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"Has goals and is working towards them"

glass half full

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Been checking through the online dating apps, and I always see this statement about what a woman desires in her man-

"Has goals and is working towards them".

So I'm getting the impression this is kind of a big deal.

What do they really mean, and why is it a big deal?

I've never heard a man ask for this trait in his woman. Help me out here, guys...
 

Grounded eagle

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Been checking through the online dating apps, and I always see this statement about what a woman desires in her man-

"Has goals and is working towards them".

So I'm getting the impression this is kind of a big deal.

What do they really mean, and why is it a big deal?

I've never heard a man ask for this trait in his woman. Help me out here, guys...
They mean they want a guy who is working towards becoming someone (making a ton of money) so that they can just move on in lol.
 

AttackFormation

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I think they could mean two things:

#1 - Status and money. He should have a high status occupation and a high income.

#2 - A job or hobby she thinks is cool/exciting. If youre a police or youre already a professional athlete or music player, maybe that's cool enough and you dont need any particular hobbies. But if youre an IT manager or (assuming it doesnt make her swipe left already) a truck driver or recycling worker, youll need a "second persona"; youll need to complement with a hobby like athletics, dancing or music playing that both makes you more edgy and has a performance (goal) aspect to doing it.
 
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jimwho

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It means she thinks she's special, and deserves all the fine things that women want. And in the beginning it means
You have a nice car and can pay for everything. And in time buy her a car.
 

lost_blackbird

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And will eventually be able to take her on nice holidays 4 times a year.
 

TheProspect

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I think some of you are over-analyzing and are quick to assume negative intent of women you don’t even know, nor have any information about.

“Has goals and is working towards them" simply means the woman is attracted to an ambitious man. That’s no secret. All women are attracted to ambition, especially when compared to it’s opposite (laziness).

Don’t get me wrong, there are many women out there looking for a free ride & seeking to take advantage of a man’s resources. One should be vigilant of these women…

But women of character & of a higher caliber are not going to put up with a lazy man who isn’t goal oriented and doesn’t strive for anything in life.

I’m at a place in my life where my finances aren’t great at all, but I believe I’m still able to punch above my weight with women because I am ambitious and constantly strive to be better in all areas of life. Women pick up on that energy.

Having your own goals can also mean that you won’t make her your priority, and that you will have a life outside of her. Despite what a woman may tell you, she doesn’t want your world to revolve around her.


At the end of the day, whether the statement in the OP should be interpreted charitably or not will ultimately depend on the quality & character of that particular woman.
 

AttackFormation

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I think some of you are over-analyzing and are quick to assume negative intent of women you don’t even know, nor have any information about.

“Has goals and is working towards them" simply means the woman is attracted to an ambitious man. That’s no secret. All women are attracted to ambition, especially when compared to it’s opposite (laziness).

Don’t get me wrong, there are many women out there looking for a free ride & seeking to take advantage of a man’s resources. One should be vigilant of these women…

But women of character & of a higher caliber are not going to put up with a lazy man who isn’t goal oriented and doesn’t strive for anything in life.

I’m at a place in my life where my finances aren’t great at all, but I believe I’m still able to punch above my weight with women because I am ambitious and constantly strive to be better in all areas of life. Women pick up on that energy.

Having your own goals can also mean that you won’t make her your priority, and that you will have a life outside of her. Despite what a woman may tell you, she doesn’t want your world to revolve around her.


At the end of the day, whether the statement in the OP should be interpreted charitably or not will ultimately depend on the quality & character of that particular woman.
Just like the original statement, you didnt give any concrete example. You use open ended phrases like "striving for anything in life", "goal oriented" and "ambitious", but you dont materialise these words into anything tangible. Your post was a very long way of saying almost nothing more than what the original sentence already said. I say almost, because you added in "having a life outside of her" and "not having your world revolve around her" which is indeed good, but i dont think it's sufficient to describe what they mean.
 
