Anima
Don Juan
How did you end up finding SS? What made you start the search, and how did you ultimately end up on the site?
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
How Did You Find SoSuave?
- Thread starter Anima
- Start date
"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
ImTheDoubleGreatest!
Master Don Juan
I didn't find SoSuave, SoSuave found me.
Serenity
Moderator
Was sick and tired of not having any success with girls. I had a strong growing desire to be with a girl, but was out of ideas of how to realize my desire. I realized I was doing something wrong as obviously I was not getting what I aimed for, I just didn't know what it was or how to figure it out.
I searched and read through various things I found online for about 2 weeks. Mostly just found cheap pick-up lines and advice that obviously came from guys with no idea of how it works. Eventually I came across a blog in my language that just hit the nail on the head. It put words to exactly how I felt about my situation, because of that I knew that they knew what they were talking about. They had been through the same and now they were successful. I spent some time reading that blog, found out they had a forum and made a user there.
From that forum someone linked to "Book of Pook", that too was great stuff that really made an impact on me. It linked to the PDF so I wasn't aware at first that it was a collection of forum posts. When I figured that out I found this forum, where Pook once was active.
I searched and read through various things I found online for about 2 weeks. Mostly just found cheap pick-up lines and advice that obviously came from guys with no idea of how it works. Eventually I came across a blog in my language that just hit the nail on the head. It put words to exactly how I felt about my situation, because of that I knew that they knew what they were talking about. They had been through the same and now they were successful. I spent some time reading that blog, found out they had a forum and made a user there.
From that forum someone linked to "Book of Pook", that too was great stuff that really made an impact on me. It linked to the PDF so I wasn't aware at first that it was a collection of forum posts. When I figured that out I found this forum, where Pook once was active.
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
BeTheChange
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Jun 28, 2015
- Messages
- 1,461
- Reaction score
- 1,138
In a flood of tears googling "How to get your ex girlfriend back" *derp*
Been here since 2010. Changed my life.
Been here since 2010. Changed my life.
Desdinova
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Nov 15, 2004
- Messages
- 11,680
- Reaction score
- 4,874
After my fiancee had left me, I googled something along the lines of "tips on dating women". I ended up on a site called getgirls.com which had a few really good tips (along with a few 5hitty ones). The phrase "don juan" was used in some of their tips. One day, I forgot the URL and googled "don juan tips", and ended up here.
That was 15 years ago. Since then, my life has changed for the better.
That was 15 years ago. Since then, my life has changed for the better.
CuddleJunkie
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Nov 9, 2015
- Messages
- 769
- Reaction score
- 565
- Age
- 33
You can add me to the list.
SmooveMooves
Master Don Juan
Me too
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
CMNILS87
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Jan 17, 2016
- Messages
- 902
- Reaction score
- 662
- Age
- 39
Continually finding women of low value. I had some success and thought it was my personality type of sarcasm. The straw that broke the camels back for me was going on a few dates with a gal and getting "Oneitis" and thinking silly thoughts about babies and stuff. Slept with her and the next morning she said she was going to "meet a friend" for lunch.
She let slip it was another dude. I was like wtf and said this can't be the culture these days and started looking for information on how women think and i found this stuff only about a year ago. Dating is more focused on screening and listening to women to catch their tells and bull**** now. Back then it was be myself, flirt, and hopefully they like me and want to hang.
She let slip it was another dude. I was like wtf and said this can't be the culture these days and started looking for information on how women think and i found this stuff only about a year ago. Dating is more focused on screening and listening to women to catch their tells and bull**** now. Back then it was be myself, flirt, and hopefully they like me and want to hang.
I could care less about women, I did not come here for them. I do not need help dealing with them and never had problems, if anything they need help dealing with me. Had it been just a PUA site I would not have bothered, but it is more than just that.
I came here to better understand motivations and human behaviors. I came and asked a few questions, and to gain understanding... I found the forum to provide some very useful things. I also found it to provide acceptance, a very rare thing... This forum was not just about picking up women but there were injections of philosophy, psychology, self-improvement, and other such inclusions which made it something unique and interesting. I am a person who seek understanding and who also seeks to continually improve myself. I also seek to guide others, I consider it a kind of duty to make that which is weak stronger.
I came here to better understand motivations and human behaviors. I came and asked a few questions, and to gain understanding... I found the forum to provide some very useful things. I also found it to provide acceptance, a very rare thing... This forum was not just about picking up women but there were injections of philosophy, psychology, self-improvement, and other such inclusions which made it something unique and interesting. I am a person who seek understanding and who also seeks to continually improve myself. I also seek to guide others, I consider it a kind of duty to make that which is weak stronger.
CuddleJunkie
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Nov 9, 2015
- Messages
- 769
- Reaction score
- 565
- Age
- 33
And this is why I stayed....not a forum about PUA, but about DonJuanism...which is something different....really unique in the manosphere.
Dhoulmagus
Banned
- Joined
- Sep 11, 2013
- Messages
- 1,695
- Reaction score
- 169
Had oneitis my senior year of high school, so I resorted to the internet. This site was more appealing because of the dj bible and stuff.
ImTheDoubleGreatest!
Master Don Juan
Yeah I was too lazy to type out this whole thing, but it pretty much sums me up too. I wanted to learn more about PEOPLE. And well, despite this site originally intending to be about getting women, it also helps with understanding real social dynamics sometimes (something that the RSD forums were originally meant for but isn't really about despite RSD standing for 'real social dynamics' lol).
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
MrWood
Master Don Juan
had a Oneitis... used NC, for myself.
why I stay...
learned alot about frame, mostly loosing it...
in between the lines there is solid PUA advice, but not PUA mentality
learn by other stories, advice, wins and failures
we are men, this is a mans place... be a man.
why I stay...
learned alot about frame, mostly loosing it...
in between the lines there is solid PUA advice, but not PUA mentality
learn by other stories, advice, wins and failures
we are men, this is a mans place... be a man.
RangerMIke
Master Don Juan
My nephew came to me for help with women and mentioned that a lot of my advice was like a website he had seen... told me about this place a couple of years ago. Came here to check it out and thought "good stuff" and stayed. It really is all you need to get your sh!t together.