"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
High Value men of improvement: bars and coffee shops
- Thread starter Jaws
- Start date
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
Chev.Chelios
Master Don Juan
that's literally how naturals live, first hand observations, lawl.
taiyuu_otoko
Master Don Juan
Serenity
Moderator
You could also say its just cartoon character coping.
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
High value men of improvement have a vast range of places they go. They dont choose to spend their lives getting high in bars or hanging out in coffee shops as their "go to" to meet women.
Vast ranges of places>>>>bars and coffee shops.
EyeBRollin
Master Don Juan
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Serenity
Moderator
Not necessarily. My point was that where they go for dates is not what gives them value. The fact that a guy goes to a coffee shop or a bar does not necessarily make him low value. The fact that a guy takes a girl to some action date doesn't necessarily make him high value. It could very well be the opposite, the low value guy taking them on unique dates to try to impress (compensate for his lack of value).
I think coffee shops are great places for a date, they're practical in every way. If you don't like her you've wasted minimal amount of money and time, because such dates are short and cheap. It being short is also great if you like her, because there's time to go somewhere else afterwards. You are not locked to doing the coffee date and leave afterwards, you can combine it with other activities.
A date isn't about the location, it's about the interaction. That said, the worst place for a date is at a cinema, not much opportunity for interaction.
It looks like you're falling into the trap of trying to impress with unique date ideas. Although there's nothing wrong with doing original dates, there may be something wrong about the motivation to do it. You must ask yourself if you do it because you think she will like you more for it or if you do it because YOU want to do it. The former is not something that would motivate a high value guy.
/thread
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
You could see it that way yet if your go to spots to meet all of these X number of new women are just coffee shops and bars then all you are doing is living life around coffee shops and bars.
People who live in bars are run of the mill bar flies.
People who spend most of their time in coffee shops are booring.
People who go to different spots expand their horizons and arent tied to specific meeting places cuz "women".
But if sitting in bars and coffee shops every week is your thing because youre "high value". Have at it.
guru1000
Master Don Juan
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- Sep 20, 2007
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When I go to a oyster bar, they pay me to try their oysters--just because ...
That day that I flaked on you in the oyster bar in midtown NYC at 8 p.m., when you sat alone eating oysters on that lonely Saturday night awaiting Guru1000 who never showed ... if they made you pay the bill, they determined you were low value. Sorry pal.
Still not as low value as an ex-con that spends his life 24/7/365 on an anonymous forum posting fan fiction for men and threatening to sue random ip addresses because the Shekelsteins didnt give their unemployable son his weekly allowance.
EMBARRASSING.
guru1000
Master Don Juan
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- Sep 20, 2007
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- 5,299
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"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
guru1000
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Sep 20, 2007
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- 5,299
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- 4,338
Richard you couldnt attract hot girls in a wh0rehouse with fistfuls of $50s.
Nobody fvcks hot girls in their life according to you Richie. Your projecting and pathetic attempts at coping is knee slapping hilarious. Keep up the special olympics mental gymnastics lil guy. Lmao
Getting hearty lolz at Jewru1000 the oversized clown shoe isn't hatred son. Its simply using ponzi to serve as downtime entertainment.
@guru1000 represents the PUA snake oil conman selling a PUA playboy/rich man in the big city "brand" because he doesn't want to/can no longer get a real job. Basically the Wizard of Oz man behind a curtain putting forth a hologram image of himself and half you goofballs eat it up.
@RichardTheFrog represents the mentally damaged, hyper-sensitive MGTOW who is neck deep in coping mechanisms, begging for help on the daily while telling you hundreds of times that he can get laid "if he really wanted to" but "chooses not to" because it's "not worth it". Mental gymnastics to place himself in the position of decider.
All we're missing is the MRA "activist" calling himself a CEO or "founder" of an organization that get will get 0 laws changed, but you can donate to his Patreon anyway
RichardTheFrog
Banned
Except that I do.
Btw, not that I really care, but who the fvck are you?
Did you just join recently and now think that you know me? I'm just going to block you because you're an idiot.
Priceless.
Richie you ask questions and block the poster you're asking the questions to all in one reply, because YOU are an idiot.
Lay off huffing spray paint son.
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.