"Blank Mind on Dates? She's Dropping Hints You Keep Missing"

The plates get cleared and the silence lands like a brick. You can feel her waiting. Your brain offers up your commute, your job, the weather — topics that have ended more second dates than bad breath.

Here's what most guys never learn: women hand out free conversational material all night long. Tiny clues about what they actually want to discuss. Catch them and you never run out of things to say — because she's telling you what to say next.

Rule 4 of the "22 Rules" trains your ear to catch every single one.

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Hi to all and question

kickIT!

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Hi guys,
I'm reading this board quite a while and read all the standard stuff we have here, so please don't point me at that immediately :)

Ok, Question:

I'm at the house of a female friend of mine, together with another girl. We smoked some weed, and after that the other girl left.
So we are just the two of us, and she asks: "Ok, what to WE TWO do now...?" (not in english, but it was basically the same...). So after a while we decide to go to sleep, where a series of actions occurs that I just can't bring together.
First: She takes her pill in front of my eyes and says: "You never know what happens..."
I take this as a come-on, so when she is in the bathroom I takeover her bed and make some jokes about when she comes back. She says: "Ok, so I sleep on the floor, thats only fair for the host"

She then proceeds to get on the mattress on the floor and after a while tells me: "Ooooh, aaaaah, my back pains so much." "Of course I offer her a massage, which she refuses directly...."

Am I misinterpreting hard here or what do you think is up?

Oh, and she is more of a friend than a potential lover, but I think she would **** me...

Cheers
kickIT
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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LikRetsam

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Girls are wierd. Can you detail what happened at the end cause right now all I can tell you is ignore it.
 

splinterkb

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Girls are indeed wierd, and even more wierd when they're high. Don't take anything against you with a woman when they're high, because they're out of character.
 

runner10_13

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or you were both high and in reality none of that really happened. Could be...never know...
 

kickIT!

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UUhm, when THAT happened, we were already coming down, as it was 2 hours after we smoked one joint (although this was a nice one ;)). What happened after that was, that we both slept in seperate beds, I in hers and she in another one...
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Cloud-uk

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My first guess is you ahve experienced the phemonenon of "the anti-flirt".

Girls are not wierd. All their actions make logical sence, even if most of the time it's far too much effort to work them out.

However, girls flirt. A lot. It present society they do it to be polite, and hence what a girl says is usually meaningless courtesy verbal dribble. So thus derives "look at what they do, not what they say".

A girl can tell you to **** her and really dislike you on a very personal level. However, if a girl really wants your **** you pick it up from the body language- heavy kino, leaning in, you know- use your gut on this one, but blank out the crap that comes out of her mouth.

Now, what did she do? Took a contraceptive, refused a massage, and slept on the floor. But she did it while spouting this flirty "ooo look at me I've got boobs" crap that just confuses people and gets her nowhere. Personally, I understand why girls do the stuff they do, but I am still amazed at how mind-dentingly stupid they can be... flirting without the point of sex...that's like a porn movie with no money-shot. Goddamn:rolleyes: ...

Of course, she could be playing games, maybe she loves you but is to afraid to blah blah blah... Who gives a ****? Yeah, maybe she'd **** you, but you shouldn't waste any time or effort over her. Maybe she'll get her act together.

Remember, girl's aren't stupid, at least not more stupid than most people. They can even be concidered smart whe it comes to dating. They are also conditional:
Don't take anything against you with a woman when they're high, because they're out of character.
Splinterkb makes a good point. Girls are conditional, this is something you have to take into account. Never, ever take what they do or say personally and very rarely take it seriously.
 

kickIT!

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Good advice here, thx

Im almost 100% sure that she isn't into me, but I'm almost 100% sure, TOO, that she was into me last year...so go figure...

Whatever, I will just ignore everything like this, that comes from her, unless it's very obvious.

Thx
Christian
 

JSH

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Originally posted by kickIT!
Good advice here, thx

Im almost 100% sure that she isn't into me, but I'm almost 100% sure, TOO, that she was into me last year...so go figure...

Whatever, I will just ignore everything like this, that comes from her, unless it's very obvious.

Thx
Christian
Yeah, in fact, ignore absolutely everythiing. Hell, theres this girl that does it constantly to me, and i hate it how everyone thinks shes the only girl im really in love with and that the others are just like covers and im like wtf.

But occasionally she just comes out (mainly to my AFC friends in front of me) and goes look im a girl with breasts, do this. Probably cos i used to tease her about it. But if you do actually want her, the best response is to pick up on it and whatever you do dont flirt back. Show that you understand but that your above that kinda games. It makes her really go for you and trust me I know.
 

kickIT!

