Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

How Do You Cold Approach, When every Woman is in a Group?

Zimbabwe

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 29, 2021
Messages
2,099
Reaction score
2,645
Age
26
Cold approaching random women alone is already tough enough, but a while group is extremely hard to pull off. You have to entertain the entire group and somehow slowly isolate her away from the rest of the group. This is not an easy task by any means.

It is extremely rare during the day to ever see a woman out alone, they are almost always in groups or pairs. It doesn't matter if it's the shops,supermarket or just the streets, they always travel in groups.

How do you Cold approach when every woman is in a group.
 

DarwinTaurus

Don Juan
Joined
May 18, 2022
Messages
173
Reaction score
138
Age
45
Location
Darwin, Australia
I'm a Solo Wolf when it comes to Pubs, not that I don't have friends, I just usually go to my local bar after work to relax and have a few knock-off drinks. One thing I can confirm from your comments, and from other people in numerous threads here, is that this isn't a phenomenon with Women, ie: they aren't "Solo She-Wolves". So if like me, and you are flying solo, it is hard to cold approach women in bars, when they are in groups. Perhaps an IDGAF attitude is they key?
 

EyeOnThePrize

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 9, 2019
Messages
1,022
Reaction score
1,646
Age
31
Cold approaching random women alone is already tough enough, but a while group is extremely hard to pull off. You have to entertain the entire group and somehow slowly isolate her away from the rest of the group. This is not an easy task by any means.

It is extremely rare during the day to ever see a woman out alone, they are almost always in groups or pairs. It doesn't matter if it's the shops,supermarket or just the streets, they always travel in groups.

How do you Cold approach when every woman is in a group.
This is just one approach style of many;
Never approach the hottest girl (the one you're really after) directly or immediately. Start chatting with one of the 5s or 7s, and don't make it cheesy, pretend like she's a millionaire's daughter and you're just networking.

Talk about something in the present moment as an ice breaker "man this DJ is playing his guts out, why is he so sweaty though?", keep the banter light. Ignore the hot one and pretend like the conversation you're having with the 7 is getting super fun (sometimes it really is, they have richer personalities than the dimes 95% of the time). Laugh loudly when she cracks a joke, break the touch barrier, make it a way more fun conversation than what the other girls are talking about.

The 7 might introduce you to the group, but it's not necessary. You want them to slowly all glob onto you two because they're seeking a good time and you two seem to be having it. Most of the time if the hot one is interested in you she'll come over by you two and try to inject herself into the situation, because dimes can't stand when their sub-par friends are getting more attention than them, they've grown in an environment where they're always the center of attention so they project that. It also disarms the group to see one of their friendlier, nicer girls getting some love.

And that's usually it, you're in with the group. You can slowly draw the 8s, 9s, and 10s into the conversation for some social validation, or just tease them.

Most of the time it really drives the hot ones nuts if you continue focusing on the sub-par girls and even obviously ignore the hot ones like spoiled kids when they try to interject. It's definitely a good way to tease and test them for high quality, and it shows that you're different, that they have to work for it. Enjoy the group as a whole, and when they've all decided you're chill you can take your shot with the hottie by dancing with her or talking to her about her sub par friends that you now have some intel on, "Rachel is so chill where did you find her?"

Don't try to force anything, it's like geopolitics, you want to keep a good relationship with the group. A lot of times you'll get a couple conversations out of it and a number of the 7 you vibed with, but that's still something to draw on next time you're going out.

You typically want to take your time rotating to the hot one, work the group for bit, maybe even try convincing them to go to another bar/club that you like better. And don't be afraid to decide they are just not up to your standards before politely exiting.

This is the most innocent strategy, there are other more sinister and effective ones, but you must prove you're ready for the dark arts.

Cold approaching groups during the day is different though, typically you want zip in and zip out, but it's very situational.
 
Last edited:

Plinco

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 29, 2008
Messages
1,600
Reaction score
846
typically you want zip in and zip out, but it's very situational.
I agree with everything except this part. Short conversations are usually a failure.

Cold approaching random women alone is already tough enough, but a while group is extremely hard to pull off. You have to entertain the entire group and somehow slowly isolate her away from the rest of the group. This is not an easy task by any means.

It is extremely rare during the day to ever see a woman out alone, they are almost always in groups or pairs. It doesn't matter if it's the shops,supermarket or just the streets, they always travel in groups.

How do you Cold approach when every woman is in a group.
If you can pull off getting girls from groups you'll have a massive advantage over other guys. Try to change your mindset so that when you see a liability, think about how it can be an asset to you.
 

