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How accurate is this statement?

Men that actually give Women Good Sex are Rare

  • True

  • False


Results are only viewable after voting.

Tilex

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How accurate is this statement?
"men that actually give women good sex are rare."
I don't see this statement very often online, especially on reddit where it's practically unheard of.
But every 20 or so threads I read on SoSuave, I notice a few people mention this.

I'm wondering if this is a general concensus or a distorted view of a few individuals?
If this statement is true, then why isn't it talked about often?

[Poll Added]
 

Black Widow Void

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Unless they've done a survey, I'm not sure that straight men are qualified to offer an answer.

A woman can receive bad sex for (at least) a couple of reasons.
1. If the guy isn't into her (and doesn't want her following him around afterward) he's going to be in it for personal gratification only (likely leaving her unfulfilled) .
or
2. The guy has no clue what he's doing.

Like I'm sure most men here, I've heard the "you're the best" (or something similar) line before. I never take it seriously though because it's probably said to any male that she finds of actual interest.
 

Hal9000

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Women would certainly claim that its true. Its amazing how many women complain about most men not even being able to be an adequate kisser, much less any of the rest of it.
 

sangheilios

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I have a friend that told me about a girl he was dating in the spring that was having some issues with their sex life. He told me he wasn't really that into her and that he'd have a hard time ejaculating from intercourse. She picked up on it and it made her feel very insecure because she felt as if she wasn't attractive.

I think good sex is when both parties are genuinely very into each other on a physical level, what a woman would term as "chemistry". If you get one party that isn't really that into it for sure it will be different.

I think many women are not that attracted to most men that they have access to and because of this they might consider the sex "bad".
 

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zekko

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Some guys lack the skill to please a woman. Other guys simply don't care.
 

RickTheToad

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How accurate is this statement?


I don't see this statement very often online, especially on reddit where it's practically unheard of.
But every 20 or so threads I read on SoSuave, I notice a few people mention this.

I'm wondering if this is a general concensus or a distorted view of a few individuals?
If this statement is true, then why isn't it talked about often?

[Poll Added]
You need to get the b itch to shake, rattle and roll her eyes behind her eyelids. A plus if you can get her to squirt all over the place.

@BeExcellent
 

Who Dares Win

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-Most men dont get laid often and when they do, dont really know what to do.

-Most men dont get laid easier and when they do after a lot of work they no longer give a fvck about her pleasure.

-Few men get laid often and easy and for such reason they have no intention to invest much in one of the many.

-Few men men get laid enough and with a woman they appreciate with whom are at ease thus make an effort to make her happy.

*personally the more a woman stresses me with drama and bvllsh1t, the less I care about her pleasure...she sucks my energy before, I wont have any left during and definitely none after.

I'm the kind of guy that falls asleep after coming, and turns his back when sleeping.
 

In2theGame

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I have a friend that told me about a girl he was dating in the spring that was having some issues with their sex life. He told me he wasn't really that into her and that he'd have a hard time ejaculating from intercourse. She picked up on it and it made her feel very insecure because she felt as if she wasn't attractive.

I think good sex is when both parties are genuinely very into each other on a physical level, what a woman would term as "chemistry". If you get one party that isn't really that into it for sure it will be different.

I think many women are not that attracted to most men that they have access to and because of this they might consider the sex "bad".
I was about to post something very similar to this. If a girl is already very into a guy, her juices are already flowing and when they have sex, she's already so turned on and will chalk it up to good satisfactory sex. Unless the dude is packin a 2 incher and/or has no stamina,
 

Lookatu

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This is relative for each couple and will depend on their personal sexual experiences to reference from and their sexual chemistry with each other.
I've known women that's only had vanilla sex for example until they met me then they thought I was the best. But other women that had been bruised, choked, rim jobbed, may think of me as tame. Get my drift?

One universal way IMO though if you're a good lover to HER and what she has to go by reference within her limited experience is if she ever calls you by your first name during sex. I find anytime a gal calls you by your first name during sex is when you're doing something right.
 

lostintime

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I personally don't think it has much to do with your skill level. It's her impression of you that makes the sex good.
 

