"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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How do I play this....

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zen511

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Ok well about a week ago I had a first date things went well, called and as soon as I got on the phone she wanted to know when we I was free to go out, bc she knows we both are going to be busy for the next few weeks.

Anyways to make a long story short, spoke with her and her deadline got pushed up even further. I asked her if we were still on for Sunday, she said she she still is but we wouldn't be able to go out for very long a few hours but she feels bad becuase she knows we live about 20 minutes apart. She said something of the nature that she is interested in going out but just busy I more or less said that I don't mind making the trip becuase I will probably meet up with my boys who live in the area, later on for the Sunday night game. I did make it very clear however that I am in no rush what so ever, and if she needs to do her work, I can keep myself busy, but she then sort of said no she would really like to go out.

Now I really don't know if I went about things the right way, I really wanted to use this date to get the first kiss out of the way and probably much more in a enviorment where physical contact can be natural, you know something outdoorish which we innitially planning on doing. Now it seems I am kinda getting backed into a dinner or a lounge thing. Do I cancel the date, do the dinner or lounge and just get the first kiss over with and then wait until we are both free in about two weeks to take it further.....

I feel like a newbie all over again becuase this is the first chick in a long time that I actually seem to like..... any advice would be appreciated.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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zen511

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hmm am I just being overly anal hence no responses?
 
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Stuntmann

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Why does it have to be one date at a time? I mean, first kiss, then what? Can you f close the first time?


I'm pretty sure you can call her up, tell her you're coming over, pick her up on your car, sit her in, do C&F thing about no touching, put her hand over the shifter and kino her as you drive around. Playing a game or something. Move in for a kiss. Go for one over the top thing, you're allowed one per date. Like for f close, maybe she wants that.
 
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zen511

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Thats exactly what I meant by my innitial post, I probably was not very clear since I wrote it last night in a zombiesque state. More or less should I hold off and cancel until i know I can take it alot further, since I will be pressed for time, or should I just try to take it as far as I can with what I have. If it wasn't for her parents visiting until mid-september (staying at her place), I would probably be able to say I could take it all, but I can wait another week or so for that. Thats the only thing I feel holding me back, bc I think with the lack of time driving back to my place for such a short time would be either creepy or make it seem I am looking for nothing but sex...
 
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yep

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Just do bridges. Hand holding, then hugging, then kissing, ect make it natural.

If you want a kiss on that date then get it, just use the simple kiss test routine to see if she's up for it.

Also reframe that limiting belief you have if its holding you back.

Dont cancel though, just because its a short date u can still build attraction for the next time around. Dont worry about taking it to a physical level just try and make her smile.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Charm

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since you are the prize after all, right? Start acting like the prize rather then being so concerned about working around her busy schedule.
 
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zen511

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You guys are right, I should not go into a date with a preconeived notion it might do more harm than good. I am just going to see how far I can get regardless of the time even if its outside my comfort zone.
 
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Obsidian

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Invest in an English tutor. That was hard as hell to read.

Just go to dinner with her and take her for a walk afterwords, maybe. Or go to a bar. It's easy to kino at bars.
 
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Stuntmann

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I don't know.


It's possible that she wants to put up a face for her parents, a nice face. Use you for that, move slow with you. You'll be setting the pace, after her parents gone, that pace will remain. Possibly making you uninteresting.


Right now it sounds like she's very interested in her parents, and is keeping you away from that life. Yet she don't want to loose you, almost telling you to wait up.


If that's the case, these little dates would be to please you and keep you in. IL down with each one.



IMO anyway. Of the things I'm not really sure about, this is one of them.
 
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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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