"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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How can you tell if your getting oneitis or are just excited about seeing a new girl?

Kal0051

Master Don Juan
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Err, this sucks, started talking to this new girl and we'll be dating soon. Love talking to her, she's got the same perverted sense of humor as me so it's awesome to joke around with her. I've been acting sexual with her from the start, and it's gone over really well (we talk about having sex all the time). But the problem is that I've been thinking about her a lot. I don't know if I'm getting oneitis for this girl, or if I'm just excited. What do you think?
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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horaholic

Master Don Juan
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At least you recognize it. Just watch yourself!
 

KontrollerX

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The minute the thought enters your mind that says "I can't walk away from this chick even if she does something that to any other man would be a clear dealbreaker" is the minute you know you have oneitis.

Oneitis is either the mental obsession of unrequitted love or the inability to walk away from a bad relationship because you require the girl like a drug user requires a drug high.

Oneitis is to be dependent on another person for your happiness while to be a DJ is to be dependent only on yourself for your ultimate happiness which means you are happy and fulfilled whether you are alone or in a relationship.

To be able to both enjoy a girl's company tremendously yet be willing to walk away from her and any girl (no matter how hot she is) at any time should she become massively disrespectful is how you know you've matured and no longer suffer from the scourge of oneitis.

Oneitis generally cannot take root in a man that puts his happiness first before anything else.

When a relationship is no longer fun and becomes all work the intelligent DJ leaves the relationship while the AFC stays in the undesireable situation fearful of losing his one, fearful more of being alone than being unhappy.
 

Kal0051

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well, I don't think I have oneitis but I feel unsure about whether or not it will happen. I guess I just don't want any AFC behavior to screw things up with this girl, it's been awhile since I've met a girl I clicked with this well.
 

Maxtro

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Ah unrequited love how I hate it so. It's been a month of no contact and I still have it for that bitch

I believe you have oneitis when she's the first thing that pops into your mind as soon as you aren't focused on anything.

KontrollerX gives a good description of how it occurs. It is still very difficult to prevent if the man isn't completely strong. It also becomes harder to avoid the more time you spend with somebody.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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