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Ok, i will ignore what I can, but she is in my group of friends, that I always hang out with, so that will be hard sometimes....
She really likes to do body contact with just everyone...and it would be weird, to not touch her anymore. Any advice here?
It's not that I NEED to **** her, she's just...uhm...nice ;)

Christian
 

JSH

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Originally posted by kickIT!
Ok, i will ignore what I can, but she is in my group of friends, that I always hang out with, so that will be hard sometimes....
She really likes to do body contact with just everyone...and it would be weird, to not touch her anymore. Any advice here?
It's not that I NEED to **** her, she's just...uhm...nice ;)

Christian
its not dont touch her, its just dont come on to her, dont touch her back, it will drive her wild, especially if she is a little interested. If she rubs up on you, leave it, but dont rub back. Dont react.

EDIT: just to clarify, dont react to her touching you and dont flirt with her.
 
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"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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kickIT!

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Ok, THAT would be easy to follow...I'm gonna try that for a while and report back :)

Christian
 

kickIT!

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Another problem: What should I answer if she DIRECTLY asks why I don't touch/hug etc, her anymore?
She is the type of girl who would do that...
 

JSH

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btw i hope you are still greeting her, touch her less than you would your guy friends but more than you would to a stranger (you dont want it to look like you are pulling anything off).

It depends on your attitude to her, but you can verbally flirt back. You can tease her, neg hit her. Ask why is she missing it, then blatently feel her up (caution only do it if you reckon you can get away with). I dont find you attractive any longer (but might lead on to you used to find her attractive). So just because you have big tits and are female, i should touch you. Be mock rude (not offensive or too playful).

Normally i would use the situation and only give a half answer.

But the aim is to confuse her, so she doesnt know what she is doing wrong and therefore feels like a womanly failure.
 

kickIT!

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Just another time good advice, thx mate. I hope next time, I can figure things like that out myself...
 

kickIT!

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Ok, follow-up on this.
Background is this:
In our gorup of friends (10 people) we have some internal problems right now, and this girl here told me on the phone, that she wanted to go out with other people this weekend, to get new experiences etc.
5 Minutes later she told me: " But you are my backup, right?"
I didnt say yes, but I think she will come to me for going out together...
I have this one try, I think, to seduce her.

She is a good friend, but no LJBF ever, and I'm sure she was attracted to me half a year ago (if it was physical, she would be still...)

Any clues as how to take this challenge?
Its NOT a regular pickup or so, it's a person I know for some time, so I can't usw standard tactics IMO.

-Christian
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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Omega

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Ignore her, pretend your busy alot. As people have said, she's a flirt.

She took a contreceptive, I find that HILLARIOUS. I guess she thought you were going to rape her. LOL.
 

JSH

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Originally posted by kickIT!
Ok, follow-up on this.
Background is this:
In our gorup of friends (10 people) we have some internal problems right now, and this girl here told me on the phone, that she wanted to go out with other people this weekend, to get new experiences etc.
5 Minutes later she told me: " But you are my backup, right?"
I didnt say yes, but I think she will come to me for going out together...
I have this one try, I think, to seduce her.

She is a good friend, but no LJBF ever, and I'm sure she was attracted to me half a year ago (if it was physical, she would be still...)

Any clues as how to take this challenge?
Its NOT a regular pickup or so, it's a person I know for some time, so I can't usw standard tactics IMO.

-Christian
aight, i think that the best solution would be to go on the kino, but instead of it being non sexual (wwouldnt work as u are friends and therefore low barriers) move up to more sexual touching, not groping though. Move up to the face and down to the body, more like brief caresses than a touch. (I know this kinda goes against kino). But if she is a real flirt, then dont give her what she wants, do the opposite, but again not rudely.
 

kickIT!

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Originally posted by R3N3GAD3
Ignore her, pretend your busy alot. As people have said, she's a flirt.

She took a contreceptive, I find that HILLARIOUS. I guess she thought you were going to rape her. LOL.
Uuuhm, I don't know what youre talking about here...If she has to take a pill EVERYDAY to be protected, the only uncommon thing is, that she takes it IN FRONT of me.

Maybe I don't get the meaning here, could you rephrase that? Normally I have no problems understanding english, but this "language" I didnt use very often.

To JSH:
Ok, thought of some touching myself (no comments as to the other meaning of this sentence ;) and I will try that with her.
As to the not giving what she wants...What exactly do you mean by this? I can't think of anything she could possibly want, that I could deny her, but my attention, and THAT I must give her, if we go out together...

-Christian
 

kickIT!

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AAhh, to spice things up a bit, she now wants me to watch a video with her ;) I just wanted her to give it to me, but she said it would be better if I watched it with her ;)
 

sitnam

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yo next time shes playin those games and all just be like "are you tryin to seduce me?" that always gets a straight up answer. if u know she into u only good things can happen. if she says yes then u f*** her :p. if she says "no", "i dunno", or "maybe" u can just be like "arent i good enough for u?" or somethin like that. then she'll end up saying yes or her body language will be asking for it. then u f*** her anyway. if shes into u then that'll work 99% of the time. thats whats great about the question... if shes into u, either way u end up gettin what u want :D.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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