"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Having Her Out With You And Your Friends?

Alonso

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Okay, I believe the rule about getting the girl out with you, alone, at an early stage of your pursuit, in order to focus her interest on you.

I also agree with not letting her (in the early stages) invite you out with her friends along.

However . . . after you've been out one-on-one with her a few times, does it make sense to invite her out with you and your friends? The idea being, it reconfirms to her that you are in demand from others, plus serves as social proof among your friends and their circles, thus opening up further opportunities, etc., and it allows you to show you're somewhat casual about her, don't want to just talk to her all the time, etc. And (unless you have male friends who are real horndogs) it doesn't seem to have the downsides that going out with a group of her friends does.

I've never really done this; I've tended more to see them one-on-one (usually, I've been good about not seeing them all that frequently in early stages (by which I mean for several months), leading several to complain that I was treating them more like mistresses than gfs, which was, er, probably not too far from the mark). But is this potentially a way to go (put differently, is there any reason not to have her hang out with you and your friends in a group setting)?
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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nan3109

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she wants all your friends nut juice!
 

Pimp-sicle

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Originally posted by Alonso
Okay, I believe the rule about getting the girl out with you, alone, at an early stage of your pursuit, in order to focus her interest on you.

I also agree with not letting her (in the early stages) invite you out with her friends along.

However . . . after you've been out one-on-one with her a few times, does it make sense to invite her out with you and your friends? The idea being, it reconfirms to her that you are in demand from others, plus serves as social proof among your friends and their circles, thus opening up further opportunities, etc., and it allows you to show you're somewhat casual about her, don't want to just talk to her all the time, etc. And (unless you have male friends who are real horndogs) it doesn't seem to have the downsides that going out with a group of her friends does.

I've never really done this; I've tended more to see them one-on-one (usually, I've been good about not seeing them all that frequently in early stages (by which I mean for several months), leading several to complain that I was treating them more like mistresses than gfs, which was, er, probably not too far from the mark). But is this potentially a way to go (put differently, is there any reason not to have her hang out with you and your friends in a group setting)?
I think once you 2 have established that there's interest from both sides, then taking her out with your friends once in a while is a good idea. It will provide a change of pace and keep her on her toes. Plus your buddies can tell you what they think about her. But like you said, I wouldn't recommend doing this until you 2 have dated for a month or so. Try and save the weekends for your bros and hang out with her during the week when you do your one on one shiat.



PIMP
 

Sexy_Malibu

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Inviting a girl to go out with you and your friends tells her that you like her enough to introduce her to your friends.

It also tells her that you're willing to be seen with her in places where you go "single" (what I mean is, she doesn't feel like a "mistress" as you put it, you like her and you don't care who knows it, even if other girls who normally see you out "with the guys" see you with her) or even that you want to show her off (which is a compliment to her).

It is also a way to see if she can "hang with the guys". There's a big difference between say going out with one of your friends and his girl... and with taking her out with THE GUYS. Some guys (some) find it really attractive if a girl can hold her own chilling with a group of your guy friends.

And she gets to see a different, more fun, maybe even a little crazy, side of you (you have to decide if that's a good thing or not, ha ha).

But it definitely could say something about "girlfriend status" depending on how you work it (it doesn't necessarily mean you're serious about her but if things are fuzzy it could confuse her). I think if your "status" is already clear then it's safe to take her out with the guys, but if she's already sort of thinking you're more serious than you really are then it could give her the wrong idea even more.

And if you're seeing other girls you don't want her to know about, you better make sure your friends 1. KNOW what's secret and what's not and 2. can keep a secret when they're ****faced and 3. aren't going to ****block you or blow up your spot (trying to steal her or just be a ****)... if any of those things are not true, then don't let this girl near your friends! :D
 
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