Hit up this girl after 3 months of NC?

[Afchump1989]

Long story but ill go into detail..i liked this girl..thought she liked me, she was stubborn denied it and I called her out on it. It was bad..telling her thanks for wasting my time and playing games with me. She got mad, seen at school a month later and she gave me the silent treatment. Anyways, now I still have feelings for her but not like before but I still feel bad because of what I said. Im a nice person but I gained confidence recently, I just felt she treated me bad so she deserved it. So im thinking of sending her a text not saying sorry to her directly, but for the way I acted. I guess I need somewhat closure..i dont care if she doesnt respond, I just need to be at peace with myself.

 

[Harry Wilmington]

i liked this girl..thought she liked me, she was stubborn denied it and I called her out on it.

YOU NEVER DO THIS. First, a girl is not stubborn for not admitting she doesn't like you - 90% of the time, it just means she doesn't actually like you.

Just 'cause a girl is being nice to you doesn't mean she wants to be with you - most girls are nice in a friendly manner to EVERYBODY. And, on the off-chance that she DID like you, you trying to call her out on it made the whole thing rushed to where she wasn't comfortable with the pace at which you were making her admit her feelings. Either way, no bueno.

It was bad..telling her thanks for wasting my time and playing games with me. She got mad, seen at school a month later and she gave me the silent treatment.

YOU NEVER DO THIS. It makes you come across as a wining, impatient AFC who's mad for not getting his way.

Another thing: girls who like you will NOT play games. Specifically, they will not play the game most guys think girls are playing when they don't like them - the "oh, I like him, but I think I'll mess with his head first and make him think I don't like him at first so he'll chase me" game. This game does NOT exist.

Contrary to what most guys think, girls, while having more options than men, only like a certain amount of guys, and can be left waiting YEARS before they find the option they want to go out with. Therefore, when that option comes along, it's a waste of their time to play games for too long with a guy because he might decide to choose someone else.

That's why I always say: if they're "playing games" with you, they're NOT playing games - they just don't like you.

Anyways, now I still have feelings for her but not like before but I still feel bad because of what I said... im thinking of sending her a text not saying sorry to her directly, but for the way I acted. I guess I need somewhat closure..i dont care if she doesnt respond, I just need to be at peace with myself.

YOU NEVER DO THIS. She wasn't interested in the first place, and you saying what you said gave her the excuse to not have to talk to you. As sucky as what you said was, you did her a favor.

You trying to apologize now is both pointless AND selfish: pointless because it doesn't matter what you say to her, she's not interested in hearing it; and selfish because you're only trying to apologize to make yourself feel like the nice guy you think you are. I don't doubt you're a nice guy, but the fact that you're saying "I need closure" and "I need to be at peace with myself" means you're only doing it for you. It would have been better to have said "I'm apologizing in case I caused her any hurt" or "I just want to take away those things I said to her."

Plus - and here's the kicker - did it dawn on you that the phone works both ways? If she wanted to talk to you, she would have hit you up by now. I've had times where I said the absolute worse things I could think of to a chick... yet they would eventually hit me up, even if it was just to say "you were a d!ck to me, we need to talk." Still calling me out for being mean, yet still showing interest. Is she doing that to you? If not, there's a reason...

 

[Afchump1989]

Yeah you have a point, im not trying to get with her though. I made something out of nothing and she already knew I was a nice guy. Ive known her for about two years. She's my cousins friend. Im not trying to be selfish and get closure but there were times when we had arguments and she would say "stop saying sorry". I deal with anxiety so I feel like I cant move on until I do this.

 

[Afchump1989]

I was going to send her a text saying this : I know it's been a minute since I last spoke to you and things ended on a bad foot but all im going to say I was stubborn.I  made something out of nothing. I had anxiety issues when I was younger so it snuck up on me.Started over analyzing things and it drove me crazy literally lol.Lost feelings so Hope we can someday be friends again. Congrats on graduating and take care of yourself.


Im not a ****y person at all..im quiet and she knows it..i just felt she was kinda interested.but was scared to say it because shes friends with my cuz. She was outgoing and talkative but around me she was always quiet and I got to know her mostly by text.Anyways im over her, but I cant focus on school because I keep thinking about it

 

[Purefilth]

I was going to send her a text saying this : I know it's been a minute since I last spoke to you and things ended on a bad foot but all im going to say I was stubborn.I  made something out of nothing. I had anxiety issues when I was younger so it snuck up on me.Started over analyzing things and it drove me crazy literally lol.Hope we can someday be friends again. Congrats on graduating and take care of yourself.


Im not a ****y person at all..im quiet and she knows it..i just felt she was kinda interested.but was scared to say it because shes friends with my cuz. She was outgoing and talkative but around me she was always quiet and I got to know her mostly by text.

doesn't matter. pay attention to harry. If you send that, you'll come across as needing her to like you.
You don't need her. You've lived your life so far without her. You dont need her to like you. Leave it as it is, and grow as a man.

 

[Afchump1989]

You're right. Any tips on forgetting this though. Cant focus at all.

 

[Purefilth]

You're right. Any tips on forgetting this though. Cant focus at all.

hit the gym, get some hobbies. chat to girls - Read the DJ bible, Book of Pook, and start up DJ Bootcamp.(link at the bottom of the page)

Once you focus on other things (mainly yourself), and get a few girls around you, you'll realise how little the other one matters really,trust me, you'll just forget about her.

Welcome to the Red Pill, Stick around and read a bit

 

[Afchump1989]

Thanks man..she's 21 and is a very insecure person, always complained about her dates etc. Thanks for waking me up. Im not really a social person so I guess gym is step one.

 

[jonhaul]

Plus - and here's the kicker - did it dawn on you that the phone works both ways? If she wanted to talk to you, she would have hit you up by now. I've had times where I said the absolute worse things I could think of to a chick... yet they would eventually hit me up, even if it was just to say "you were a d!ck to me, we need to talk." Still calling me out for being mean, yet still showing interest. Is she doing that to you? If not, there's a reason...

I hate it when these women come back months and months later. Its very insulting especially if they dumped you. They can find attention else where I gave them their chance and they blew it... I dunno why they keep my number though. So dumb and stupid... They all can go pound sand!

 

[cfdagola]

Im not a ****y person at all..im quiet and she knows it..i just felt she was kinda interested.but was scared to say it because shes friends with my cuz. She was outgoing and talkative but around me she was always quiet and I got to know her mostly by text.Anyways im over her, but I cant focus on school because I keep thinking about it

and that wasn't some red flag to say ABORT MISSION.

but instead indicated that she liked you?

you have oneitis bad my friend. and over a girl who never showed any interest really.