Zarky said:
I never talk to chicks on the phone anymore until we're "dating." That's 20th century. Strictly email and texts until at least a few dates. I don't send more than a few emails, maybe 3-4, before setting up a time/place to meet. If they want to email more before meeting, goodbye. If they want to talk on the phone before meeting, goodbye. If they're "too busy to meet" for X weeks but we should talk in the meantime, I tell 'em they can get back to me when they're ready to meet; I never hear back from 'em. Chatting/IM has the best conversion rate to first-date sex for me. For some reason chicks who IM immediately will have sex immediately.
I agree here...at least to an extent. You want to be moving toward "meet-up" as quickly as possible.
Most people who "on-line date" get it in their head that they have to move slowly...exchange a couple E-mails, maybe IM for a while, then gradually work up to getting the number, send her a few texts...then maybe call her, then set up the date.
This is BORING...this is equivalent to "being friends first". This is the flat-out WRONG approach to take with online dating.
First of all, everything you're going to small-talk about is in your profile. You're insulting her intelligence by reciting your profile to her, or making her recite hers. Within 2-3 messages, you should be angling for a date.
Here's where I differ from you...most girls will demand a phone conversation before the date. This is to make sure you sound socially capable...it helps them screen out those guys who are absolute dorks so they don't waste their time. If you deny them that phone conversation they'll typically flake on you...but you KEEP IT SHORT. You want to show them that you have a normal voice and you don't stumble over every other word or say anything totally stupid. Again, 2-3 quick exchanges in a single call, keep it brief, confirm the date.
The rule you have to remember about online dating is that SHE IS LOOKING FOR A REASON TO DISQUALIFY YOU. Women will mentally do everything in their power to disqualify a guy, even a gorgeous, rich, brilliant, sparkling man, from being "boyfriend material". They are REALLY looking for something that cannot be communicated online...that feeling of being "swept off their feet".
YOU CANNOT DO THAT OVER E-MAIL/TEXT/PHONE. Period. You MUST establish a physical presence as soon as possible or she will get BORED with you and move on to the next guy. In real-life dating, the kind of male-female interaction we as HUMAN BEINGS have EVOLVED to operate with over the last couple millenia, the relationship BEGINS with a physical presence. You meet the girl, THEN she gives you the number FOR THE PURPOSE of meeting again.
This online crap is a worthless surrogate for that. You will LOSE OUT EVERY TIME to a man who is actually THERE, even if he's HALF the man you are.
When on the date you should be escalating all the time. Go to a place near you or her. There should be kissing on the first date. There should be sex on the second date, or at the LATEST on the third date if there was heavy makeout on the 2nd date. No exceptions.
What I've found is that if she won't at LEAST kiss you on the first date, chances are she will flake on you. Doesn't have to be full-on make-out...but a kiss that's more than a peck on the cheek. Ideally, you want to hear her say something like, "I'm going to be a good girl tonight" or "I'm not going home with you"...that means she wants you to f**k the sh*t out of her but also likes you on a "higher level" and doesn't want to "ruin it".
I've always liked inviting girls over for a movie on the couch on the second date...my couch is oriented sideways to the TV so you can't sit on it chair-style, you have to lie down, so we end up in the "spoon position"...from there, hands just wander. This is one of the reasons I dig girls with belly-button rings.
I dunno about you guys, but I can "smell" when a girl is aroused. Most girls' p*ssies, when they start getting wet, it's like you can almost sense it, like sharks with blood in the water. Nothing like having a hand on a girl's hip or thigh and sensing that faint "moist" sensation, catching that little whiff of something just a bit different about how she smells...I'm gonna have to stop now or go jerk off.
I'm not even much on f**king on the 2nd date...but I will go down on a girl...and have her go down on me. It gives me a chance to get used to the idea of being naked with a new girl. If I jump right to f*cking, I get over-anxious and chances are I won't last long enough to make it good for her.
But I can eat p*ssy like a madman.
This also keeps the sexual element at kind of a playful level. From what I've found, girls who want to jump right to f**king on the first time nekkid together also want to jump right into relationships and all the drama associated there-with. LAME. Sex is "play" for me.
Date lots of different girls at the same time. Dump dump dump. When in doubt, in the beginning, dump. If you have any unease, dump. Pretty soon you will begin to know the signs of a chick who is looking to sex you, and you will be able to weed out the ones who aren't very quickly. To put it extremely simply, it should be smooth sailing into the bedroom. If there are any bumps, eject. Little bumps are symptoms of a much larger issue that WILL come up, I guarantee.
Keep prospecting at all times. Even when you're in MLTRs you should spend a certain percentage of your time looking for more women.
I'm not sure what does this, but it's absolutely true. Girls somehow seem to sense when you have other girls. Some argue that having "options" means you carry yourself in a more confident way...you feel better about your ability to attract women because you have PROOF TO YOURSELF that women do, in fact, want to be with you.
Even if you're actively in a _TR and you're not even doing anything, always be probing women for interest. (huh huh he said "probing")
Like I said, sex is a game to me now. I honestly believe that I'm never going to be able to stop fooling around on the side...I wonder if that will eventually f**k me as far as "relationships" go.
