How do I slow my mind down?

[Tuppy]

Hey fellas,

I used to treat people with almost perfect ease and act naturally etc. About 2 years ago this changed and now Its harder for me to enjoy interaction with other people because my mind races during conversations. I've picked up a habit of trying to understand why certain people act the way they do, from the moment I meet them I try to understand what they're most insecure about, if they are comfortable talking to me, if they are socially capable people, introverted vs extroverted, does this person need other peoples approval or not, how long will this person hold eye contact etc.

I don't know how normal it is to do this or what I exactly gain from doing this but it interests me but the downside is that I'm never relaxed in during conversations anymore. I don't think people notice that my mind races like this because in person I know how to act like a confident person that seems relaxed etc the main issue is that I'm not acting natural anymore I feel like I need to cover a part of me up and its pissing me off.

How do I stop analyzing people and just chill its almost like an anxiety I've acquired and when I try not to think about it all I can think about, is it.

 

[Dallers]

Hey fellas,

I used to treat people with almost perfect ease and act naturally etc. About 2 years ago this changed and now Its harder for me to enjoy interaction with other people because my mind races during conversations. I've picked up a habit of trying to understand why certain people act the way they do, from the moment I meet them I try to understand what they're most insecure about, if they are comfortable talking to me, if they are socially capable people, introverted vs extroverted, does this person need other peoples approval or not, how long will this person hold eye contact etc.

I don't know how normal it is to do this or what I exactly gain from doing this but it interests me but the downside is that I'm never relaxed in during conversations anymore. I don't think people notice that my mind races like this because in person I know how to act like a confident person that seems relaxed etc the main issue is that I'm not acting natural anymore I feel like I need to cover a part of me up and its pissing me off.

How do I stop analyzing people and just chill its almost like an anxiety I've acquired and when I try not to think about it all I can think about, is it.

New here but a long time reader.

I can relate very well to this. It not only affects you as a person because you over think and analyse everything during and after but it makes you very picky as well. You suss out a person and although you are not always right you become so good at it you can actually use it to your advantage. The problem is everything has a negative side. You will waste hours thinking about things when actually you could be doing things you enjoy doing and it waxes and wanes on your mind.

I bet you this has come from experience and building confidence in yourself to the point that you are above the norm. I find that now I rarely connect with anyone but when I do it is an amazing connection because I disregard anyone that my mind believes is a waste of my time. I do not think you can just change this you just might need to control it like I am doing. If it does not feel right with the person you are talking to then that is this 6th sense you have acquired saying "Next". I get it all the time and although I seem distant or lacking in confidence it is not that it is that I see through person as inferior or fake.

 

[ace88]

New here but a long time reader.

I can relate very well to this. It not only affects you as a person because you over think and analyse everything during and after but it makes you very picky as well. You suss out a person and although you are not always right you become so good at it you can actually use it to your advantage. The problem is everything has a negative side. You will waste hours thinking about things when actually you could be doing things you enjoy doing and it waxes and wanes on your mind.

I bet you this has come from experience and building confidence in yourself to the point that you are above the norm. I find that now I rarely connect with anyone but when I do it is an amazing connection because I disregard anyone that my mind believes is a waste of my time. I do not think you can just change this you just might need to control it like I am doing. If it does not feel right with the person you are talking to then that is this 6th sense you have acquired saying "Next". I get it all the time and although I seem distant or lacking in confidence it is not that it is that I see through person as inferior or fake.

I agree 100% with Dallers. Its a matter of realising that you have this gift/burden, you can't switch it off and the more you get used to it, the better you live with it and I tell you its a good weapon for yourself. Only problem is you can't really talk about this to anyone cos you just sound like an arrogant prick. I feel you m8!:rockon:

 

[Dallers]

I agree 100% with Dallers. Its a matter of realising that you have this gift/burden, you can't switch it off and the more you get used to it, the better you live with it and I tell you its a good weapon for yourself. Only problem is you can't really talk about this to anyone cos you just sound like an arrogant prick. I feel you m8!:rockon:

This in a nutshell. It is a weapon but you think of it is as a weakness. Plus most girls will see it as arrogance.

It only appears a weakness because you are limiting your options. But you are limiting options that you have analysed as weak and going nowhere. Sadly you might not always be right as I have found out but still you have to trust in yourself. I look at this ability now as something extra, girls are either head F or run a mile from me but some fall right into my lap. Those ones have something worth reaching the bedroom for...

 

[stevo]

One way to cope with it is find what triggers it also when having conversations and you feel your mind drifting, consciously try to stay focused in the convo. Ask questions or do the talking. It's natural for most to even day dream if the convo doesnt spark your interest.

 

[BraddH]

Chill down.

 

[Rainman4707]

You know what you have to do, your just having a little trouble doing it.

It's really frustrating yes.

You have to overcome this

If it's causing you so much worry then maybe it's best to just concentrate on the conversation & relax.

I realise all this is easier said than done, but yeah CHILL OUT.

Get fu*king angry with yourself for doing it.

 

[ace88]

... but yeah CHILL OUT.

Get fu*king angry with yourself for doing it.

apart from all the we might have reached... the quote above is what you need to do. :box:

 

[Aware]

Hey fellas,

I used to treat people with almost perfect ease and act naturally etc. About 2 years ago this changed and now Its harder for me to enjoy interaction with other people because my mind races during conversations. I've picked up a habit of trying to understand why certain people act the way they do, from the moment I meet them I try to understand what they're most insecure about, if they are comfortable talking to me, if they are socially capable people, introverted vs extroverted, does this person need other peoples approval or not, how long will this person hold eye contact etc.

I don't know how normal it is to do this or what I exactly gain from doing this but it interests me but the downside is that I'm never relaxed in during conversations anymore. I don't think people notice that my mind races like this because in person I know how to act like a confident person that seems relaxed etc the main issue is that I'm not acting natural anymore I feel like I need to cover a part of me up and its pissing me off.

How do I stop analyzing people and just chill its almost like an anxiety I've acquired and when I try not to think about it all I can think about, is it.

I got a question for you. Has your sense of responsibility over your family and friends increased since you started acting like this?

 

[jimmy18]

Meditation helps.

I've also found that drinking alcohol helps me think less, even on subsequent days, but I wouldn't drink just for that.

 

[ace88]

Meditation helps.

I've also found that drinking alcohol helps me think less, even on subsequent days, but I wouldn't drink just for that.

Yeah dude that works but you kill your brain.... you cant do any work. You really cant think

 

[ace88]

I got a question for you. Has your sense of responsibility over your family and friends increased since you started acting like this?

Why do you take that into account? over thinking and analyzing happens to fill the gap of what you don't know and you try and fill it through rationalizations of information that you have or you assume thanks to patterns that can be created over time.

Do I make sense?

 

[Bokanovsky]

Get a life. And I don't mean that disrespectfully.

Propensity to overanalyze is a sign of an idle mind. When your brain is preoccupied with more important things, you will have neither the desire nor the capacity to adopt such paralyzing thought patterns.

 

[gov87]

I got a question for you. Has your sense of responsibility over your family and friends increased since you started acting like this?

I would like to know the answer to this and also what you getting at by asking this question? I think I have an idea why and it's a great thing to ask.

 

[uadialej]

It only appears a weakness because you are limiting your options. But you are limiting options that you have analysed as weak and going nowhere. Sadly you might not always be right as I have found out but still you have to trust in yourself. I look at this ability now as something extra, girls are either head F or run a mile from me but some fall right into my lap. Those ones have something worth reaching the bedroom for...











My Ex Is Dating Someone Else Already