How attraction really works

[151674]

Ok and what I’m suggesting is that you didn’t ‘bake’ her enough. You walked away and didn’t get a date.
You may be a better man than whoever she ends up with. But you’re running Windows1999 software in 2021. People move way slower now. Especially after covid and 2 years of lockdowns and uncertainty. Tinder has desensitised many men to how real world attraction works.

She had a positive response initially because she gave you a number and replied to your text.
I’m giving you a potential solution.

You should have ‘baked’.
Proposed a date a few weeks later. Tell her you got something interesting going on and dissappear. Maybe send a picture of you doing said interesting thing a week or two later to ‘test the water’. If you get a positive response; bake some more and disappear for another week. In the meantime; you got other girls you are also baking.

Then pull the trigger and schedule a date which doesn’t seem like a date. More like she got lucky because you’re finally available to meet.
You came across as too try hard by giving her an ultimatum. It had the exact opposite effect of what you wanted. You wanted to seem like a prize; instead you just communicated that you want something from her. You need to seem more agenda-less. Communicate you are a prize non overtly by being slow and cutting the first date short. Never communicate you are a prize by giving ultimatums. Never communicate your alpha-ness overtly.

Yea I joined the forum a few days ago; so what? You realise there’s a world out there with billions of people who are living life, gaining wisdom and sexual experience without being a member here?

You guys are here worried about a girl FORGETTING you if you wait too long.
How is that believing yourself to be the prize? LOL.
Sounds like you’re disposable in the interaction and move quick out of scarcity. She’s the prize and can replace you in a week, eh? This feeling will come across in your subcommunications. Clearly you need to re-read the fundamentals.
The prize makes her wait because he’s unbothered.

Dude you really need to get off that red pill nonsense. See thats exactly why a woman can play mind games with guys like you cause you play mind games with them. I mean you telling me initially you will approach a woman of interest and tell her you got something interesting going on and disappear. Then 1 or 2 weeks later send a pic of you doing something interesting to test the waters. Dude you will lose every time doing that silly ass ****. You can never bake a woman enough if a woman is not attracted to you initially.

 

[Grounded eagle]

I’ve been dating for years and heavy unavailability is what works with the model level girls.
She’s attracted to guys that act more like Christiano Ronaldo and less like Seducer1979 from SoSuave.com

Cristiano Ronaldo also happens to be extremely handsome,quite possibly the best ever at what he does,one of the most famous people on the planet and is consistently one of the highest earning athletes with a history of dating super models and socialites.

He is a man who has completely fulfilled his potential.A 10 in every sense.

How many guys do you think are like that? You make some good points but you’re guilty of some binary thinking as well.Those super models are getting propositioned by guys from all over the social spectrum every 5 minutes.

 

[Willie Naylor]

No sense in debating this. This subject matter has already been thoroughly debated here. Millions of times over, I'm sure.

 

[Plinco]

{ Stream of consciousness }

A lot of you are misguided.

Attraction is about one thing - social dominance.
Whoever chases is submissive. Whoever is being chased is dominant. It’s the simple.

Men have been brainwashed. This is why men struggle. We are told to chase girls. To approach them. We are brainwashed with layers and layers of concepts such as romance, one night stands, marriage, first date, second date, third date etc: none of these exist in the state of nature. They complicate our psychology and cloud our vision.
If men went to night clubs and didn’t approach. Imagine they would just sit at tables and refuse to dance. The tables would be more exclusive than the ones that girls were sitting at, because men in general have more money. The men would be talking amongst each other, paying the women no mind - men have a greater capacity for self amusement. The women on the other hand would be bored. They would get needy and approach the male tables. The men would have the power.
Instead men have been brainwashed. We believe we must approach women. We feel women wouldn’t approach us AND we must expend energy towards a weird mating ritual - We must go on the dancefloor and stand around for hours. We dance (which is feminine/submissive behaviour -
Women dance to get the approval of men…not vice verca). Then we get shut down because we have lost our power. We never stop to think and question the fabric. All we had to do was collectively change our mentality.

In the state of nature. There was no forums. There were no dating coaches. No pickup lines. No careers. No titles. No salaries. No celebrities. No black pill. No red pill. No social media.

There were men and women. Some of those men would be better at surviving than others. Women would notice those men. Those men would dominate socially - they would walk around with dominant/haughty body language. They would move slow. They would appear stoic/aloof. Their voices would be deep. They would command attention and respect with better/powerful clothing. They would be quiet (news flash - talking is weak as it reveals your thoughts and emotions).

The women would be drawn to these men. The women would open the men first. IN COURTING - Whoever starts the conversation first is submissive. It will always be lodged in her memory that SHE APPROACHED HIM FIRST. This is how attraction is built. He would say less than her, much less. He would psychologically dominate the interaction by not caring.

Little details like jawlines, hairlines, race etc meant nothing in the state of nature. There was just dominant guys and weak guys. Physically and psychologically. Physically weaker guys were still bigger than most girls, so being dominant really came down to micro communications. More importantly; men could dominate by displaying their resources and by having great presence, or being highly respected etc

Essentially it is subtle micro communications which build attraction. Nuanced in the relationship between you and her. They come second hand when you are being chased. When a girl enthusiastically opens you, you feel in control, and therefore say and do less. When you end the conversation first. When you walk into the room without noticing her. when you wear a new expensive jacket. When you easily befriend the most powerful person in the venue. When you turn up late whilst she’s early. You replicate the natural dynamic.

You must ‘bake’ the girls you talk to. In other words, give it time: the hotter she is; the more she needs to wait on you. You dominate her psychologically by making her wait 1 month before you arrange a date. If she’s hot, make her wait 3 months, if she’s very hot make her wait 4 months. The hotter she is; the more ’baking’ you must employ: You mention the date early on but never text her to set a date: Then randomly hit her up months later.

This establishes the psychological frame and breaks the social conditioning and brainwashing. This is why having HER MEET YOU close to yours rather than meeting halfway etc all builds attraction. It’s not about how dominant you are in society, but how powerful you are in relation to HER. Who opened who first? Who messages who first? Who looked away first?

Whoever cares least has the power: this must permeate all aspects of your being. Another example men that get the hottest girls don’t post much on social media: the girl has 100 pictures but the dude has 3. He is dominant in this situation because he does less than her but still has her interest.

Seduction is a power struggle between the two genders. Where do you stand IN RELATION TO HER. Not where you stand in relation to society. Do you laugh at her jokes? If the answer is no; you are (to her) more powerful than a CEO/celebrity that does. He is supplicating to her but you are not.

Repeat - Seduction is a power struggle. We have been brainwashed to think that couples in love have ‘overcome’ this struggle. So we unnaturally override our instincts to dominate the interaction.

A lot of this has to do with how well you communicate. The problems that a lot of people have on here are several layers deep, including learned helplessness. I would say that it needs to start with a healthy psychology, which would go a long way in one's ability to communicate value and to actually produce value to begin with. On top of that, people lack experience, so they are cognitive about the power struggle, but don't understand just how deep that power struggle is, hence some of the members give likes to the comments made by female posters.