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AttackFormation

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means she wants something to stick around for once his good looks have faded lol
Do your "pvssy lubricant" wingmates "have goals and work toward them"? lol
 

Billtx49

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It means she’s willing to accept where he currently is in life financially as long as he is centered and wants to move forward. i.e. she don’t want a sit behind a desk bean counter all his life that has no vision and ambition for a better life.

OR, it’s a quick financial qualification process for her with her second question being what does her potential man eventually want to be…
It’s almost the same thing as a woman you meet in a club asking what you do too soon in the opening convo, and if his goals don’t align with hers, she’s gone.
 

Grounded eagle

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I think some of you are over-analyzing and are quick to assume negative intent of women you don’t even know, nor have any information about.

“Has goals and is working towards them" simply means the woman is attracted to an ambitious man. That’s no secret. All women are attracted to ambition, especially when compared to it’s opposite (laziness).

Don’t get me wrong, there are many women out there looking for a free ride & seeking to take advantage of a man’s resources. One should be vigilant of these women…

But women of character & of a higher caliber are not going to put up with a lazy man who isn’t goal oriented and doesn’t strive for anything in life.

I’m at a place in my life where my finances aren’t great at all, but I believe I’m still able to punch above my weight with women because I am ambitious and constantly strive to be better in all areas of life. Women pick up on that energy.

Having your own goals can also mean that you won’t make her your priority, and that you will have a life outside of her. Despite what a woman may tell you, she doesn’t want your world to revolve around her.


At the end of the day, whether the statement in the OP should be interpreted charitably or not will ultimately depend on the quality & character of that particular woman.
Fair point.And I think it’s not just a female thing,most guys want to be associated with other ambitious guys.But if you are going to get into the literal motives behind women saying things like,”has goals and is working towards them,”,then nine times out of ten they will be referring to the accumulation of resources.That is just the way it is.
 

BadBoy89

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I've never heard a man ask for this trait in his woman. Help me out here, guys...
Because men don’t care. Men don’t think about relationships the way women do.

Men just want young and hot and fertlie. She could have a record, be a bad person, be crazy, but as long as she is young, hot, and fertile, men will take it.

Women only care about a man’s utility. If he is young and hot, it’s good for her in high school and a bit of college, but after that, it’s all about the man‘s use and resources Why? Because her leverage (looks) is decreasing by the hour. The man’s looks is going to “help” her, but his resources and use will. That’s why she needs a man to be ambitious and work towards goals, not that she cares, but so she can take them later.

Notice a young, hot, fertile 18 year old never wants a guy who ”ambitious“ and has “goals”, she wants the 6’1 bad boy hockey player. But at 29+, uh oh, the attention and sexual interest from men is decreasing, she has to quickly change what she wants from men.

Remember men, with women, you are not only battling them, you are also battling their biological clock and nature.
 

manfrombelow

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"Has goals and is working towards them" is equal to "be rich" aka have a lot of "resources" (materially and socially). It's as simple as that.
 
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B80

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Someone who'sdoing well careerwise/with a business.

Bit like the height thing, it's something most women find attractive.

Obviously other variables will come into play.
 

glass half full

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After reading the responses (thanks, btw...) I was reminded of a gal I dated @ 18.
Her mom gave me the forty questions before we left. The main one she focused on was "what are your future goals in life?"...
I was real glad to get away from her, she made me nervous af. Her dad sat there and didn't look @ me or say anything. But her mom made me nervous, purposely I think.
 

rjc149

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Lol lots of bitterness here.

It’s just a woman’s way of stating a very red pill truth: she wants you to have priorities over her, because it’s sexy. Being your #1 priority in life is repulsive to her.
 

taiyuu_otoko

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Male Attractive Trait - Ambition

Female Attractive Trait - youth, beauty, low body count

or, you could say your goal is to hit 1000 lay count before you're 40 or something, and that you're actively working toward it.
 
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