"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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How do u kno if relationship ended due to jealousy or ***** just bein crazy

Dondudda

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Ok just to clear the air this isnt some "pls i just broke up, help me get my girl back post."
I'd like to learn from this hell of a relationship i've been through because i rly dont have any other long term ones to compare it too. we were together on n off for 2 years.

Now a big thing is the chick in question was bi-polar so that right off the bat tells you alot. She also of course had a ****load of guys "friends" that mostly big fags, but some of them had this rep of bein cool(idk how, but we were from very diff towns rich/poor). Her only excuse havin so many dudes around is she was raised by her oldest brother and in alotta ways shes very tomboy like; rode bmx, likes sports, blah blah. i tried very hard to not let it bother me that that she had more guy friends than i did but it would slip out sometimes and i'd berate her verbally about it.

So onto my point. I'm guessin if ur gunna be with a chick like this(never had any plans on marrying her but we did have ALOT of fun times together and i wasnt ready just yet to move on[wouldve liked to have a chick on the side at least]) u just gotta have rock solid inner game goin on, am i right?

Cuz everything between us was cool until i'd start to act "jealous", even if my reason was justified. Like if i left the room n came back to find her laughing n some male friend like had his arm around her or touched her during the joke(kino type ish) or was just way too close to her in general; sum shyt like that, hopefully u know what i mean like not gropin her but just too close ya kno. I never knew how to react to that, like do i punch dude in the face? do i flirt hard with the nearest decent lookin chick(which was pretty effective becuz of course she could be crazy jealous, i think because she would think the worst n compare it to what she did when i wasnt around)? or, the basis of all our fights, do i confront her and be like wtf u hoe, dont be touchin other dudes?? and in turn i look like a jealous psycho n she wins.

Alittle background on me these last 2 yrs: To be fully honest, my life is kinda sh!tty atm. I'm livin paycheck to paycheck, got a sh!ty ass car, and dont rly have anything goin on(like fun sh!t to do or cool plans/vacations, or a good job w. a future). But i do got an apt tho which is cool but i'm too broke to rly do anything, esp. the last cpl months. Only thing, and sometimes more of a curse then a blessing, im RLY good at reading ppl. Like what theyre intentions are, if they lie, sh!t like that but its been useless lately. Also i dont rly have many real friends, and the ones i do have we havent been doin any cool sh!t lately(when i first started chillin w. her things were very diff, i had a decent amt of sh!t goin on. BUT i also had no car, no license, a place, or a JOB!! lol and she was way more into me than, ha figures.)

I just feel like me n my life are very boring right now and i have no idea what to do about it. Plus she always had WAY more friends then me and it seemed like they always had some cool **** goin on. And towards the end of my relationship w this chick when we hung out, we only chilled by ourselfs, not with my friends or hers(cuz mine sucked[also i couldnt help but feel she was like flirting w/ some of them] and hers either hated on me or i just fluckin hated them myself).

Like to all the real don juans out there, how do u keep your cool around a whole bunch of dude friends of a girl when theyre laughin, makin jokes, seeming cool and i'm there like, ALL this kids are fags and would most def never survive where n how i grew up.

I just feel like i failed test after test with this chick(even tho she is crazy). And i'd kno i was doin it i just couldnt help it. Like to be RLY honest we hung out like EVERY damn day for the first 2 months or so. Than she started askin me to be her bf and i just kept puttin it off, puttin it off till i was finally like ok lets do it. And at that moment i could just feel air rushing out of our relationship like my mystery was gone and she found out i was fakin all of this ****.

Are all realtionships like this? Is there always this constant battle for the upper hand? I'm guessin in normal relationships there isnt, but it is tru that if u can keep a bi-polar chick in line then u could keep any chick in line?(andd i dont mean like beating her when i say keep in line, i mean keeping her all about u and on ur d!ck only)
I mean one thing i couldnt compete w/ is that she wanted to go out n do something almost every night of the week and i lost count of how many nights i went out even tho i had no interest in doin so, and had work at freakin 6am. i guess i f'ed up there a bit, but i didnt want her chillin w those fags w/o me around cuz they all talked sh!t about me and would flirt w/ her when i wasnt around(even tho MOST of them had no chance in hell, it still made me blackout angry)

Idk i just feel like i'm faking ALL of this. confidence, being happy, being tuff, cool, whatever. i feel like its all this big act and theres like a ticker goin off when i meet a chick that starts counting down till she finds this out, that i'm fakin it all, and that i'm just an almost 30 yr old that doesnt have any positive **** goin on, no college, no history, ****ty job(i mean it pays good but i hate it) and just general loserishness goin on.

And with this chick fellas help me out cuz i still have some of her **** and gotta get it back to her at sum point. How in the hell do i proceed from here? just drop her **** off w/o seein her? have her friend drop my stuff off? never call or contact her again? and just a fyi its too soon and i wont be able to handle seein her w/ another dude. Altho a friend did tell me he saw a pic of her on facebook w/ another dude so i'm tryin to not let that bother me.
So just analyze that pls vets around here and see what u can come up with pls!
A main question of mine is how do u deal with dudes trying to game ur chick? that a big q of mine but also how to proceed now that its ovr. and other sh!t too i cant remember cuz i ended up typing wayy too much. Thanks so much if u read this whole sh!t.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Alex DeLarge

Master Don Juan
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It doesn't matter why it ended, it's over. Move on and bang other chicks.

The only thing you can learn from past relationships is that you may have given her respect when it was not earned to begin with, recognize that, and move on.
 

Dondudda

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i appreciate u takin the time to answer my post but i did have some specific questions throughout the post that id rly like answered. i'd like to kno so that in the future i dont make the same mistakes.

Yes there def. musta be times i gave her too much respect but i have no idea when. Maybe by not checkin her when she acted inappropiate, but i dont even kno what appropriate is anymore.

how do i go about moving on when i'm not sure how? how do i rekindle certain friendships, how do i improve myself while not being a lonely miserable bastard in the mean time? how do i go about makin my life so not boring with a ****ty job that barely pays the bills? i mean some of this stuff no one here can help with other shyt i feel like someone has been through and they can share how they dug themselves out of a hole and reinvented themselves. If there is anyone out there that has thats reading this, pls share w me.
 

tomato

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Dondudda said:
i appreciate u takin the time to answer my post but i did have some specific questions throughout the post that id rly like answered. i'd like to kno so that in the future i dont make the same mistakes.

Yes there def. musta be times i gave her too much respect but i have no idea when. Maybe by not checkin her when she acted inappropiate, but i dont even kno what appropriate is anymore.

how do i go about moving on when i'm not sure how? how do i rekindle certain friendships, how do i improve myself while not being a lonely miserable bastard in the mean time? how do i go about makin my life so not boring with a ****ty job that barely pays the bills? i mean some of this stuff no one here can help with other shyt i feel like someone has been through and they can share how they dug themselves out of a hole and reinvented themselves. If there is anyone out there that has thats reading this, pls share w me.
didnt read all of it - but I can tell you calling her out on having too many guy freinds never works - you just have to get lots of girl friends and hang out with them - then she will get jealous, tell you not to and then stop herself - I realised this too late aswell....
 
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