SW15

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 31, 2020
Messages
6,146
Reaction score
5,478
You could get a wing and do approaches.

Also, you could not think about it and just approach. I approached a group of 2 yesterday after overhearing one was definitely single. However, approaching groups can be difficult, even with a good sense of confidence.
 

Warning!

Do not subscribe to The SoSuave Newsletter unless you are already a chick magnet!

The information in each issue of The SoSuave Newsletter is too powerful for most guys to handle. If you are an ordinary guy, it is not for you. It is meant for the elite few. Not the unwashed masses.

If you know you can handle it...

If you already have girls calling you at all hours of the day and night, showing up at your door, throwing themselves at you everywhere you go...

Then sign up below.

But if you're just an average Joe, an ordinary guy, no one special – then skip this. It is not for you.

thermodynamic

Don Juan
Joined
Aug 21, 2022
Messages
138
Reaction score
78
Ignore the group. Go for your target. I don't need to prove im "social" or any bull**** like that. I may interact with the group at my own choosing.
 

DEEZEDBRAH

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 24, 2017
Messages
6,070
Reaction score
4,794
Age
32
Cold approaching random women alone is already tough enough, but a while group is extremely hard to pull off. You have to entertain the entire group and somehow slowly isolate her away from the rest of the group. This is not an easy task by any means.

It is extremely rare during the day to ever see a woman out alone, they are almost always in groups or pairs. It doesn't matter if it's the shops,supermarket or just the streets, they always travel in groups.

How do you Cold approach when every woman is in a group.
Cannon ball in. Horrible success rate. Ideally role play and merge sets.
 

thermodynamic

Don Juan
Joined
Aug 21, 2022
Messages
138
Reaction score
78
Cannon ball in. Horrible success rate. Ideally role play and merge sets.
That works as well, but my strategy works too. It is more time effective but as you say proably a lower sucess rate. I have things to do though. I am not always in the mood to entertain a bunch of people I do not care about.
 

DEEZEDBRAH

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 24, 2017
Messages
6,070
Reaction score
4,794
Age
32
That works as well, but my strategy works too. It is more time effective but as you say proably a lower sucess rate. I have things to do though. I am not always in the mood to entertain a bunch of people I do not care about.
Pull or #nextset. Dtf or kindly **** off.
 

In2theGame

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 17, 2005
Messages
2,142
Reaction score
1,075
Age
39
Location
New York City
Have pulled many Women in a group. From as little as a group of 3 to a massive group of 15. No matter how hard you try, you're not going to be able to penetrate that group and totally ignore the targets friends so you do have to engage in some minor introductory at the beginning. At least that's how I did it.

I would go into the group and say something like "Excuse me ladies, I don't mean to bother you but I thought (Girl) was very beautiful and sexy"

At this point, they're either going to be receptive or not. It doesn't matter, what matters is that you opened and approached towards the girl that you wanted. Most times than not, they'll be automatically intrigued because it takes a certain level of confidence and balls to approach a group of Women. Most Men cannot do it confidently.
 

oldmanofthesea

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 23, 2018
Messages
1,561
Reaction score
3,084
Age
46
At this point, they're either going to be receptive or not. It doesn't matter, what matters is that you opened and approached towards the girl that you wanted. Most times than not, they'll be automatically intrigued because it takes a certain level of confidence and balls to approach a group of Women. Most Men cannot do it confidently.
Nailed it. You are a fvcking unicorn when you do this and it makes women wet.

There is no right or wrong way to do it but personally when I approach a group I tend to go indirect because women are so competitive with one another and if they know you are there for girl X, get ready for the fattest girl in the group (or literally all the other girls in the group except your target) to start trying to c0ck-block you with the fury of a Tasmanian devil. I like to approach the group and often compliment the whole of them. One line I very often use is, "Excuse me - I don't mean to interrupt your conversation but you all looked so cute that I just had to come over and meet you." If said with 100% confidence and no amount of nervousness it will make every girl there hope you are talking about her and it also makes them even more excited because no one does this - well, no one who isn't blind drunk on liquid courage and slurring his words which is something they often see and hate. At this point I will ask things of the group in general like, "So how do you all know each other?" and then expand the conversation from there. I will give less attention at first to the girl I'm targeting, but won't completely ignore her. If the interaction is going well, which looks like good conversation flow and at least a couple of girls trying to compete with one another to get the most words in response to my questions, that's when I will start directing more focus on my target girl and just VERY slowly faze out the other girls from the conversation. Usually it happens pretty naturally at this point - at a certain point the girls will just start talking to each other while I'm talking with the girl I liked.
 

devilkingx2

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 9, 2013
Messages
4,198
Reaction score
1,898
Location
NYC
I do a lot of my approaching at work these days (part time minimum wage at a crappy pharmacy/convenience store)

When approaching groups of girls I usually say "I like your styles ladies, where are you all from?".

