prospects of meeting women.

I'm a few hours out from meeting with a girl I met online, the second in two weeks. I'm not looking forward to it. It's a mixture of nerves and annoyance.

It feels like I'm going on a job interview for a job I'm not really that excited about.

Is this normal?

 

[Serenity]

Yes this is normal when you haven't dated in a while. It's something you'll get comfortable with after probably a few more first dates. It's mixed feelings leading to this. You kinda want it to go we'll but you kinda fear that it won't. What happens is your mind starts grinding as it's impossible to predict the outcome, this is the nervousness and annoyance you feel.

I used to feel like that, but I face so much uncertainty every day now that it doesn't bother me. I just relax and take things as they come. I find that nervousness and excitement is the same feeling, but it's perceived differently depending on whether you see the potential rewards or the potential disappointments. I'm desensitized to loss, so facing situations such as this leaves me excites about what I might gain.

It's basically fear of losing. If you can accept losing then you won't be bothered like you are now. If you really think about you can't really lose on a first date, because you didn't already have her in the first place.

 

[bigneil]

If you like her enough, there will be some jitter, but eventually you lose that and it will help. Girls sense it and while it is slightly endearing (if they really like you) it tends to make them feel superior which is not good.

And while I thought I was over this, last week I saw an 18 year old beauty at Publix and I literally felt my hand trembling as I took out some cash to pay for the groceries. I had to give her credit. It made me wonder if old age is a return to being totally beta. Once these girls are unobtainable, aren't we in the same boat we were when we were 12?

 

[RedZone]

i never feel excited to go on a date from OLD. I think because from the messaging/texts you feel like you already know this person before you even go on the date. Then when on the date theres not much to talk about because you already talked so much.

 

[Who Dares Win]

I feel relaxed if the meeting happens at walking distance from my place or in an area where a flake wouldnt make much difference.

I feel annoyed if I have to drive or do something I wouldnt do otherwise...thats probalby the reason why I dont plan dates outside the first case.

Personally I can relax with a woman only when I'm already with her and we already had sex, or at least my investment is so low that her leaving wouldnt make much of a difference.

 

[QuadDeuces]

I never have the first date at my house, you dont know who you're inviting in. I always meet on neutral territory first.
A random bar, have a few drinks, then invite the girl for a movie and another drink at my place. The rest goes automatically.
It becomes kind of a routine to be honest.

 

[cola]

Indifferent. I try to do bars/clubs so if the date didn't go well and i have to dismiss her my whole night doesn't go to sh*t.

 

[RedZone]

In my opinion texting needs to be minimal and largely un-initiated on the DJs part. This applies to me regardless of how I meet them.

Yeah, I could agree to that. Much rather meet someone not online though. Feel much better to meet someone in person. That's just me though.

 

[Red Legg]

The last three OLD slvts I met them at their house had drinks with them and fvcked them within 30 minutes...I was not nervous at all.One of them told me (single mom) that usually men she meets on OLD and invites over are too scared to meet her lol she said one guy pulled up in front of her house but then "took off" lol....cowards...he has no idea what he missed.

 

[ubercat]

If you're a bit new to the game controlling nerves is really easy. Just take them to a local spot and become a regular there. Unfortunately there's not much in my area. So daytime dates are at a local market in a university grounds that has small Lakes and plenty of places to walk. I have to drive to the next Neighborhood to get to a decent pub. Drawcard there is has sports on TV couches and pool tables. It's 15 minutes drive so I'm still willing to count it as a local.

If the girl wants to meet in town I take her to a huge wine bar that has four separate spaces so you can do the venue shift without ever leaving. And if I want to shake things up there is a fantastic gelati ice cream place close by. Since that's a bit of investment in time I always schedule 2 dates for that night. I'm Irregular at all three places.

 

[nismo-4]

I'll get a girl's number from OLD but not hold my breath about meeting. If we meet, great, if not, totally ddleted and blocked. 1 strike rule in full effect.

It's afterward that I worry about, because if she doesn't respond after a meetup or date, you have failed by not beating enough of the competition.

 

[nismo-4]

I don't know if old women are the same as real life hot chicks. There are still women in my neighborhood that I barely ever see at the local gym/bar/grocery store. Real life beautiful women are so high value and rare that there needs to be something wrong with them in order for them to seek validation online. A beautiful woman in real life can barely go to Starbucks without the world caving in on her.

I once pulled an hb8 and used her laptop as she was asleep. I checked all of her website history and saw no porn, old sites, nothing interesting. It was all research stuff (she was a psych major). I went to school for information technology so I know my way around a laptop I couldn't find anything. And it's pretty consistent with other women I have dated. They go through 100 cat calls a day. There has to be something wrong with a hot chick who has to avoid thirsty guys all day yet are everywhere on social media and old sites.

I can guarantee you she has some form of social media. She still seeks validation.

The reason why hot chicks get hit on a lot is because of this pua myth that "hot chicks don't get hit on often. Average guys are intimidated, she's waiting for someone like you to grab your balls and talk to her." Now a bunch of average joes, well guys in general, are hitting on them much more.

They think, what have I got to lose? I won't see her again until there's a blizzard in hell. I'm only gonna live once. I'm not getting any younger. Good mindset, but what do you have to offer her? That gets thrown out too because there is an element of luck and timing.

All fine and dandy, but as we all know, every woman has a guy in their life in some capacity.

It's all about getting to the top of the high score list. First place. Where do ignore tactics work? Only when interest exists. Any other time, you're just invisible.

Women love getting attention and validation. Men love sex. Ever heard of a man who enjoys being a woman's friend or orbiter? I sure haven't.

 

[Jifto]

I don't know if old women are the same as real life hot chicks. There are still women in my neighborhood that I barely ever see at the local gym/bar/grocery store. Real life beautiful women are so high value and rare that there needs to be something wrong with them in order for them to seek validation online. A beautiful woman in real life can barely go to Starbucks without the world caving in on her.

I once pulled an hb8 and used her laptop as she was asleep. I checked all of her website history and saw no porn, old sites, nothing interesting. It was all research stuff (she was a psych major). I went to school for information technology so I know my way around a laptop I couldn't find anything. And it's pretty consistent with other women I have dated. They go through 100 cat calls a day. There has to be something wrong with a hot chick who has to avoid thirsty guys all day yet are everywhere on social media and old sites.

I've met a few HB girls that have OLD profiles simply as a form of validation. They don't actively respond to messages but love the constant stream of flattery they get on a daily basis.