"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

help me get a date w this online girl

poohead

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 21, 2006
Messages
254
Reaction score
1
Location
Chicago, IL
i've been messaging this online girl about 3-4 times over the past few days. the last message i said: 'you wanna go out for coffee sometime?'

she responds:

Coffee? You live <an hour away>. I go there sometimes. Maybe next time I am in the area we can meet up or something and hang out as friends. I just went out with someone I met on here yesterday. He was nice but no chemistry. I'm not sure if I am up for it right away.
so, sort of an ambivalent response. what's the best way to respond to this message?
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

JC9

Don Juan
Joined
Jan 25, 2006
Messages
144
Reaction score
1
poohead said:
i've been messaging this online girl about 3-4 times over the past few days. the last message i said: 'you wanna go out for coffee sometime?'

she responds:



so, sort of an ambivalent response. what's the best way to respond to this message?
That is not an ambivalent response, it's a rejection and should be treated as such. Move to the next one.

Re-read her response. She disses the idea, complains about the distance, tosses out 'maybe as friends', then say's she just isn't ready to meet anyone just yet.

Hell, the girl ran the whole circuit on that rejection, everything but the kitchen sink.

When have you ever known a girl not to be giddy about meeting a guy she is into? She would drive 4 hours to meet you, for a cup of coffee at 2 am in a truckstop if her IL was high enough.
 

poohead

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 21, 2006
Messages
254
Reaction score
1
Location
Chicago, IL
well i disagree. i don't get the vibe that she doesn't like me from our emails. and i've only emailed her 3 -4 times. i believe there's a way to work it and get a date out of this.
 

flexion_

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 13, 2003
Messages
1,617
Reaction score
10
Age
56
I'm not sure what vibe you can get from an e-mail but good luck. She rejected you as simply and politely as possible.
 

CompleteControl

Don Juan
Joined
Apr 30, 2006
Messages
59
Reaction score
3
poohead said:
i've been messaging this online girl about 3-4 times over the past few days. the last message i said: 'you wanna go out for coffee sometime?'

she responds:



so, sort of an ambivalent response. what's the best way to respond to this message?
That email doesn't bode well. But I would respond:

That's cool. I guess it is more convenient to meet up with people who are physically close that you don't feel attracted to than to take a chance on meeting someone a little further away that you may be able to experience a powerful connection and real chemistry with.

I suggested coffee because I don't know you well enough yet to decide if I would want to be more than friends with you.

Bye:)
 

“The 22 Rules That Turned Me From Invisible to Irresistible With Women… Starting Tonight”

You can skip the expensive cars, the fancy clothes, and the endless gym selfies. Completely unnecessary.

I used to freeze the second a beautiful woman looked my way. Frustrated. Awkward. Watching other guys walk away with the girl while I stood there tongue-tied.

Then I discovered 22 simple rules that rewired my entire dating life. The anxiety vanished. Conversations flowed effortlessly. Women started chasing me for a change.

These rules trigger a woman's subconscious attraction switches. And you can start using them tonight.

Read more...

poohead

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 21, 2006
Messages
254
Reaction score
1
Location
Chicago, IL
well, i pretty much assumed jc9 was right and i was a goner.

so i had already written her back with 'whatever, babe. your loss.'
 

poohead

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 21, 2006
Messages
254
Reaction score
1
Location
Chicago, IL
me:
well whatever then. your loss. i'm not going to ask you to hang out twice.
her:
You live almost 2 hours away. I'm not just going to drop everything to hang out with you.
this wasn't a rejection jc9.

i can probably work this.
 

I'm Joe Dirt

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 7, 2005
Messages
667
Reaction score
4
Location
Chicago, IL
She would drive 4 hours to meet you, for a cup of coffee at 2 am in a truckstop if her IL was high enough.
There's gotta be a story behind that! :D

But yeah, it is true. If a girl's IL is high enough she will ditch any plans to be with you. My current gf is very much into her studies and stresses out a lot over school and such but she regularly ditches her study groups to drive 45 mins to my house to do a different kind of studying ;)
 
Top