How do you become an alpha male?

[ArgeeBargee]

So my girlfriend broke up with 2 weeks ago and is now seeing some rich bodybuilding nut from out of town. He's tall,ripped and got loads of cash. She broke up with me because apparently I was "no fun". The first week I cried nearly everday and now I'm just coming to terms with it all.

So I do I become the guy all woman want to get with rather than the loser that cries over his gf breaking up with him?

any advice will be appreciated.

 

[Locogooner]

1. The girl sound like a hoe-bag gold digger. You got rid of her at a good time.
2. The guy is tall,ripped and loaded? you got his number just joking
3. Crying over it is pretty beta and you must realize there are MANY MANY more girls out there.

4. I feel like your definition of alpha is being a rich guy with big muscles. well NO.
Being alpha is a state of mind, the ability to what you want and not get affected by the needs and troubles of others.

James Bond is the PERFECT example of alphamale imo. He never argues with women, never stoops to their level and always remains calm and respectful at the same time. Too many guys confuse being alpha with being a douche.

In fact if you're really struggling theres an ebook online for all this stuff.

www.casanovareview.com

^I think you'll find it there.

 

[demezel]

go to google and search the book of pook, it will clear you eyes on how you get to the state of mind that is an Alpha.... anyway you came to the right place

 

[dutchmaster]

Another big thing about being alpha is make sure you assert yourself over other Alphas. Naturally the alpha male will challenge the other ones in the room whether you even realize it or not.

For example: the original AMOG in our group of friends came back from college last night, but while he was gone I developed into the AMOG and we kept subconsciously challenging each other trying to see who the real AMOG is. it's odd I can't explain it that well but it's mostly body language. Research Alpha Male body language and characteristics to become one, best way if you aren't naturally one

 

[Chamber36]

step 1: grow a handlebar mustache.
step 2: shave your head
step 3: don't wear sleeves.
step 4: do bicep curls
step 5: when you drink beer, let the foam sit on your mustache.
step 6: bring some tension into your forehead; look angry like Mr T.

that should do the trick.

 

[Iceberg]

As opposed to asking a very basic question, you should probably read the "Tips" section of the forum, and the DJ Bible.

 

[zekko]

step 1: grow a handlebar mustache.
step 2: shave your head
step 3: don't wear sleeves.
step 4: do bicep curls
step 5: when you drink beer, let the foam sit on your mustache.
step 6: bring some tension into your forehead; look angry like Mr T.

Do the bicep curls with kettlebells, that goes better with the handlebar moustache, and the beer foam sitting on it.

 

[Aaron B]

respect yourself enough that you refuse to be a p.ussy

that's pretty much it

 

[Mike32ct]

An alpha faces his fears. Figure out what you need to do to improve your life. Whether it's approach women, take classes, find a better job, work out, etc. A lot of these things will be hard work and scary. Face these challenges head on. It's a great confidence builder.

 

[Strelok]

Try to see what kind of man you want to be, then ask yourself which actions are usually done from that kind of man and act accordingly.

Obviously its gradual, you aint going to bench 100kg on your first day at the gym but you can start bench pressing that is for sure better than not doing anything and then push more and more.

Self confidence is important, problem is that self confidence comes from victories and victories comes from action.
There's also that kind of self confidence that comes through experience wheter you win it or not, that kind of self confidence when you say "I endured worse so Im cold as ice".

It's not easy and not everybody can do it, otherwise there would be no beta.
As a starting point do what mike said, face your fears and if life is a b1tch to you, act accordingly and fvck her ass.

The shortest way is through risks, the more you take the more you feel better, balls are like lazy student...they need a lot of stimulation to wake up.

 

[Jariel]

It takes a lot of practice and a lot of effort. There's nothing stopping you from having muscles, confidence and even money. You need to do your research, then work towards your goals.

A lot of guys in the pickup community will try to fake being an alpha male, but you should see how quickly that falls apart when they're on the spot. If it was that easy, there'd be no such thing as a beta male.

 

[st_99]

In a word: education.

What you're doing right now, inquiring, wondering, and trying to understand, is where it starts.

Then you get some knowledge, go through some trial and error, work towards things, fail at some stuff, keep going, etc.. and then you become alpha. Basically its a journey, if you want it, you'll get it.

 

[floydb25]

How old are you, and this girl? What were you looking for? What was your relationship like - how did you act and what did you do? I have an idea on these, but will let you answer first.

The key in your post is that you were no fun. I heard that before... Girls told me I needed to be more exciting. But these girls were young, immature, and only wanted sex. They were also hot and popular, and loved the party / drama lifestyle... All about the status... Not the best to get with for a relationship.

