"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Help me- there are 2 sides to this so its complex

RiceHapa888

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Im dating a chick and shes always studying for her finance stuff- I mean damn, the girl is always blowing off our weekends to study for midterms and whatnot. I know she isn't messing around with anyone because I have a source which she doesnt know about. Someone close to her who says shes a complete bookworm. She thinks I'm not being understanding cause we keep having arguments..this b1tch has been busy like the last 5 weekends studying and whatnot- I don't understand whats up cause shes putting out more and everything but at the same time it seems studying is just so damn important...when I was in college hell i studied to but when it came down to spending time with the girls I had a few hours for sure-

Is this a problem of interest level or is it just a difference in values, with me putting more emphasis on actual interaction and her thnking about the future?
we're very close to breaking up anyways now cause of this one problem- before I launch her or make a decision to try to find a way through this I just wanted to see what y'all think.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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eoin2000

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1- Would i be right in assuming that there are exams approaching?

2- You'd be surprised at just how much time a person can set aside for sex when they have a pair of balls between their legs.

3- Stop being so needy towards her. You are demanding too much from her. Be a man. Show her that you dont need her to have fun.
 

RiceHapa888

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me and her are supposed to see each other later this week-
I'm thinking though its gonna be huge- either me and her move forward happy and able to compromise or one of us is going to have to next the other- i hate stubborn hos man damn... If I do break up with her (me and her are about a 5/10 on whether to break up or not) I want to go out like a Dj and not a simp though so thats one more reason I need other opinions. thanks
she knows I dont need her for fun since Im an avid clubber and actually demoted her from the weekend evening slot in favor of my friends. But me getting pissed didnt help things- at the same time I knew it might hurt me- my mindset was wrong
 

eoin2000

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Hows about you dont call her? Wait for her to call you, and make plenty of plans for the weekend, so you wont be available.

You have set the scene in such a way that she feels that you are a convenience to be had whenever SHE sees fit. You need to stop this right now. When she calls you, she'll be wondering why you havent called her to request some time with her. Let her know exactly why: YOU HAVE OTHER THINGS TO BE DOING INSTEAD OF WAITING AROUND FOR HER TO GET HORNY. But not in those exact words, of course.
 

JackPrescott

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Originally posted by RiceHapa888
Im dating a chick and shes always studying for her finance stuff- I mean damn, the girl is always blowing off our weekends to study for midterms and whatnot. I know she isn't messing around with anyone because I have a source which she doesnt know about. Someone close to her who says shes a complete bookworm. She thinks I'm not being understanding cause we keep having arguments..this b1tch has been busy like the last 5 weekends studying and whatnot- I don't understand whats up cause shes putting out more and everything but at the same time it seems studying is just so damn important...when I was in college hell i studied to but when it came down to spending time with the girls I had a few hours for sure-

Is this a problem of interest level or is it just a difference in values, with me putting more emphasis on actual interaction and her thnking about the future?
we're very close to breaking up anyways now cause of this one problem- before I launch her or make a decision to try to find a way through this I just wanted to see what y'all think.
Hmm. Are you two sleeping together still? If you are, no problemo, she just needs to study. If you ARENT you are in the dreaded "Friends" Zone.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

Read more...

RiceHapa888

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well we already have that friday plan- but lets say somehow me and her dont break up- I am not gonna call her at all or invite her out at all till she shapes up which means her doing a little compromising and her calling and thinking up something for her to do. Good post- Imma stop making time for her except for certain conveniantly crappy time slots.
 

eoin2000

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Just remember, never EVER let yourself be 'on call' to a woman. Unless you're married of course, in which case you can turn your phone off every once in a while...and pray she does'nt know the phone number of the bar you happen to be propping up at the time.

