"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Hit on Servers

LeonSK

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I go to this restaurant like everyday. Yesterday I spotted a hot server that I can't resist. The only thing I worry is if she refuses me, it would become awkward to go back to that restaurant. Any opinions?

Do you guys hit on servers? Any particular advice?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Demonpenz

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It's only awkward if you make it awkward. Be careful not to be that wussy who is only able to talk to hired guns.
 

DonJuanit0

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I just wanna ask something really obvious, cause I've done it before, and yes she rejected me in a way and I went back there several times having fun even with her (not as I wanted though).

Why would it really feel awkward going back there even if she rejected you?


I know you will feel like it, but ask yourself, why is it awkward? You just tried for something, you are better than most of men who do nothing.

I'd say go for it and even if it fails, you are the bigger man, trying and still doesn't get hurt if it fails!
 

Omerta

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She gets asked out all the time. You're going to need to DHV hard.. if it fails it will only be awkward if you attach your ego to it. There is much more into the situation than just a measure of how awesome you are.

It will only be awkward for you if you let it and be in-direct during your 'approach'.
 

VladPatton

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I think it's one of the hardest number grabs to do. Hot waitresses get hit on all day and they have a knee-jerk, canned reaction to it. Hey, try and see what happens. Prepare for it mentally, and next time you go in make like nothing happened.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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LeonSK

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Talked to her yesterday. Good conversation. However when I asked if she wants to hang out, she came very close to me and told me quietly she just got out of a serious relationship and was in some strange mode. So I gave her my number and told her to contact me when she's ready. Overall not awkward at all, haha~ I think I can go back to that restaurant and it will be cool. Thanks guys for encouraging me!

Haven't heard anything yet. Decide to forget about her for now and keep hitting more girls.
 

skinnyguy

Master Don Juan
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Umm she won't call you. 1) you're some guy at her restaurant and 2) she's hot and just got out of a relationship.

Waitresses are tough. Hitting on any girl while she is working is tough.
 
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