"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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How do you cut loose a friend without hurting him?

Swoop

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When you have a friend that starts to become toxic to you life, how do you cut him loose without hurting him?
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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reyalp

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tell him that next time you guys hang out you're going to invite your preacher friend over to share the good word with him.
 

Scrumtulescence

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If he's truly a "friend" and not just some acquaintance you hang out with, have you tried helping him first before ejecting him from your life?
 

Swoop

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Originally posted by Scrumtulescence
If he's truly a "friend" and not just some acquaintance you hang out with, have you tried helping him first before ejecting him from your life?
He is a friend. We kick it almost every night. We had fun but I have grown. I am no longer into the wild life anymore. He is still into it. I tried to make him grow with me. But you can't help someone who doesn't want to be help. He loves this type of life style. I am moving on to brighter and better things. So now, it's hard to say no to him when he calls me up to go out. I even told him I am giving it up. But he doesn't understand. He thinks I am just going thru some phase and tries to get me back in it. He doesn't understand I really have move on. He is very stubborn He won't listen until he figure things on his own. And lately, he has been making things difficult on me. I value our past but if he doesn't want to grow with me but actually holding me back, I came to the conclusion, I have to cut him loose. But I don't want to hurt him as he has been a pal to me ever since we met.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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ObieJuan

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Honestly, it doesn't really matter. I had a friend like this a while ago. This guy was a momma's boy and a loser. I tried everything to get him to attend school, get a decent job and gain some respect...none of which he ever did. He even used to want to borrow things and also smashed my window while drunk one night arguing with his g/f- turns out he felt he shouldn't have to pay in any sort of way since I had sold the car later on afterward. Later on I found out his girl was trying to get back at him by cheating on me. I even told him what's up and invited her over after he said in a number of words he didn't care. The day after he changed his mind...but I already did the damn thing. He finds out, and asks how I can do this to him, blah blah blah...then stops talking to me for a while. Now every now and again he'll try to contact me but I have no respect for him since he got back with that girl- it demonstrated exactly what I needed to prove to myself he would never be a true friend. On top of all this he lies to people, including me- his so-called "best friend".

All I'm saying is you'll have to find your own reasons. Good luck bro.
 

StrangeButTrue

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There's no way to do it without hurting him. I've cut loose my share of friends since I began to shed my AFC ways.

One way is no better than the next. Next time he does something ****ty to you, make a big deal out of it to piss him off.

Don't talk to him a lot, avoid hanging out with him. You guys will drift apart.
 

Chillisauce

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I'm a master at burning bridges, i'm not even sure there is a way to leave a friend without cutting them up.

Mayb try cutting back on the amount of time you spend with him bit by bit each week until eventually you only see him once a fortnight.
 

Kerensky

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Let him do the work for you. Your only task it to say no and make up excuses to not hang out with him. Slowly he will hate you and want to cut you off.

good luck soldier
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Swoop

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thanks for the tips. Yea I am gonna go with the drift apart method. I haven't hang out with him for almost 2 weeks now. He still calls me up but he's started to doubt I'll be available to hang out since I have been shooting him down lately. But my reasons are solid ones. We'll see how it goes..
 
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