so i am a junior at high school and this freshmen girl who is really cute and has a personality is who i like. i never talked to her but shes got a lot of friends and is a cheerleader but i know she is single. also she is pretty shy but around her friends she is outgoing which is simliar to how i am. the thing is she seems to have a lot of friends, both girl and guy. how do you think i should talk to her first because we also look at each other and i don't want to make it awkward.
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
how do i talk to her
- Thread starter MikePablo
- Start date
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
NorwegianDJ
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Apr 8, 2010
- Messages
- 2,553
- Reaction score
- 83
First off, theres more girls. Start going for several.
Just talk to her, thats the only way to talk to her.
"Hey, Im Mike"
"Hey, I thought you looked cute. Im Mike"
Yeah.
Just talk to her, thats the only way to talk to her.
"Hey, Im Mike"
"Hey, I thought you looked cute. Im Mike"
Yeah.
NorwegianDJ
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Apr 8, 2010
- Messages
- 2,553
- Reaction score
- 83
Well what are you gonna do then?
Give me a brainstorm.
Give me a brainstorm.
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
BPH
Master Don Juan
Hey Zenith...listen to me or don't listen to me but there is no way you are going to bag this girl without putting forth some effort
NorwegianDJ
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Apr 8, 2010
- Messages
- 2,553
- Reaction score
- 83
Dude, do a proper brainstorm.
It's just the hallways. When you see her, walk up to her and tell her "Hey, (instert awesome picup line here)" (Sorry for not being creative).
"Hey, Im Mike. You're cute, I just had to meet you."
Anything you're comfortable with really. Just express intent/interest in some 'subtle' way.
???
"I gotta head to class/buddies w/e, I'll see you later babe."
???
PROFIT.
It's just the hallways. When you see her, walk up to her and tell her "Hey, (instert awesome picup line here)" (Sorry for not being creative).
"Hey, Im Mike. You're cute, I just had to meet you."
Anything you're comfortable with really. Just express intent/interest in some 'subtle' way.
???
"I gotta head to class/buddies w/e, I'll see you later babe."
???
PROFIT.
I understand what you are saying but pick up lines just seem really cheesy and I really don't think it will work to be honest. I really never heard of someone from my school who got a girl through a pick up line. I am not that tall and pretty skinny so its not like I am going to make her love me through a pickup line. And every time I see her she is either talking to a friend (s) or texting on her phone. I think I'll just wait until she talks to me first.
You really don't wait for the perfect moment for the simple fact that there is no perfect moment. You make it happen.
Right, you must be authentic. Be genuinely interested, but not needy. Show intention and desire. You want her, but you don't need her.
She will probably always be in a group of people. Go in. Try to involve all the group in the conversation. Isolate. Boom!
Right, you must be authentic. Be genuinely interested, but not needy. Show intention and desire. You want her, but you don't need her.
She will probably always be in a group of people. Go in. Try to involve all the group in the conversation. Isolate. Boom!
kingxxxman
Don Juan
- Joined
- Jun 14, 2010
- Messages
- 161
- Reaction score
- 2
Just introduce yourself... i personally don't find the cute thing to work well specially cause im not that type of guy to say it.
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
I'm in the Mood
Master Don Juan
One thing I want to point out is that you seem to think it matters whether she's single or not. At your stage, it DOESN'T MATTER, because you aren't even in the position to want to date her. You've never talked to her and you don't really know anything about her other than what everyone else who doesn't know her personally probably knows.
To answer your question, the truth is, the only way to talk to her is to talk to her.
To answer your question, the truth is, the only way to talk to her is to talk to her.
In my school there is this girl who is a freshman and has competed and placed first in beauty pageants. What I did is just added her on facebook and liked on of her photos and said she looked pretty. It's just an easy way to initiate since people do it all the time. Now when I see her in school and she walks by my hallway she always looks at me and smiles so I make eye contact with her until she goes to class. I haven't even talked to her yet but I could easily because she can tell I am friendly which would make it much easier. So you could try doing what I did with using facebook which is very simple and effective.
NorwegianDJ
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Apr 8, 2010
- Messages
- 2,553
- Reaction score
- 83
Dude. Seriously.
You're deliberately ignoring huge chunks of advice posted and honing in on things you can make excuses of.
Also, there's tons of other girls.
You're not that kind of person? WTF is that. That's like saying "I cant play football, Im not that kind of person."
YOU PRACTICE IT, ITS NOT SOMETHING YOURE BORN WITH.
"Im too nervous to talk to her, thats just who I am."
Dude, thats who we all were. THEN WE CHANGED. GO CHANGE. Change starts with RIGHT ACTION.
Wanna know what RIGHT ACTION is in this case? TALKING TO HER. She's not gonna talk to you. It's unnatural.
You're deliberately ignoring huge chunks of advice posted and honing in on things you can make excuses of.
Also, there's tons of other girls.
You're not that kind of person? WTF is that. That's like saying "I cant play football, Im not that kind of person."
YOU PRACTICE IT, ITS NOT SOMETHING YOURE BORN WITH.
"Im too nervous to talk to her, thats just who I am."
Dude, thats who we all were. THEN WE CHANGED. GO CHANGE. Change starts with RIGHT ACTION.
Wanna know what RIGHT ACTION is in this case? TALKING TO HER. She's not gonna talk to you. It's unnatural.
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
cococrispy
Don Juan
- Joined
- Oct 1, 2010
- Messages
- 39
- Reaction score
- 0
What???MikePablo said:
Stop making excuses, seriously.
I used to think I was shy all the time (and I thought that was a good thing, that's what my mom told me, LOL). And then, I realized how much full of crap that is (to say that you are just that way, and you can't change).
MOST OF US BEGIN AS BEING SHY! Then, a couple years ago, I started to initiate talking to people a lot, and now I really don't care about what other people think of me. Try to get rid of fear, because it doesn't help.
Facebook/formspring are just excuses so that you don't have to face her in person.
I would suggest reading the Book of Pook, so that you can know more about how you should be. I think you should work out more too, so you can get more energy.
Follow what NorwegianDJ says, he has a good reputation, unlike some of the posters here.
Yeah man facebook isn't bad but formspring can seem creepy at times. I've used it once ealrier last year and I ended up talking to this girl cause I knew her in like 5th grade. I didn't let it sound creepy and I actually saw her the next week at a party and I let her know I was the one that posted the comment because I wrote a compliment and she was wondering who it was she told me. I ended up hooking up with her that night and she had a boyfriend for 2 years.... And as for Coco's post. Facebook does work because I've used it to talk to girls and they have used it to talk to me. They will look at your photos and stuff and at least it's a way to connect because in high school it can seem creepy walking up to a girl randomly but 'liking' or commenting on a photo is normal. Also, the fact I don't have many posts is cause I joined last night but I throw in my opinion because I have hooked up with at least 10 chicks and I'm a junior which is pretty good in my opinion.MikePablo said:
Mostly basically everything but sex for most of them because in my town a lot of girls are slutty but won't have sex unless your dating. And I don't like having girlfriends cause I get bored easilyMikePablo said:
but the girls are dope cause I have high standards, only like a few lower ones due to bad decisions when I'm drunk. But this thread isn't about me haha, have you said anything to that girl yet?
BPH
Master Don Juan
Zenith next time I get on Xbox you're gettin chewed out
“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.