"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

How and what should i reply to this message

oneboy21

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 28, 2006
Messages
357
Reaction score
5
Location
Columbus, OH
I Kept my profession as IT in POF, since i work in IT
some girl sent me a message out of the blue, couple of days ago i remembered i saw her profile on POF, may be she looked into who viewed me

Here is the message: "what type of IT? I work for an.IT consulting company that works for the federal government and we are always looking for good talent. "
What should i reply guys.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

kenpiffyjr

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 3, 2011
Messages
265
Reaction score
146
First things first. There is a 95% chance she's into you. If you were some fat slob on there with acne with your profession saying IT, there's 1% chance she would message him. She's using her job as a tool to message you so she doesn't look needy. So get your swag right with that. She wants you.

Next...if you reply, like anything online dating...she knows you're interested. So you do not have to compliment with a message back. You don't have to give her value. You gave her value by just replying.

So be honest. Treat the chick like a regular person you're answering. Keep it to the point and tell her what she asks. When she replies back, then that's when you can do a small flirt.

The plan is to keep her value as low as it was when she messaged you. goodluck.
 

Chickfight

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Oct 29, 2010
Messages
477
Reaction score
30
"That's great, but what I'm really more interested in is if your pvssy is looking for looking for good talent ;)"

Haha I dunno man, it sounds like she's coming on to you in her own geeky way? Just tell her what kind of IT you work in and say you should meet up and talk about it over drinks. If you ask girl to do anything with you "over drinks", she automatically will know what's up.
 

GhostWriter

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 20, 2010
Messages
121
Reaction score
4
I'd respond with...

"Oh yea? What type of good talent are you looking for? I have many ;)."

Then I'd start steering the conversation into something sexual.
 

Iceberg

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 19, 2002
Messages
3,110
Reaction score
136
Age
45
Location
Manhattan, NY
GhostWriter said:
I'd respond with...

"Oh yea? What type of good talent are you looking for? I have many ;)."

Then I'd start steering the conversation into something sexual.
Maybe it's just my style, but I'd advise AGAINST that. With internet, you're trying to get the girl to MEET you. Once she's met you, you can proceed to trying to get the sex.

If it's at a bar or a club, where you've already established that you're a cool, socially-adapted guy, you can make the sexual innuendo jokes. These dating sites are full of weird, weird people. You gotta establish that you're not one of them.

Anyway, I don't think this girl is seriously trying to hire someone through POF. It was just her opening like....a terrible one....but it's her attempt at reaching out (I guess even the girls in IT are bad at pick-ups).

Just make some joke about "I'm not sure you can afford me." or "You're ready to hire me already? Guess I write a hell of a profile."
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

oneboy21

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 28, 2006
Messages
357
Reaction score
5
Location
Columbus, OH
my reply to her message.
ME: You're ready to hire me already? Guess I wrote a hell of a profile. I work with CTI.
Do you know what CTI is?.
Her: what's CTI? we are always looking software engineers.

any suggestion guys
 

Ease

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 23, 2009
Messages
1,320
Reaction score
51
'So do your company always look for employees on internet dating sites? I'm always looking for a girl with [whatever trait you think of, one that she mentions on her profile]. Can you help me out?
 

Iceberg

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 19, 2002
Messages
3,110
Reaction score
136
Age
45
Location
Manhattan, NY
oneboy21 said:
my reply to her message.
ME: You're ready to hire me already? Guess I wrote a hell of a profile. I work with CTI.
Do you know what CTI is?.
Her: what's CTI? we are always looking software engineers.

any suggestion guys
Well, ideally you would have followed up your "Ready to hire me already" joke with a question about her social life. You want to steer this conversation away from work a quickly as possible. This girl is terrible at flirting, by the way. Simply awful. So you're gonna have to lead.

"CTI is blah blah blah. When we're not working crazy late, we're out at happy hour, or basketball, or more happy hours. It's a fun group. We were just at (some bar) the other day? You ever been there? What do you do for fun around these parts?"

