T Money
Senior Don Juan
hey, I just found out via dictionary.com that i'm introverted. What's the best way to stop thinking so much about ME?
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
Help for an introvert
- Thread starter T Money
- Start date
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Introverts are people more commonly known as shy. It's not the same thing as selfish.T Money said:hey, I just found out via dictionary.com that i'm introverted. What's the best way to stop thinking so much about ME?
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=introvert
T Money
Senior Don Juan
yeah that's me.
Truth is, I really don't give a fvck about anything, i'm 22 and I honestly only care about what happens to me. And i've done a lot of bad sh!t because of that mentality.
Truth is, I really don't give a fvck about anything, i'm 22 and I honestly only care about what happens to me. And i've done a lot of bad sh!t because of that mentality.
realsmoothie
Master Don Juan
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- May 30, 2006
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Did you really read that definition? Being introverted doesn't mean you're selfish...
GaryUranga
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Jul 7, 2006
- Messages
- 835
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I think hes looking for "egocentrist" or something.. or has dislexia I dunno
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
its dyslexia bro...sorry i jus had to correct itGaryUranga said:I think hes looking for "egocentrist" or something.. or has dislexia I dunno
GaryUranga
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Jul 7, 2006
- Messages
- 835
- Reaction score
- 7
lol can you say bad timing for a typo?
I'll say it, bad timing for a typo.
I'll say it, bad timing for a typo.
A potentially good topic...
There are many behaviors that can make someone seem introverted….for example, anti-social behavior (ie not caring about other people) and depression, apathy, being withdrawn etc.
Introverts are not exactly anti-social, or without care for themselves or others, nor are they necessarily shy. Introverts can be quite social and out going.
For introverts, the brain actually works backwards to that of extroverts. Thinking patters follow a different route. Being introverted used to mean (was formerly used to refer to being) shy, self-centred, focused on oneself etc….but more recently, its defined in terms of mental energy.
An introvert gains energy, or becomes mentally stimulated, by being alone and engaging in solitary activities. Usually deeply analytical, and prefers quality over quantity. Introverts lose or expend mental energy by being around other people…..they can be very social, but frequently feel the need to be alone and recharge. For thinking patterns - the brain actually takes a longer route…hence, the 'slow or meticulous thinker' (not stupid or dumb, but not the type to verbalize excessively…or does so in short spurts).
The opposite is true for extroverts….they gain energy from people places and things. They appear very verbal and out going. They lose energy / or mental stimulation from being alone, or in the same place for too long. They need things to change….familiarity can be a downer. They think best by verbalizing their thoughts with others, like in a group setting. Extroverts need alone time as well, but not as distinctly much as the introvert.
Its rather hard to judge someone as an introvert or extrovert….but the best way is to look at it in terms of mental energy gain / and energy loss. I think that people are naturally born introverted or extroverted (as per the way thinking patterns go), but ideally, we want to be balanced, to fall into the middle of the spectrum.
Re: the opening post….you may very well be introverted, but not caring for oneself, or thinking excessively about oneself is not indicative of introversion. Could imply depression, apathy, anger issues…..frustration stemming from the need for inner change, the need to conquer fears, to open up and expand. Et cetera. When one turns inwards and against the world, they are essentially involved in an emotional war or conflict with themselves.
Self respect and defining ones own principals / and values is fundamental to 'giving a sh*t'. Sometimes we lose our path in life, and it becomes a matter of (re -) establishing what we believe in, and of course, establishing belief in ourselves. Religious or not, one has to define their own core values, their own code of behavior, and develop the discipline to follow that no matter what. When you betray those, you metaphorically f*ck yourself in the as*.
Try a Myers – Briggs test to learn more about introversion / extroversion, what kind of a thinker you are. I grabbed a few quick links….
http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/JTypes1.htm
http://www.personalitypathways.com/type_inventory.html
http://www.teamtechnology.co.uk/tt/t-articl/mb-simpl.htm
There are many behaviors that can make someone seem introverted….for example, anti-social behavior (ie not caring about other people) and depression, apathy, being withdrawn etc.
Introverts are not exactly anti-social, or without care for themselves or others, nor are they necessarily shy. Introverts can be quite social and out going.
For introverts, the brain actually works backwards to that of extroverts. Thinking patters follow a different route. Being introverted used to mean (was formerly used to refer to being) shy, self-centred, focused on oneself etc….but more recently, its defined in terms of mental energy.
An introvert gains energy, or becomes mentally stimulated, by being alone and engaging in solitary activities. Usually deeply analytical, and prefers quality over quantity. Introverts lose or expend mental energy by being around other people…..they can be very social, but frequently feel the need to be alone and recharge. For thinking patterns - the brain actually takes a longer route…hence, the 'slow or meticulous thinker' (not stupid or dumb, but not the type to verbalize excessively…or does so in short spurts).
The opposite is true for extroverts….they gain energy from people places and things. They appear very verbal and out going. They lose energy / or mental stimulation from being alone, or in the same place for too long. They need things to change….familiarity can be a downer. They think best by verbalizing their thoughts with others, like in a group setting. Extroverts need alone time as well, but not as distinctly much as the introvert.
Its rather hard to judge someone as an introvert or extrovert….but the best way is to look at it in terms of mental energy gain / and energy loss. I think that people are naturally born introverted or extroverted (as per the way thinking patterns go), but ideally, we want to be balanced, to fall into the middle of the spectrum.
Re: the opening post….you may very well be introverted, but not caring for oneself, or thinking excessively about oneself is not indicative of introversion. Could imply depression, apathy, anger issues…..frustration stemming from the need for inner change, the need to conquer fears, to open up and expand. Et cetera. When one turns inwards and against the world, they are essentially involved in an emotional war or conflict with themselves.
Self respect and defining ones own principals / and values is fundamental to 'giving a sh*t'. Sometimes we lose our path in life, and it becomes a matter of (re -) establishing what we believe in, and of course, establishing belief in ourselves. Religious or not, one has to define their own core values, their own code of behavior, and develop the discipline to follow that no matter what. When you betray those, you metaphorically f*ck yourself in the as*.
Try a Myers – Briggs test to learn more about introversion / extroversion, what kind of a thinker you are. I grabbed a few quick links….
http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/JTypes1.htm
http://www.personalitypathways.com/type_inventory.html
http://www.teamtechnology.co.uk/tt/t-articl/mb-simpl.htm