If only one of them looks particularly good then I only address her style/hair/outfit and then I ask the group where they're from.

If more than one is receptive to conversation I'll ask for all of their Instagrams.

If only one is receptive then usually the other one will walk away or not talk much so it's basically a 1 on 1.

If they make an excuse to leave shortly after the open then none of them are interested. (Unless you get signs like one of them looking at you afterwards or coming back to where you are solo)

If I approach a group at a party hosted by someone I know, I just ask them how they know the host.
 

Rx Redpill

New Member
Joined
Sep 18, 2022
Messages
5
Reaction score
7
This is just one approach style of many;
Never approach the hottest girl (the one you're really after) directly or immediately. Start chatting with one of the 5s or 7s, and don't make it cheesy, pretend like she's a millionaire's daughter and you're just networking.

Talk about something in the present moment as an ice breaker "man this DJ is playing his guts out, why is he so sweaty though?", keep the banter light. Ignore the hot one and pretend like the conversation you're having with the 7 is getting super fun (sometimes it really is, they have richer personalities than the dimes 95% of the time). Laugh loudly when she cracks a joke, break the touch barrier, make it a way more fun conversation than what the other girls are talking about.

The 7 might introduce you to the group, but it's not necessary. You want them to slowly all glob onto you two because they're seeking a good time and you two seem to be having it. Most of the time if the hot one is interested in you she'll come over by you two and try to inject herself into the situation, because dimes can't stand when their sub-par friends are getting more attention than them, they've grown in an environment where they're always the center of attention so they project that. It also disarms the group to see one of their friendlier, nicer girls getting some love.

And that's usually it, you're in with the group. You can slowly draw the 8s, 9s, and 10s into the conversation for some social validation, or just tease them.

Most of the time it really drives the hot ones nuts if you continue focusing on the sub-par girls and even obviously ignore the hot ones like spoiled kids when they try to interject. It's definitely a good way to tease and test them for high quality, and it shows that you're different, that they have to work for it. Enjoy the group as a whole, and when they've all decided you're chill you can take your shot with the hottie by dancing with her or talking to her about her sub par friends that you now have some intel on, "Rachel is so chill where did you find her?"

Don't try to force anything, it's like geopolitics, you want to keep a good relationship with the group. A lot of times you'll get a couple conversations out of it and a number of the 7 you vibed with, but that's still something to draw on next time you're going out.

You typically want to take your time rotating to the hot one, work the group for bit, maybe even try convincing them to go to another bar/club that you like better. And don't be afraid to decide they are just not up to your standards before politely exiting.

This is the most innocent strategy, there are other more sinister and effective ones, but you must prove you're ready for the dark arts.

Cold approaching groups during the day is different though, typically you want zip in and zip out, but it's very situational.
Very well stated. I 100% endorse this way of thinking.

Ultimately you should offer value to the group instead of taking it. Only women have the ability to exist and offer no value.
 

thermodynamic

Don Juan
Joined
Aug 21, 2022
Messages
138
Reaction score
78
Nailed it. You are a fvcking unicorn when you do this and it makes women wet.

There is no right or wrong way to do it but personally when I approach a group I tend to go indirect because women are so competitive with one another and if they know you are there for girl X, get ready for the fattest girl in the group (or literally all the other girls in the group except your target) to start trying to c0ck-block you with the fury of a Tasmanian devil. I like to approach the group and often compliment the whole of them. One line I very often use is, "Excuse me - I don't mean to interrupt your conversation but you all looked so cute that I just had to come over and meet you." If said with 100% confidence and no amount of nervousness it will make every girl there hope you are talking about her and it also makes them even more excited because no one does this - well, no one who isn't blind drunk on liquid courage and slurring his words which is something they often see and hate. At this point I will ask things of the group in general like, "So how do you all know each other?" and then expand the conversation from there. I will give less attention at first to the girl I'm targeting, but won't completely ignore her. If the interaction is going well, which looks like good conversation flow and at least a couple of girls trying to compete with one another to get the most words in response to my questions, that's when I will start directing more focus on my target girl and just VERY slowly faze out the other girls from the conversation. Usually it happens pretty naturally at this point - at a certain point the girls will just start talking to each other while I'm talking with the girl I liked.
Seems like a good strategy, no doubt it works, but personally I do not like doing things I don't care for to talk to a girl. If I want something I will go for it. I do not need tricks or games to win my target over - she will probably like me by default.
 