BeExcellent

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Advice from the old lady:

My reply will be nuanced. I think this is a very important topic and I cannot speak for all women but I know my experience and I know other women who have shared their experience with me over the years, married as well as single and I think there are a number of things to be mindful of...

Being a good lover is an acquired skill. It is learned. Women’s anatomy is rather different than a man’s anatomy (obvious enough) and so lovers must learn generally what is pleasant for the opposite sex and then what specifically pleases a particular partner.

Notice where the above paragraph puts emphasis...on the partner, not on self.

A great lover seeks to please their partner and learn the partners preferences while also knowing what turns them on and is willing to communicate with and listen/pay attention to what their lover needs/wants/desires while also meeting their own needs. A great lover is personal and tuned in to the partner while also pleasing oneself.

Self gratification doesn’t make a good or great lover. There are men who have had lots and lots of sex who are not great at sex. The sexual act itself isn’t the end all be all. If a man simply goes into a trance like state and pounds away during penetration he’s actually disconnected from his partner no matter how physically satisfying his anatomy might be. Sexual trance and being in one’s mind has a place in sexual repotoire but if that’s where a man always goes? It’s going to be a disconnected experience for his partner UNLESS she is doing the same thing. This is where two people use one another for essentially mutual masterbation with a partner. She knows her spots, she uses him to get off, he uses her to get off. It may be hot...but it’s shallow and doesn’t build connection as lovers. These are your hot & heavy sexual relationships that ignite fast & burn out fast. There isn’t any human connection built.

My recent exBF struggled to connect. He has a long history of flame up & flame out relationships. He’s a GREAT seducer. Great at touching, kissing and knowing how to bed women. But he is a so-so lover in that he goes more to self gratification and has a hard time connecting. Now. Once he’s connected that changes. But it took time for him to let his guard down emotionally. And then comes all his internal freak outs that his guard is down...that’s another topic altogether.

There are several components to this. First is learning what and how to do things. Be open and receptive to instructions guys. Learn to kiss. Learn a woman’s body. Learn to slow down & be sensual. Years ago I was fortunate in that my first lover taught me what my body could do. Keep in mind, especially that with inexperienced women, she may not really know what to do herself. After that LTR I became involved with someone else (who remains a friend almost 30 years later) and he really wasn’t a great kisser and didn’t really know how to touch and explore a woman. So having learned from that first LTR, I taught him how to please me. It was awkward to have that communication but it paid off. Even today he credits me with teaching him how to touch a woman. It’s kind of a sweet acknowledgement. So be open to learning & exploring. That means listening to your partner.

There are people (this applies equally to men & women) who can physically enjoy one another sans emotional connection or involvement. Without bonding. I would say these are people who actually fear or experience difficulty bonding in part due to promiscuous behavioral patterns. These are your high notch count people.

Then there are people who seek emotional connection and who seek to bond. I’m in this camp. For me to really open up sexually I’ve got to have emotional connection and investment with and from my partner. This takes time to occur.

So it’s in my view a combination of skill (knowing what/how to do), and what each partner is seeking from the interaction.

As you might imagine getting a self gratification person together with a person desirous of emotional bonding can be a challenging mismatch to a degree.

Actual anatomy is nice if a man has it, but skill is more important in my view.

Learn the skills. Look up good kisser for example on the forum. I know in years past I’ve contributed content explaining good and not so good kissing technique for example...

Maybe Ill try and find that thread. It’s important to learn.

Cheers
 

BeExcellent

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I think like the guys said it's more about how she perceives you and how into you she is.
It’s more than that. A bad kisser is a turn off. A selfish lover or bad lover is also a turn off. These things can and often do kill attraction for a woman.
 

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mrgoodstuff

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It’s more than that. A bad kisser is a turn off. A selfish lover or bad lover is also a turn off. These things can and often do kill attraction for a woman.
Agree. But how much shes into you amplifies whatever you do. That good kisser guy that she doesn't want kissing her will be gross. Whereas the guys Shes into almost anything he does will excite her. And yes if they are too INTO THEMSELVES it sucks! For a man to. If they are too into themselves it feels like your disrespectful of yourself by engaging them physically.
 

