"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Hottie's cell phone is broken. E-mail or facebook?

Antedeus

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My dear homeez...

Hopefully the title explains it all, but if not, here's a little background: basically, my friend Asen (a Bulgarian who has a certain amount of game and who knows how to party) and I went out to a bar in Hollywood that features arts and crafts. We accompanied a couple girls that we're friends with (one of whom is HAWT, but she's had the same blasted boyfriend since freshman year -_-), met up with some of the girls' other friends there, and had a good time. I hit it off pretty nicely with this one girl who's a stoner chick (I don't smoke, but it's not an issue for me if she does), who's, I'd say, a 7.5 or an 8 looks-wise (NICE bewbs). I really liked her attitude, though; she seemed like a lot more of a free-spirit than the other vindictive militant feminist harpies with emo boyfriends that seem to dominate my school. I got her number, and we took her back to school with us, but she was nodding off to sleep, and I could tell that my female friends kinda found her annoying, so I decided to call it an evening and ask her out later.

Anywho, point is, I followed good ol' DJ protocol, waited a few days, and then just called her about a half-hour ago. I got her answering machine: her phone's broken, but it'll be ready on Wednesday or Thursday. I don't want to wait that long, though. Should I e-mail her? Or perhaps leave her a message over facebook.com? I already have her listed as a friend on that...

Thoughts?
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Pimp-sicle

Master Don Juan
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How do you know her phone's broken?? Did she tell you that when you # closed her or are you just assuming that. In my opinion if she had high interest she would have flat out told you her phone is in the ****ter at the moment and for you to contact her through e-mail or facebook. In any case wait it out a few days, if you don't hear from her then try the other methods of contact. If you still get no response, don't waste your time.




PIMP
 

Antedeus

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Her phone broke sometime in the days between when I number-closed her and when I called her. She didn't dupe me, don't worry.
 

Matheau

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If at possible, if you can run into her without going out of your way, in person, I usually find that is a lot better.

If it absolutely has to be between those two, go with e-mail.
 

Desdinova

Master Don Juan
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Unless you come into contact with her again before Wed or Thurs, just wait until her phone is fixed. It's only one woman, nothing to put a huge amount of energy toward. Until then, sarge other women.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Antedeus

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Sound advice from both of you, it sounds like, although I doubt I'll see her before those days. She's a sociology major, I'm a poly sci major, and "never the twain shall meet," as they say.:p

Unless you guys recommend me going to the sociology building to "conveniently bump into her," if you will, between now and then? Because that can be arranged; this is a small school.
 
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