"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Hate being shy

Jamal

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My teacher told me he talked to my sister and I wasn't really paying much attention, until he told me that he can sense that my sister is more outgoing. I just hated the way he view me as and lot of girls would say that im shy. I just wanted to know in general is it possible loosing your shyness...I really want to work on that this weekend and I just need some advice on this. This week I was planning on going up to this hot chick and asked if she wanted to hangout sometime but dam I get so nervous and make excuses for not doing it. Tomorrow is my last day to do this and I try to put myself in the right mindset but when I see her I just loose my positive mindset.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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Dedication

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Dedication: Do not try to bend the shyness; that's impossible. Instead, only try to realize the truth.
Jamal: What truth?
Dedication: There is no shy.
Jamal: There is no shy?
Dedication: Then you will see, it is not the shyness that bends, it is only yourself.
 

It's-Me

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Jamal said:
My teacher told me he talked to my sister and I wasn't really paying much attention, until he told me that he can sense that my sister is more outgoing. I just hated the way he view me as and lot of girls would say that im shy. I just wanted to know in general is it possible loosing your shyness...I really want to work on that this weekend and I just need some advice on this. This week I was planning on going up to this hot chick and asked if she wanted to hangout sometime but dam I get so nervous and make excuses for not doing it. Tomorrow is my last day to do this and I try to put myself in the right mindset but when I see her I just loose my positive mindset.
It's possible to do anything you set your mind to, you just gotta have the determination.

I've somewhat had this problem, but mostly in school - I'm more outgoing out of school, but I'm working on it in school and I'm starting to get some really good results.

I suggest you start talking to more people, it can be ANYONE (even your teachers). Preferably you should talk to girls, but if you just don't feel comfortable yet start talking to other people. Start with baby steps.

As for the girl you want to ask out, you always feel bad because you expect an outcome. You shouldn't care about the outcame and just tell yourself fvck it.
 

CaptainJ

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Jamal said:
My teacher told me he talked to my sister and I wasn't really paying much attention, until he told me that he can sense that my sister is more outgoing. I just hated the way he view me as and lot of girls would say that im shy. I just wanted to know in general is it possible loosing your shyness...I really want to work on that this weekend and I just need some advice on this. This week I was planning on going up to this hot chick and asked if she wanted to hangout sometime but dam I get so nervous and make excuses for not doing it. Tomorrow is my last day to do this and I try to put myself in the right mindset but when I see her I just loose my positive mindset.
Seems like you're beginning to try and get out of your shell. If I were you, I wouldn't try asking out any girls right now, especially if you don't know them, because that's one giant leap, when you're still only doing your baby steps. Getting rejected whilst you're just beginning will likely just destroy your confidence. Baby steps right now. Focus on being more outgoing and socialising with people around you. Slowly build up your confidence. This is a long process and you should not just rush into it expecting instant results. Confidence can sometimes take years to build up.
 

jeffthechef

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people are only shy when they want to be accepted...specifically by society

so how do you fix your problem?

1. You conform to society's desire to control you and lead a life of constant suffering and short brief moments of happiness.

2. You reflect on the way you're living day to day and become satisfied with it. If you're not satisfied, then you simply make the changes you must until you are satisfied.

now if you're doing number 2, which i recommend, then you might ask...If i'm not satisfied because i'm not popular, then i must confrom to society to become popular. Not true because all the changes you must make will have to be internal changes....change your attitude, principles, and daily routine.

never change to fit the ideals of others.

i have become satisfied with my life...i'm motivated to do good in school...and recently have begun a campaign to increase my sat scores about 200-300 points...i got rid of my second generation of afc/oneitis...i've been able to use my intellectual capabilities to game girls

Make internal changes...After you're satisfied...what reason do you have to be shy? What left is there to be afraid of.
Shyness stems from a desire to be accepted.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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mpimpin

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Figure out what makes you feel good about you. Then do it

Whether that is making money, putting on some nice clothes, listening to music, etc.

Whatever relaxes you and puts you in an "I'm the man" mood
 

SinJester

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Just start doing things your are uncomfortable with. You need to get outside of your comfort zone, that's where growth is. Start small at first. Say hi to people and smile. Then have little conversations. Work from there.

It can be done. I used to be way to scared to even think about rocking up at a part for a long time. Then I became somewhat of a party animal who was going out every weekend and people would be asking me if anythings on. It all started with taking action and doing something I was scared of.
 
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