Bwedr

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Advice from the old lady:

My reply will be nuanced. I think this is a very important topic and I cannot speak for all women but I know my experience and I know other women who have shared their experience with me over the years, married as well as single and I think there are a number of things to be mindful of...

Being a good lover is an acquired skill. It is learned. Women’s anatomy is rather different than a man’s anatomy (obvious enough) and so lovers must learn generally what is pleasant for the opposite sex and then what specifically pleases a particular partner.

Notice where the above paragraph puts emphasis...on the partner, not on self.

A great lover seeks to please their partner and learn the partners preferences while also knowing what turns them on and is willing to communicate with and listen/pay attention to what their lover needs/wants/desires while also meeting their own needs. A great lover is personal and tuned in to the partner while also pleasing oneself.

Self gratification doesn’t make a good or great lover. There are men who have had lots and lots of sex who are not great at sex. The sexual act itself isn’t the end all be all. If a man simply goes into a trance like state and pounds away during penetration he’s actually disconnected from his partner no matter how physically satisfying his anatomy might be. Sexual trance and being in one’s mind has a place in sexual repotoire but if that’s where a man always goes? It’s going to be a disconnected experience for his partner UNLESS she is doing the same thing. This is where two people use one another for essentially mutual masterbation with a partner. She knows her spots, she uses him to get off, he uses her to get off. It may be hot...but it’s shallow and doesn’t build connection as lovers. These are your hot & heavy sexual relationships that ignite fast & burn out fast. There isn’t any human connection built.

My recent exBF struggled to connect. He has a long history of flame up & flame out relationships. He’s a GREAT seducer. Great at touching, kissing and knowing how to bed women. But he is a so-so lover in that he goes more to self gratification and has a hard time connecting. Now. Once he’s connected that changes. But it took time for him to let his guard down emotionally. And then comes all his internal freak outs that his guard is down...that’s another topic altogether.

There are several components to this. First is learning what and how to do things. Be open and receptive to instructions guys. Learn to kiss. Learn a woman’s body. Learn to slow down & be sensual. Years ago I was fortunate in that my first lover taught me what my body could do. Keep in mind, especially that with inexperienced women, she may not really know what to do herself. After that LTR I became involved with someone else (who remains a friend almost 30 years later) and he really wasn’t a great kisser and didn’t really know how to touch and explore a woman. So having learned from that first LTR, I taught him how to please me. It was awkward to have that communication but it paid off. Even today he credits me with teaching him how to touch a woman. It’s kind of a sweet acknowledgement. So be open to learning & exploring. That means listening to your partner.

There are people (this applies equally to men & women) who can physically enjoy one another sans emotional connection or involvement. Without bonding. I would say these are people who actually fear or experience difficulty bonding in part due to promiscuous behavioral patterns. These are your high notch count people.

Then there are people who seek emotional connection and who seek to bond. I’m in this camp. For me to really open up sexually I’ve got to have emotional connection and investment with and from my partner. This takes time to occur.

So it’s in my view a combination of skill (knowing what/how to do), and what each partner is seeking from the interaction.

As you might imagine getting a self gratification person together with a person desirous of emotional bonding can be a challenging mismatch to a degree.

Actual anatomy is nice if a man has it, but skill is more important in my view.

Learn the skills. Look up good kisser for example on the forum. I know in years past I’ve contributed content explaining good and not so good kissing technique for example...

Maybe Ill try and find that thread. It’s important to learn.

Cheers
I thot u wud nightlight thoz things unlike leaving it open like that..are u shy..kkkk @kiddn
 

BeExcellent

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Agree. But how much shes into you amplifies whatever you do. That good kisser guy that she doesn't want kissing her will be gross. Whereas the guys Shes into almost anything he does will excite her. And yes if they are too INTO THEMSELVES it sucks! For a man to. If they are too into themselves it feels like your disrespectful of yourself by engaging them physically.
Agree up to a point. That point depends on the individual dynamics between two people. That why it’s important to learn generally what is pleasing to the opposite sex and also what specifically pleases the partner.

Eg: Men like BJs.
BF likes to be touched & stroked a certain way during BJs.

There’s a difference.
 
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