It might not always be you, but the type of women you go after, what your intentions are, and how you approach the situation. Not everyone is relationship material. Judging by this girl, and her shallow standards - she probably isn't one. You probably wouldn't be crying if there were no attachments, so this is probably a case of looking for love in the wrong places. Probably a mix of desperation and low self-esteem, as well.

 

[Alex DeLarge]

The path to becoming an alpha male is difficult yet simple..

You have to purely experience life, make mistakes, and learn from them.

Example:
I was a typical AFC shy nice guy before finding this site. I would always give women respect even if they were disrespectful toward me.. I thought it was "creepy" to ask a girl out on a date and so on..

From coming to this site, I learned it's okay to be sexual with women, and from learning so had literally doubled my success in the past 6 or 7 months since I first talked to a girl that I liked when I was 12 or 13. I'm 22 now.

Obviously, I am still not an alpha male.. But I am making steps in that direction. I really don't think anyone can truly be alpha without experiencing life for what it is and reflecting upon it in an optimistic way. Mistakes are not horrendous life ruining events, they are life-learning events.


Another example. Non-chick related
When my band first hit the road, we were all around 18 years old.. Never worked with promoters before, weren't on a record label, and were going at it for the first time. Our first show of the tour only had 10 people sitting at a bar not giving a sh1t about us being there..

After losing about $2000 off of this venture, I wisened up. I got a lot better at promoting ourselves, demanded a guarantee price for our performance to promoters, and networked more.

2 weeks ago we played a sold out show in New York City.. I mean it was a relatively small bar, but playing a sold out show in New York City felt damn good.

Now this experience I had just posted about is exactly what I'm talking about.. We went for our dreams of touring, we failed pretty badly, but I took the step forward to learn in a positive optimistic manner about it, and was rewarded later in life.

 

[ArgeeBargee]

How old are you, and this girl? What were you looking for? What was your relationship like - how did you act and what did you do? I have an idea on these, but will let you answer first.

The key in your post is that you were no fun. I heard that before... Girls told me I needed to be more exciting. But these girls were young, immature, and only wanted sex. They were also hot and popular, and loved the party / drama lifestyle... All about the status... Not the best to get with for a relationship.

It might not always be you, but the type of women you go after, what your intentions are, and how you approach the situation. Not everyone is relationship material. Judging by this girl, and her shallow standards - she probably isn't one. You probably wouldn't be crying if there were no attachments, so this is probably a case of looking for love in the wrong places. Probably a mix of desperation and low self-esteem, as well.

both 19. Been going out for 6 months. I was always respectful to her and even when we argued I never got mad. Other thing is, her last boyfriends were all big pompous dudes with badboy attitudes. When she met me she said she was after a "nice guy".

 

[sexysuave]

You need to go back to the basics. First of all, NEVER, EVER, cry for a week because some hoe-bag left you. I mean, common dude,,, you're 19 years old?? YOu need to brush that sh*t off and move to the next one..

She probably DID want a "nice guy" (or think she wants one), but she wants and what she responds to are 2 different things.. She responds to someone who has more balls.. So while you can be a "nice guy",, hell, I hate that word,, you can be a "good person", but you have to be courageous as well... in other words, don't let her run all over you like she did...

It is OK to get mad sometimes.. if you're pissed off you're pissed off, and it is OK to stand up for your self.. and quite truthfully, at 19 years old, you need to be testestorone filled idiot to get the most chicks at that age.. lol.. just the way it is.. not saying you'll become this guy or even want to be this guy, but understand some of the qualities that attract women to that type of guy:

1) you don't really give a sh*t about ANYTHING

2) you game up multiple girls and she knows other girls want you (don't get busted, but feel free to date other girls on the side.. look, chances are, you're not gonna marry this chick,,or any chick at this age.. you will be TONS more confident if you got like 4 or 5 girls on the side,, this will help you with step number 1 listed above .. you don't care if one leaves because you have all these other ones, yhou pretty much dont' even think about it.. one day hopefully you'll get to the point where if you stop seeing some girl you might not even realize it until she texts you months later for a "catch uP' and you be like "awww damn, I forgot all about that girl" lol... that's a good place to be at

3) You LEAD the relationship and you're the "boss".. For the most part, they all want that.. regardless of waht they say.. dont' talk about it verbally,, don't tell her "yes, I wanna lead this relationship so let me be the boss".. Just do it!! take the lead and they will follow.. hell, MOST people, men and women, will follow.. deep down, most people are looking for a leader.. so do what you need to acquire some leadership abilities.. or better yet, just start doing in.. start leading, and watch people follow

4) Don't let ANYONE talk down to you,, anywhere.. always stand up for your self..

