"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

Help with Fear of Success

DJ Red

Don Juan
Joined
Apr 29, 2002
Messages
30
Reaction score
0
Location
Denver, Colorado
I believe I've figured out what's holding me back when asking for the sale (girls, business, interviews, etc.).

Fear of Success.

Are there any threads in here along those lines, other things I can read, or perhaps some advice to get past that?
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

Makro2323

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 28, 2007
Messages
39
Reaction score
0
Fear of SUCCESS? Surely success should be the reason you are approaching girls in the first place! Why are you afraid of success? Being successful is a very positive thing, so are you telling me that you'd rather fail?
 

The Juan and only

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 4, 2005
Messages
805
Reaction score
8
Age
38
Location
United Kingdom
I'd say you fear success with women because you don't, on some level, feel ready to have a relationship; and of course new territory in any scenario can be scary.

But you have to learn to leave your comfort zone sometimes man, it's the only way you'll grow as a person.
 

DJVladdy

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 9, 2007
Messages
1,037
Reaction score
17
You know what Marco? I agree with him

Think about it this way: we fear what we do not know, something that is new to us, something we have not seen for ourselves yet.

Simply, we sometimes fear things OUT of out comfort zone.

For some people, [failure] is something they are used to, and has become their comfort zone. And yes, whether we want it or not, we are afraid to break that pattern and actually succeed.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

Makro2323

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 28, 2007
Messages
39
Reaction score
0
Good point, perhaps it's just difficult for me to see it in that way because ultimately outcomes like failure and rejection seem relatively worse to me than that of success. Perhaps we should just call it fear of change. If failure was my comfort zone, and success was something I felt apprehensive about, then I'd place the two side by side and hopefully realise that it's better to live my life attempting to try for success than to stay in a comfortable environment of failure.
 

DJ Red

Don Juan
Joined
Apr 29, 2002
Messages
30
Reaction score
0
Location
Denver, Colorado
It's not just approaching girls. Mainly, it's involving the business I am starting.

Now that it's been mentioned, I do believe it's a confort zone issue. "Can I handle it?" sort of thing.
 
Top