Then, if she's normal, she responds with what she does for fun.

THEN you respond with "Blah blah. That sounds awesome. We should meet up for happy hour. I think you'd love (some bar). What's your number?"

I mean, add some of your personality to these responses. Don't just do the two sentence response "Do you know what CTI is?" That's just gonna lead to a boring response from the chick (which is what you ended up with).

You're trying to convey yourself as a fun social person. If you have a dog, end your message with "My dog's begging for attention. Gotta go for a walk." Anything that builds an image in her head of you being someone fun to chill with.
 

cordoncordon

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 2, 2006
Messages
2,889
Reaction score
109
Iceberg said:
Well, ideally you would have followed up your "Ready to hire me already" joke with a question about her social life. You want to steer this conversation away from work a quickly as possible. This girl is terrible at flirting, by the way. Simply awful. So you're gonna have to lead.

"CTI is blah blah blah. When we're not working crazy late, we're out at happy hour, or basketball, or more happy hours. It's a fun group. We were just at (some bar) the other day? You ever been there? What do you do for fun around these parts?"

Then, if she's normal, she responds with what she does for fun.

THEN you respond with "Blah blah. That sounds awesome. We should meet up for happy hour. I think you'd love (some bar). What's your number?"

I mean, add some of your personality to these responses. Don't just do the two sentence response "Do you know what CTI is?" That's just gonna lead to a boring response from the chick (which is what you ended up with).

You're trying to convey yourself as a fun social person. If you have a dog, end your message with "My dog's begging for attention. Gotta go for a walk." Anything that builds an image in her head of you being someone fun to chill with.
Spot on advice....Ice.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

oneboy21

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 28, 2006
Messages
357
Reaction score
5
Location
Columbus, OH
After taking suggestion from ICRburg i sent here this message

ME: CTI is blah blah blah... computer telephony. When we're not working crazy late, we're out at happy hour, or basketball, or more happy hours. It's a fun group. We were just at BWW the other day? You ever been there? What do you do for fun around these parts?

she responds after two days, (BWW is buffalo wild wings)
Her: What is BWW

Now tell me Guys whats next for me, I need to pull this girl, she is really cute
 

oneboy21

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 28, 2006
Messages
357
Reaction score
5
Location
Columbus, OH
Your answer makes sense to me
Should i just leave her or learn any game in gaming this chick
I can walk away and ignore this chick no problem
 

PrettyBoyAJ

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 19, 2010
Messages
2,584
Reaction score
339
Age
36
Location
Atlanta
Buffalo Wild Wings. You've never been there before? Maybe I should take you sometime soon. You will enjoy it
. . .
 

kenpiffyjr

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 3, 2011
Messages
265
Reaction score
146
erased my message telling you to walk away. That would be premature.... You can still polish this out. but beware, this chick is either fighting to have higher value than you by acting like you don't make sense/not answering your questions/writing less or is just really not that into you. Next time, don't give this chick any scapegoat. Type everything out.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

Read more...

oneboy21

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 28, 2006
Messages
357
Reaction score
5
Location
Columbus, OH
Hi Picked this one, what you guys think

Buffalo Wild Wings. You've never been there before? Maybe I should take you sometime soon. You will enjoy it, tell me Are you the sort of person I should get to know better?" If you think Yes tell me Why?
 

PrettyBoyAJ

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 19, 2010
Messages
2,584
Reaction score
339
Age
36
Location
Atlanta
This isn't an interview. Don't ask her the last part.
 

oneboy21

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 28, 2006
Messages
357
Reaction score
5
Location
Columbus, OH
Update
ME: Buffalo wild wings. You've never been there before? May be i should take you some time soon. You will enjoy it. What do you like to do for fun?, do you
have lots of guys chasing you?

HER: lol i don't think i've known anyone who abbreviates that place. ihave their food, yes, i get bunch of ugly tards messaging me.

Now should i reply her or leave her... Final decision
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Top