5) Work out.. just start going to gym and working out.. This will help you become a little more agressive and the muscles don't hurt.. if you keep at it,, you will sometimes get girls just because they like your body.. hey,, maybe this is not what you want, but this is one of those "quality problems" .. oh, and for a shameless promo, make sure you get your workout supplements from me (www.supps4us.com)

6) Set goals and work towards accomplishing them.. I think someone else mentioned this.. experience and actually doing things.. so set goals each week, and do your best to accomplish them..

7) Approach at least 15 girls per week.. this is an EASY goal.. at this stage, you don't care how many numbers you get, or don't get,, your only goal is to approach 15 girls and TRY to get their number, whether you do or not, doesn't matter.. If you think this number is too large,, think again.. you can go to the mall and in 2 HOURS get this entire goal taken care of.. in one day, only 2 hours.. So up to you where yo uapproach them,, you can do it anywhere and everywhere.. NEVER hestitate because of a venue.. I've picked up girls anywhere you can think of, from job interviews, to gas statiions, to sporting events, airports, airplanes, grocery stores, I mean ANYWHERE.. always be ready..

8) Use the 3 second rule: When you see a decent looking chick, approach her within 3 SECONDS.. never break it and never hesitate.. just dont' even think about it.. go up and just say something.. yeah, sometimes her boyfriend will be there, but usually you will figure this out and nothing bad comes from it.. and sometimes you'll find out that she's just with some friends and one of them is a guy "friend" and you can still pick her up.. If you didn't use the 3 second rule and spent too much time thinking and analyzing, you would have talked your self out of this approach because you will probably use an excuse that she is with the dude... so trust me, just approach right away.. 3 seconds or less..

9) Make moves on girls! If you're alone with a girl.. KISS HER.. if she kisses you back, proceed making further moves on her.. and if you can hit it, then hit it, even if it's the first time you're hanging out.. you'll lose your chance with some girls because you dont' escalate things.. OHH while we're at it,, did you f*ck that 19 year old you were dating?? to be quite honest, maybe that's why she left.. if you didn't f*ck her.. so just be honest with us.. did you hit it??

10) Get back to the basics!! I gotta get going now.. I could keep writing forever, but the bottom line is, MAN UP, make moves, talk to AS MANY girls as you can, and you probably need to read some books also for some basics.. try with the dj bible here and the book of pook.. I'm pretty sure those are free.. not sure where you can find 'em but I know I've seen people post links and what not, so look around, or just search for it..

And NEVER, EVER cry because some chick left you!!!!!!! Thnk about it,, that's some p*ssy sh*t right there!! Man up!!!!

 

[Diaforetikos]

Have you tried going outside?

 

[floydb25]

both 19. Been going out for 6 months. I was always respectful to her and even when we argued I never got mad. Other thing is, her last boyfriends were all big pompous dudes with badboy attitudes. When she met me she said she was after a "nice guy".

Typical scenario you're having. She said she wanted a nice guy, so you became that guy - only to find her losing interest. That's why you don't give women what they say they want - you follow what they respond to. In many instances, what they respond to is what they claim to hate. Yeah, its weird like that.

You also don't want to go to extremes based on their claims. If she hates jerks - don't go to the opposite extreme, and become the super sweet, non-challenging, overly accommodating and friendly nice guy. This is never effective. Don't take their words too literally. You must always act like an assertive, confident, independent, secure man, and you must always ATTRACT them - by being sexual, light-hearted, exciting, funny, playful... The nice guy relationship stuff can come later, but must still be balanced.

Her age and past has a lot to do with what she's doing. People seek after what is familiar. If abuse is love to them - that's what they will seek out. 19 isn't an age where people are emotionally mature, or know much of what they're doing. They don't think - they just do - then complain about the consequences. They're all about the excitement, popularity, drama, "hot" people to show off, etc. They still very much have the high school mentality.

Finally, just because she's looking for a nice guy - doesn't mean SHE is nice herself, or will be appreciative of someone who is. This is what you need to look for, as well. Do they actually deserve someone like this?

What you're going through is normal. A lot of nice guys seek after girls who seek after bad boys. That's usually where the problem starts. Just because she complains about them - doesn't mean she doesn't seek after them. Always follow their actions. Most people are all talk and no action; saying one thing, and doing another. Never, EVER assume or believe anything, or rush in heart first without knowing the other person first.

 

[PatrickChase]

Video Response

So my girlfriend broke up with 2 weeks ago and is now seeing some rich bodybuilding nut from out of town. He's tall,ripped and got loads of cash. She broke up with me because apparently I was "no fun". The first week I cried nearly everday and now I'm just coming to terms with it all.

So I do I become the guy all woman want to get with rather than the loser that cries over his gf breaking up with him?

any advice will be appreciated.

Hey ArgeeBargee, I made a quick video response to your question:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=26hdZIbXS5w

Hope that helps!

~Patrick