"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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How do I let a girl know I want to be friends with benefits

Brighty

Master Don Juan
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Basically this girl texted me and told me that she liked me and I told her that I found her attractive but I wasn't interested in anything serious. She said she wasn't either, so how can I let her know I want to be friends with benefits? Whats the best way of saying it, and can someone with experience with this give me advice if its worth pursuing or not.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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WC2

Master Don Juan
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What the hell is wrong with some of the guys on here?

Why are you even thinking about relationships, friends with benefits, or anything like that?!

You haven't touched this girl and you are already getting these images locked up into your mind?

Take my advice, and stop thinking so hard. Those who take all the time to think, never really act and see the pink.

Meet with this girl, see the pink, make sure it don't stank, and then come back and report.

You're not really going to know how this girl is until you start getting to know her, aka hooking up with her.

If she's a b!tch, toss her, if not keep her around. You don't have to tell her anything. You don't have to say, "hey let's be friends with benefits." Just do it. Bang other women, and bang her.

End of discussion.
 

snowdog

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Brighty said:
Basically this girl texted me and told me that she liked me and I told her that I found her attractive but I wasn't interested in anything serious. She said she wasn't either, so how can I let her know I want to be friends with benefits? Whats the best way of saying it, and can someone with experience with this give me advice if its worth pursuing or not.
Just go with it man. You don't have to tell her you don't want a relationship. That **** will figure itself out.
 

Effington

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I concur with WC2. Too much thought, at least hit it first.
 

JDA70

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You really don't need to say anything.
Just hook up with her once and play it from there.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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PlayToWin

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Well step number 1 is that you never actually say "friends with benefits" well at least not before you have already hooked up with her multiple times, and even then it would only be if she brought it up.

Learn that this is the real world and not everybody wants a relationship and even if they do, relationships just sort of build until one day you decide to be exclusive. By your response its like you want her to sign a contract on exactly how your relationship between the two of you will play out.

Never, and I mean never bring up any talks about what your current status or situation with a girl is. If you bring it up early she is going to label you as a friend, and she would be right since you haven't been sexual with her, and from that point on your labeled friend and friends don't hook up. If you bring up short or long term relationships your going to scare them off especially if you haven't hooked up with them.

This isn't high school, not everything has to have a status or a label, go out with her, make a move, escalate, and close the deal. Then just repeat over the next few weeks, and there you go friends with benefits. Don't lie to her, just don't bring up what your situation is or what you think of her. If she brings it up, try to avoid labeling the situation and if she pressures then just be honest with her then, but by that point it doesn't matter much.
 

abcd_z

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PlayToWin said:
Well step number 1 is that you never actually say "friends with benefits" well at least not before you have already hooked up with her multiple times, and even then it would only be if she brought it up.

Learn that this is the real world and not everybody wants a relationship and even if they do, relationships just sort of build until one day you decide to be exclusive. By your response its like you want her to sign a contract on exactly how your relationship between the two of you will play out.

Never, and I mean never bring up any talks about what your current status or situation with a girl is. If you bring it up early she is going to label you as a friend, and she would be right since you haven't been sexual with her, and from that point on your labeled friend and friends don't hook up. If you bring up short or long term relationships your going to scare them off especially if you haven't hooked up with them.

This isn't high school, not everything has to have a status or a label, go out with her, make a move, escalate, and close the deal. Then just repeat over the next few weeks, and there you go friends with benefits. Don't lie to her, just don't bring up what your situation is or what you think of her. If she brings it up, try to avoid labeling the situation and if she pressures then just be honest with her then, but by that point it doesn't matter much.
Quoted for Truth
 
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