Happy hunting :cool:
 

SMOAK

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Shes already broken up with you and since there are no strong emotions left she hasnt bothered to make it dramatic->shes just taken you off her schedule;)
 

RiceHapa888

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ok heres what I did.
I decided to keep her around but downgrade her. By downgrading her and not having her in my #1 slot everything she does isn't so big anymore- for example her friend who likes her made a video of himself singing cambodian love songs and he was hella good to (she told me to watch it)- I would have been effected before but I just sat there chillin. I went clubbing last night for cinco de mayo and met this HB8.7 at the club made out with her got her # and will be calling her up later. Tonight I'm going to a party or clubbing. So me and that girl are still dating, I've decided to never ever put her in the 1 spot again and I think I'll be fine. Shes a pleasure to be with as long as I stay less interested which also means clubbing is #1 and weekend evening dates with her will be few and far between. I suspect her IL is about to rocket up now as a result.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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squirrels

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Originally posted by RiceHapa888
ok heres what I did.
I decided to keep her around but downgrade her. By downgrading her and not having her in my #1 slot everything she does isn't so big anymore- for example her friend who likes her made a video of himself singing cambodian love songs and he was hella good to (she told me to watch it)- I would have been effected before but I just sat there chillin. I went clubbing last night for cinco de mayo and met this HB8.7 at the club made out with her got her # and will be calling her up later. Tonight I'm going to a party or clubbing. So me and that girl are still dating, I've decided to never ever put her in the 1 spot again and I think I'll be fine. Shes a pleasure to be with as long as I stay less interested which also means clubbing is #1 and weekend evening dates with her will be few and far between. I suspect her IL is about to rocket up now as a result.
Don't say "never ever", but you're doing the right thing at this point. ;)
 

Reed247

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mine did the same

I had a date with whats her face this friday and she called to cancel the day before. She also got mad at me about not understanding why. So another 1 and a half hour phone call of disagreements and questions. She seems to think it is ok to break dates, she says her f*cking schedule is so busy with her friends, and she needs to see her friends to. This is like the 6th time she has done this. (Cancel a date).
I don't know why I put up with it.

Basically I think she is dating another guy(s).

She is Korean and claims she goes out with 5-6 people at a time, but of course the white american boyfriend is pushed to the side for her other plans.
She probably has some Korean boyfriend who she needs to see or she has some Korean Sugar Daddy who sprinkles her with gifts and money.
This is only my suspicions about her.
I think your girlfriend is the same, I think she knows you are in love with her and she is turned off by that.
Same with mine, made the fatal mistake of revealing how I felt about her. Women seem to really resent that when they don't feel the same.
another f*ked up thing about women.
Viet girls and koreans are really similar in attitudes aparently. Materialistic, ruthless, etc.
I was going to dump my AW this weekend but I just couldn't. It's been so long it's hard to break off. I think next week is the last straw with her.
I invited her to my apt to make dinner and she better put out or it's over.
She gave me this whole bit about how she has never had sex and is afraid with me because she will get emotionally attached or I will, She might move back to Korea one day to she mentioned. But WTF is the point of starting a relationship with a girl who #1 won't put out
#2 Will probably move back to their country of origin.
What is the point? You can't have love so it's pointless.

I guess false hope is whats got me.

I'll bet a million dollars your viet girl is probably seeing someone else and your sources are incorrect. Girls especially AW's never study on weekends.
My GF gave me the same excuse about having a new job in Seoul (while she lives in NYC) and gets paid from Korea to do research work on fashion in New York... And of course it's on weekends that she needs to squeeze it in. I mean the BS this girl feeds me makes me physically sick.
We are bother getting played man.
I am changed, I am have decided to move onto new things, meet new women, forget relationships until I am in my 30's or later. Do the same.
Besides, let's say you had 2 viet girls. If one of them like the one you are seeing now flaked on you, you could go to the other girl. It's like having ammunition in a gun, backup.
Then you aren't left sitting "what did I do wrong". Nothing pal, she is bored and won you over, the challenge cease to exist!
I do all the wrong things with my current GF like lecture her when she is simply a rebel.
They want a guy who never gets mad, but treats them great, and ignores them every now and then, but really means it.
You ever wondered why all of the people you don't like are in love with you and the ones you have crushes on never really feel the same?
That is psychology for you.
If you are always around for her and treat her like she is your lifeblood, what you need to survive, she will begin to look at you like the dorkiest loser on earth. Like you have 4 eyes or something.
It's called "being cool". And you can't fake it either.
You can practice this until you master.
Basically most guys once they get a girl, they get lazy and stop talking to women, then they are left AFC's begging for her company.
So stop calling her if she is busy.

BTW if you didn't get mad at her and the call was cool, don't call her until she calls on you...it worked with mine after she canceled, I waited a week and she called me wondering why I haven't called.
 
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