"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Help - Wish my gf had a hotter face

Oneday_

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We've been together a year now and she's a very good companion. Supportive, has my back, communicates well, good career orientated.

Problem is I've been finding that 95% of other women seem more attractive to me in comparison lately and it's left me wishing she was cuter. Is this normal? It's bothersome because I'm comparing and idealizing the "perfect" woman through physical attributes mostly like everywhere we go and my eyes latch on to someone.

I haven't been in a long term relationship in over 5 years prior to this and it's very conflicting
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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G_Govan

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Seems you've dated down. There are pros and cons which I'm sure you've realized, and what you're experiencing is one of the cons. That nagging feeling that you could do better that doesn't seem to go away...
 

Von

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Review why you are with her.

Physical attraction goes down naturally but she has to stimulate you.

Having been in relationship where the girl was considered 10/10 or too pretty for me by some people.... beauty is abstract. Even I was tempted by other girls, its natural and it suck

If you are happy in the relationship keep it there, if it make you doubt to the point that you are unhappy. Either plastic surgery or find a new one but will you be satisfied?
 

Oneday_

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I do believe it's the nagging feeling of thinking I can do better. Does that ever go away even if you're with someone both super attractive and great company?
 

LiveFreeX

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No it doesn't and there is no one that is both super attractive and good company, those things are mutually exclusive. Hot women are showered with attention and therefore don't develop stimulating personalities. In contrast ugly women are more down to Earth and spend more time participating in hobbies and interests as men tend to leave them alone or shun them for good looking women. The ugs are very rarely demanding or high maintenance. You've just got to decide which you'd rather have, a good looking pain in the ass with loads of stress or a nice girl that is somewhat boring to the eye. I went with the nice one because I prefer free time for hobbies, no stress and a smooth life. My previous girls were fairly hot and caused me a MASSIVE amount of stress and heartache.... always dealing with cheating, back talk, rudeness, flakiness... nah fvck that sh1t, I'd rather spend my time flying spaceships around the galaxy while eating home cooked meals then dealing with drama from a useless b1tch who needs to be forever entertained.

I'll tell you what, right now my wife is sitting beside me reading a book and rubbing my leg as she does every night before bed. Today she made me a fantastic dinner of fried rice and butter chicken with a coconut bubble tea for desert. In a few minutes I'm gonna go and put in an hour in my favorite game without worry. For valentines day she brought me a rose that she got from work. We are buying a quadplex shortly and taking up residence in one of the 4 apartments while letting the other 3 pay for our rent. My wife hands me her paycheck every 2 weeks for our savings account. I don't have to worry about where she is or what she's doing, she prefers to stay at home in our room and read books. I think she must have read the entire library by now.

This type of lifestyle simply doesn't exist with high performance women.
 
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"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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wifehunter

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I do believe it's the nagging feeling of thinking I can do better. Does that ever go away even if you're with someone both super attractive and great company?
The grass is always greener on the other side?
 

Desdinova

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First of all, how old are you?

Problem is I've been finding that 95% of other women seem more attractive to me in comparison lately and it's left me wishing she was cuter.
Yeah, I wish mine was cuter, but she's not. However, she makes me feel like I'm important and wonderful. Highly attractive women are more focused on making themselves feel important and wonderful.

I've honestly become tired of the endless strings of fvcking lots of different (and attractive) women. Give me a STR or LTR over that any day. I have more fun with the progression of a relationship as opposed of putting notches in the bedpost.
 

mrgoodstuff

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I do believe it's the nagging feeling of thinking I can do better. Does that ever go away even if you're with someone both super attractive and great company?
Does she have her own money? Does she work? Does she help you? Are you considering you can do better in looks, which you probably can easily, or a better companion?
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Tamura

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95% more attractive than your girl is quite a number. This nagging feeling will never subside and eventually you will hold her responsible for your missed chances.

In terms of settling down the best you can do is a low-maintenance girl. Anyways you will never get 100% security. Decide for you, if you can be happy with her.
 

mrgoodstuff

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95% more attractive than your girl is quite a number. This nagging feeling will never subside and eventually you will hold her responsible for your missed chances.

In terms of settling down the best you can do is a low-maintenance girl. Anyways you will never get 100% security. Decide for you, if you can be happy with her.
How is the sex?
 

Malcontent

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I had this same feeling with a chick. I was with her 7 years. Great sex, cooked, loyal, integrity, etc. I just thought I could get a hotter girl. Years later, I've been with better looking gals, but her dedication was still the best by far.
 

mrgoodstuff

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I had this same feeling with a chick. I was with her 7 years. Great sex, cooked, loyal, integrity, etc. I just thought I could get a hotter girl. Years later, I've been with better looking gals, but her dedication was still the best by far.
Whats better? :)
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Malcontent

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Whats better? :)
I don't feel I have sufficient data to say one way or the other. I think I had the most fun with the 7 year girl. The latest gf I had was a 9ish -- people were always asking to take pictures of her, guys asking her out when I was more than 5 feet away from her, etc. I was always having to step in and maintain. Maybe I 'm just lazy, but I'm not a fan of having to constantly fight to keep a chick. It was pretty miserable. I miss her looks and the few times we had good sex. Maybe if I had higher value, it wouldve been easier, but that's an ongoing area of improvement.

If you have a Ferrari, you're going to worry someone may steal it. It looks nice, it's fun to drive, you feel like a badazz, but the maintenance and insurance are expensive. How much energy are you willing to put into it?
 

mrgoodstuff

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I don't feel I have sufficient data to say one way or the other. I think I had the most fun with the 7 year girl. The latest gf I had was a 9ish -- people were always asking to take pictures of her, guys asking her out when I was more than 5 feet away from her, etc. I was always having to step in and maintain. Maybe I 'm just lazy, but I'm not a fan of having to constantly fight to keep a chick. It was pretty miserable. I miss her looks and the few times we had good sex. Maybe if I had higher value, it wouldve been easier, but that's an ongoing area of improvement.

If you have a Ferrari, you're going to worry someone may steal it. It looks nice, it's fun to drive, you feel like a badazz, but the maintenance and insurance are expensive. How much energy are you willing to put into it?
I was thinking the more humble girl was down to earth enough not to put the price of good sex on top of a mountain top and it's going to be good because it has to be good. Whereas the 9 or 10 is going to be extra picky, don't do this, don't do that, etc and it's not going to be as good.
 

kronreiff

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OP, there are no "perfect" women. Sounds like your only problem with this girl is her face not meeting your expectations. Do you want a girl that will be there for you in all ways or a girl that you can sit and look at with no reciprocation? Only you can answer that.
 

Colossus

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A few pearls:

-If you are truly unsatisfied with her looks (regardless of what others might think of you), then this will NOT improve with time.

-Looks aren't everything. Really. Hot girls are overrated; as noted above they tend to have personality issues (narcissism, histrionic behavior, lack of manners and empathy).

-If you can look at her 7/10 times and say to yourself "that's a fine looking woman right there", then I think you're doing ok. Makeup is a HUGE factor, too. I haven't seen many women in my life who look beautiful with zero makeup. Most are downright terrifying.

-Personally I think as long as her face is average/cute, a fit and youthful body is way more important.

-Reconcile your desire for variety. In all likelihood it will never go away. Mine hasn't, and I'm happily married. But the benefits (in my case) outweigh the sacrifice of the freedom to sleep with new women. It's never "free", either. Even if you don't spend a dime, the time and opportunity cost, not to mention the emotional baggage that comes every time you get involved with a new woman (mostly on her side), isn't worth the momentary thrill of variety.
 
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“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

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