"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Horniest pig I've ever seen
- Thread starter MatureDJ
- Start date
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
RickTheToad
Moderator
A pig and a cow?
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
lgbs2004
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Nov 23, 2006
- Messages
- 382
- Reaction score
- 342
She must love bacon
Who Dares Win
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Jan 16, 2012
- Messages
- 7,426
- Reaction score
- 5,803
Yeah a pig and a fat cow where the pig thinks he got a big deal while the cow doesnt even feel him.
Whatever comes out of that will find a seat in the european parliament in 2024 very likely.
Black Widow Void
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Feb 24, 2010
- Messages
- 2,152
- Reaction score
- 3,796
But never try to make it with a pig -- They'll squeal on you.
Mike32ct
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Oct 22, 2007
- Messages
- 8,411
- Reaction score
- 5,174
Piggy has no beef with interspecies dating. He porks cows all the time.
BackInTheGame78
Moderator
- Joined
- Sep 10, 2014
- Messages
- 16,983
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"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Çharismo
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Aug 2, 2014
- Messages
- 249
- Reaction score
- 187
Na man the cow is my girl!!! I gonna marry her and make babies!!!!