oldmanofthesea

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 23, 2018
Messages
1,561
Reaction score
3,084
Age
46
Seems like a good strategy, no doubt it works, but personally I do not like doing things I don't care for to talk to a girl. If I want something I will go for it. I do not need tricks or games to win my target over - she will probably like me by default.
The "trick or game" isn't to win your target over - it is simply the application of social calibration and understanding female behavioral dynamics, and using that knowledge to your advantage. The reason for starting with less attention on your target is to try to get around c0ck-blocking from her friends, not to try to win your target girl over. Nothing triggers the c0ck-blockers more than a guy who approaches a group and immediately starts talking to the most physically attractive girl there. You see, the vast majority of modern women believe that men should give 0 value to a woman's appearance and if he does then he is a shallow D-bag and should be shamed. The more overweight and less attractive the woman, the stronger her conviction of this new "social rule." I only approach 7's and above. Due to the rarity of women this attractive in the general population, I have found that about 90% of the time, in any group with a girl who is a 7 or higher, the rest of the girls will be 3s, 4s, 5,s and 6's. In other words, there is usually a pretty wide gap between the hottest girl, and the runner-up. The girls are very aware of this and are jealous and insecure about it. So if you go straight for the hot one, your odds are high of the lesser-attractive girls trying to beat you down. I find that spreading my attention equally, with slightly less attention on the hot one, gets me over the initial hump with the other girls - they don't know who I'm there for, each of them are hoping they are the one, and because of this they don't demonize me. Once the conversation is going well, their guard is down, they like me, they start competing for me, and I then get more leeway with them and am able to start focusing more on the hot girl with a much lesser chance of getting c0ckblocked. Nothing is guaranteed but I have found this approach to be highly successful, assuming my target finds me attractive in the first place.

C0ck blockers can be dealt with and there is an appropriate way to respond to it, however, women are highly in-tune with their social group and even though they are competitive against one another, they also like to stick together. If all or a handful of the girls in the group are c0ck blocking you, even if you respond perfectly, the odds are still much less that the girl will be receptive to you even if she is attracted to you.
 

image

Put away your credit card.

You can now read our detailed guide to women and dating for free - Right Here!

SW15

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 31, 2020
Messages
6,146
Reaction score
5,478
"Mystery Method" was focusing on night venues and group approaching. However, Mystery did have a throwaway line on one page of the book that the method was also applicable in non-bar venues. Mystery + a wing might have approached groups of 4+.
 

RangerMIke

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 23, 2014
Messages
4,302
Reaction score
6,623
Location
USA, Louisiana
I thought everyone knew this....

You approach the group, talk to the group... then the women in the group that are interested will let you know, then you focus on her.

I guess the problem is too often a man will see a group of women, pick out one in the group and try to separate her from the herd like a wolf... this never works. Why? Because you think PUA bullcr@p works... It doesn't REALLY work. You can not get any woman you want... PERIOD. She has to want you first... all PUAs do is teach men to dress well and give men confidence when approaching, you never hit the shot you do not take. It's not the PUA stuff that works, it's the fact that you are not dressed like an idiot and you make an effort. At that point it's serendipity.
 

SW15

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 31, 2020
Messages
6,146
Reaction score
5,478
I thought everyone knew this....

You approach the group, talk to the group... then the women in the group that are interested will let you know, then you focus on her.
Group shiit is always a challenge, especially with a solo male dealing with 3-4 (or more) women. Even if there is awareness, in practice, it is difficult. Roosh believed women in groups of 4+ were not serious about meeting men. He liked to keep his female groups to 2-3. I've had similar experiences as a solo artist. Additionally, in non-bar approaching, it's more likely you can get a woman already isolated, though even this seems to happen less and less.
 

VirtuousD

Don Juan
Joined
May 28, 2022
Messages
29
Reaction score
11
Age
29
I would go into the group and say something like "Excuse me ladies, I don't mean to bother you but I thought (Girl) was very beautiful and sexy"
Good grief! You've actually had success with that? Would have thought complementing their looks straight away was a no go in this day and age.
 

In2theGame

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 17, 2005
Messages
2,142
Reaction score
1,075
Age
39
Location
New York City
Good grief! You've actually had success with that? Would have thought complementing their looks straight away was a no go in this day and age.
Yes absolutely.

I've always let the Women I'm interested in know that I found them beautiful and sexy. Never had a problem with it.
 
Top